One More Time
by writtenrhythm
Summary: LSF Revan left, and has been gone a long time. When she returns, she finds Carth in the arms of another woman. Is it too late for them? Walkthrough of the second game with Revan and the whole gang, with a few additions thrown in to keep things fresh.
1. Chapter 1

Home. The word and meaning had been so elusive in the past few years, but now I was finally on a freighter on my way back home. I sank back into the seat and closed my eyes, envisioning that moment when I finally laid my eyes on him. Knowing him, he'd probably be working at the republic embassy, or whatever he was up to these days. I didn't really know him anymore. I haven't known him for years, 4 years to be exact, but I was hoping he'd still be the some old flyboy he was when we were off saving the galaxy together.

A protocol droid walked by, bumping my arm with the refreshment cart and waking me out of my fantasy. "Would you like anything. Miss?" He asked me. I shook my head and he moved on, clanking down the narrow aisle. I glanced out the window, but all I could see where the ribbons of light from the hyper drive. Impatiently I closed my eyes, trying to make the remaining time pass quickly. I delved into my memory, and reminisced about one of the last happy moments with flyboy before I left.

_It was his birthday, and I wanted it to be absolutely spectacular. I had already bought the gifts, and was working over the stove, cooking his favorite dinner when the communicator buzzed. I wiped my hands on a nearby towel before crossing his small kitchen to answer it._

"_Hey!" I said enthusiastically when Mission popped up on the screen, "What do you need?"_

_Her hologram self peered past me into the next room and she asked, "Hey Lola. Is the old geezer there? I wanted to wish him a happy birthday."_

_I giggled a bit then answered her. "Nope. He's still at the office, I'll tell him you called though."_

_She nodded "Okay. It doesn't have to be tonight. I know that you've got some. . . _things _planned."_

_I rolled my eyes, although she wasn't far off. "Goodbye Mission," I said pointedly and pushed the button to end the call. I headed back to the kitchen to check on the meal when I heard keys rattling in the door. I turned just in time to see Carth enter our house._

_I couldn't stop the automatic smile that lifted my cheeks, not that I wanted to. I went to him and he wrapped his arms around me with a, "Hey gorgeous."_

_I pulled back enough to look into his eyes. "I thought I told you I preferred Beautiful?"_

_He chuckled and let me go. "That's true, I'm sorry. But with a name like 'Hairless Wookie' I don't think you have much room to complain."_

_I laughed and then mustered my best impression of him. "Alright sister. Just. . .Just calm down before you head explodes."_

_He winced. "Ouch. That was terrible!"_

_I stuck my tongue out at him. "Shut up," and then I thought for a second and reached behind the couch. I pulled out his gift and handed it to him. "Here. Open it."_

_He gave me a quizzical look. "Now?" He asked. I nodded and he proceeded to tear the sparkly paper off the box. He opened it and pulled out his old blaster, the one that had been destroyed in the star forge explosion._

"_I saved it. I knew how much it meant to you, so I wanted to see if I could get it fixed. It took a while, but it shoots straight again." I pulled it from him and turned it on its side, bearing the Onasi crest, and more than a few burn marks and scorches. "I could have had it refurbished, but it would have covered the crest. I hope you don't mind."_

_I met his eyes for the first time since he had opened it. I desperately wanted him to like it, and I was afraid he wouldn't._

_He was looking at me admirably, and with love in his eyes. He captured me in a hug again and whispered, "I love it," in my ear. We stayed that way, in our own world until a frantic beeping broke us apart. _

"_What's that?" he asked, as we sprang off the couch. I listened for a second, and then recognized it as-_

"_The fire alarm! Crap! Oh no no no!" I raced into the kitchen, where black smoke was now pouring from the oven. I snatched a pair of oven mitts off the counter and yanked open the oven door. I pulled out the smoking pan, where a pair of charcoaled bantha steaks lay. Coughing, and waving my hand in front of me to dissipate the smoke by my face, I slammed the whole mess into the sink and splayed water over it. I opened the windows while Carth punched in the code to stop the screaming fire alarm._

_Finally, when the smoke was clear and all was quiet, I turned to face Carth. He was hanging by the entrance to the kitchen with a disbelieving look on his face. I turned back to the sink and slammed the oven mitt down next to it. And I had wanted this night to be so perfect! Tears stung my eyes as Carth came up behind me. I turned around and hung my head._

"_I'm so sorry Carth. I wanted to make this special for you." I angrily pawed at a tear that had broken free. _

"_Hey, its alright. We can just go out and eat." He said while pulling me closer to him._

"_I know, its just- Damnit!" Why couldn't I stop crying? No sense crying over spilled milk, or burnt bantha._

_I sniffed, and that's when I noticed his shoulders shaking. "Carth?" I asked hesitantly while the shaking increased. "Carth are you ok?" I pulled back from him and searched his face._

"_Carth Onasi are you laughing at me?" I shouted at him, while lightly slapping his arm._

"_No I swear I'm-" but before he could finish he erupted in roaring laughter._

"_Its not funny!" My eyes narrowed at him. Well at least I wasn't crying anymore. . ._

_Noticing my anger, he calmed down some, but amusement still danced in his eyes. "Hey, hey, don't get mad, alright? Its just, with you standing there, you looked so much like Bastila." he started chuckling again._

_I folded my arms against my chest, but I started giggling too. And it wasn't long until we were both folded over in laughter while the wind pulled the rest of the smoke out the window and into the sunset._

XXX

I smiled as the echo of our laughter faded back into my memories. When I opened my eyes we were going through the final docking procedures on Citadel station. I grabbed my luggage out of the over head compartment and was the first one off of the freighter. I headed to a nearby bathroom to freshen up a bit. When I came out, I realized that I had absolutely no idea where to go. I wandered up to a nearby republic outpost for some answers.

"Excuse me." I asked the perky blond secretary. "but could you tell me where I might find Captain Carth Onasi?"

She looked confused, for a second I feared that he had changed posts, but than a flicker of recognition highlighted her eyes. "Captain? Don't you mean _Admiral _Carth Onasi?"

I blinked in shock. So he was an admiral now? My lips curled in pride for his accomplishment. Of course there was talk about a promotion, but I never though that he'd make it so high up in command.

"Ah, yes. That's him. Could you please tell me if he's in?"

She gave me a once over before checking the screen in front of her. "I'm sorry, but he has taken vacation leave and isn't due back for another two weeks. Perhaps someone else could assist you?"

I shook my head. "No, I really need to talk to him, its important. Do you know where he might be?"

She looked around conspiringly, before leaning in. "Well, you didn't hear it from me, but he should be over at the base chapel."

I thanked her and snatched a map off of her desk. I managed to find my way after a few wrong turns and a helpful soldier. I was walking along a semi-abandoned corridor before something caught my eye. It was a statue. I walked closer, examining it. There was stone bodies of fallen soldiers, republic, mandalorian, and sith. There were four men, set in a forever fight scene. A republic soldier was fighting down a sith. They were both still standing, but the supposed sith soldier was left defenseless. The republic man was driving his sword towards his opponent. I shuddered, and could only imagine what would have happened if this was carved out of flesh, and not rock.

The mandalorian was being fought down to his knees with two soldiers after him. He was down on one knee, using his sword to block a blow from a determined republic soldier. Another soldier was coming up behind him, readying the final blow for the mandalorian. The desperation of both fights got to me, and I felt myself being dragged down into depression.

"It wasn't worth it," I whispered to myself. Both wars, so many lost, and fallen. And we were fighting amongst ourselves when all this was just around the corner. That was part of the reason I was back. I had done what I could on the outer rim to hold back the onslaught, to give the republic time to recover. But I just couldn't do it anymore. Alone that is. I needed the republics help, and they were gonna need mine.

But before I continued my quest to the chapel , I found myself intrigued by the stone mandalorian. Before I could stop myself, I reached out and touched the smooth cold stone. I closed my eyes, and remembered the night I had left.

_I had packed earlier, so I would make minimal sound during my departure. I had locked the door, and slid the key under it. I hated myself for leaving, but this is how it had to be. I had started this, I had to finish it. I made my way down to the hanger where the Ebon Hawk laid in wait. I glanced over my shoulder and paused, in agony over who I was leaving behind. I had left him a datapad, explaining what was going on, and why I was leaving. But how do you do that? How do you say goodbye to someone, possibly forever? I told him not to make any expectations, that there was a chance, that this could be our last goodbye. I told him I would do everything in my power to return to him but. . . Sometimes your best just isn't enough._

_Tears where blurring my sight, which is why I didn't see him until he was right in front of me. He held out in arm to stop me, just in front of the Ebon Hawk._

"_Sneaking off in the middle of the night? Republic's not gonna be too happy. I guess I'm supposed to do the right thing and stop you, right? Lucky for you, I'm not into doing the right thing."_

_Canderous. "I should have known you would be here. You have a knack for showing up where your not wanted," I seethed. _

"_Oh yeah?" He countered, "Well it seems like you have a knack for not _staying_ where your wanted." _

_I closed my eyes. I had lost enough sparring matches to know that the only way I would get past him was with his permission. Thanks to his advanced bio-stabilizer implant, even force tricks wouldn't work on him. "What do you want Canderous?" I asked him, franticly checking behind me to make sure Carth hadn't woken up and chased me down here. _

"_You," he said, and I fought the urge to roll my eyes. He was never going to get it, was he?_

"_Canderous, I'm sorry, but-"_

"_But you love him right? Yeah, I realize that. Don't quite understand it though. Why don't you try to explain it to me?" He spread his feet in a relaxed position, and I realized that I was gonna be stuck here for awhile. _

"_I love him, for him. Because he's good and kind and sweet,"_

"_All the things I'm not, right? Because, of course the one who always accepted you, who always loved you no matter what, isn't good enough for you, right?" He knew that Carth's rejection of me after finding out about my past was a sore spot. _

_I thought I was done hurting people tonight, but obviously I thought wrong. "Canderous I'm sorry, but I don't-"_

"_You don't what? You don't love me? You cant lie to me, Lola. And I wish you would stop lying to yourself. Your weren't lying that night."_

_I sighed. I knew exactly what night he was talking about. It was about a week after we had escaped the Leviathan. Carth's snub still was an open wound, and Canderous used that to his advantage. He came to me one night, said all the right things, pressed all the right buttons and I woke up in the morning in his arms. I had always had that weird tingling in the back of my heart whenever he was around, and he used that to his advantage. _

"_Remember the hate on his face? Remember how much that hurt? And remember who was there for you, who loved you through it all."_

_That struck a sore spot, and I defended him. "He loves me, and I love him," I spat, my eyes blazing._

"_But you love me too," he held up a finger when I protested. "Not as much as you love him, I'd be a fool not to realize that, but you do. And just remember, while he decided to forgive Revan, I accepted you for who and what you are. And there will always be that doubt, in the back of your mind, does he really forgive you?"_

_I pushed past him, and he let me go. My nerves raw and on edge, I didn't turn around until I reached the loading ramp. I turned back around and faced him. "Re-unite the mandalore clans, keep them strong. What ever is coming, its strong, and the galaxy is gonna need all the help it can get."_

_He nodded. "I'll do that for you if you'll do something for me." I stayed silent and he continued. "Come back to me."_

_I shook my head. "Canderous, I can't promise anything. . ."_

_He nodded. "Then just come back. Please Lola, just come back."_

_I swallowed hard before answering. "I'm gonna try, Canderous."_

I opened my eyes and slowly pulled my hand away from the cold, still soldier. I spent another second or two reminiscing about our friendship almost turned romance. If I wasn't so absolutely sure that Carth was the one, maybe. . .

I mentally shook myself and turned away from the statue. I glanced down at the map one more time before heading to an impressive building. It was built almost like a Jedi enclave entrance, only much more lavishly decorated. The molding was a piece of artwork, curling around the doorways and up past the steeple. I placed my hand on the ivory door and gently pushed it open.

XXX

Carth's POV- I splashed my face with cold water, removing the white smudges of shaving cream. I rested my hands on the cool ceramic sink, and examined myself in the mirror. I looked old, too old for a man my age. I had bags under my eyes, and wrinkles outlining my mouth and forehead. The slightest speckling of gray began at my temples, but I still had all of my hair. Scars from wars past had faded, giving me the look. . .of

Canderous really. My eyes were flat and expressionless, much like they were after Morgana died. I hated this man in front of me. He was cold, jaded, and unfeeling. All because of a woman.

She had left me. After everything we'd been through, all the promises and plans we made, it all ended in a datapad. She sounded sorry, I'll give her that. She almost made me believe her heart was breaking too. But who was I kidding? How could I, a common soldier even begin to deserve her?

She had basically told me not to expect her back. Ever. She had gone off to resave the galaxy and left me alone. That's why I was so thankful for Sarah. With her, I could begin to feel my pulse again, although it was nothing compared to the way my heart would race when I was with Lola. I pulled my undershirt over my head and remembered the day we first met.

_Adrenaline. Being a soldier, I recognized the buzz well. Every time I had a ship on my tail, or was in a fight, or was jumping into an escape pod, adrenaline was my constant companion. But this was a new territory. I was going in blind, no intel, no tactical support, no backup plan. Failure was not an option. I scanned my surroundings with a keen eye, looking for anything out of place. Relaxing a fraction, I moved out of my hiding spot, fully visible to any enemies in the area. I crossed through the clearing in no time, pausing when I reached my destination. I carefully infiltrated the premises, still on full alert._

"_Hello?" a feminine voice called out, "Welcome to Sarah's Boutique Critique. How can I help you?" There were racks of clothing, perfect for taking cover from oncoming fire. There were dresses, for one, and lots of feminine ruffles and lace. Towards the back there was more men's suits. I headed towards the counter, where the woman waited._

"_Hello. I was wondering if you could help me with something." I pulled out the reason I was here. "You see, my blaster pistol holster has a rip, and I can't find anyone to fix it."_

_I laid the holster down on the counter. She frowned, "This isn't the kind of work we normally do."_

_I sighed, "I was afraid of that." I grabbed the offending object and slid it back toward me. She placed her hand over mine, stopping it in its track, and sending sparks up my arm._

"_However, lucky for you, my dad was in the military. I was always fixing things like this. Let me take a look at it."_

_Distracted by the way she was making me feel, I flashed her a grateful smile before surrendering it to her grasp. She stepped away from the counter, and gestured for me to follow her into the back room. She took a seat on a nearby desk chair, and proceeded to examine the holster._

"_This is a good quality leather. Bantha hide?" I nodded and she continued. "Ouch. That's a bad tear. This isn't going to be cheap. It might just be easier to buy a new one."_

"_No." I said simply. This was the holster that Lola had bought me just months before she disappeared. And I held on desperately to anything she left behind, anything that reminded me that she was real, that she was still out there somewhere. _

_She just shrugged, and started digging through her desk for something. She re-emerged triumphant with a tag. She started filling it out before speaking again. "So was it from a wife or something?"  
I jumped at the disturbed silence. "Excuse me?" _

_She set down her pen and looked me in the eye. "I'm guessing why you want it fixed so badly? You got a girl somewhere that would have your ass for ripping it."_

_I winced. "No. No wife."_

"_Oh!" she blinked in surprise. "I'm sorry. Well anyway, it will be a few days. I have to order some special thread, and bantha dye to help hide the seam. I'll call you when its ready."_

_I nodded and thanked her once more before walking out the store. I glanced back behind me towards the sign. Sarah's Boutique Critique. I wonder if that woman was Sarah? None the less, I had a slight lift in my step, and felt better about myself than I had in years._

I exhaled in a huff as I finished tucking my shirt in. I was marrying Sarah today, but my mind kept tracing back to Lola. Hell, Lola was the one who brought us together in the first place, when that damb holster ripped. At first, it all started with just one dinner, after all, the girl did me a favor. Then one dinner became one movie, and became one dance. Around her, I could almost function again, almost feel human,

Almost, love her.

I could almost rationalize it in my head. Lola bought the holster, Lola left, holster tore, Sarah fixed it. Could be a sign from the force that Lola was gone forever and wanted me to be happy.

I kept running through this in my head as I finished polishing the last of my medals for my uniform. Some might call it cold feet, but there was something that told me that today might be a mistake. Probably that same small sniveling romantic part of me that still believed that Lola would come back. I sighed, and as I turned towards the door, I remembered the night she left.

_I sighed and rolled over, not willing to face the dawn just yet. I reached across the bed to capture Lola in my arms, but came up empty. "Lola?" I groaned in my sleep, arms still hunting their way across the bed. "Lola where are you?"_

_I sat up when she didn't answer. "Lola?" all the lights were off, and I couldn't hear anything. I climbed up out of bed, and pushed back the bathroom door all the way. "Lola?" Not there. I exited the bedroom and entered the living area. The room was brightening due to the rising sun, and I could tell she wasn't here either._

"_Lola?" I called louder, increasing the speed to my steps to reach the kitchen and dining room faster. Still not here. I full out ran to the back door, thinking maybe she had gone to the courtyard for some reason. _

"_Lola!" I shouted, worried. I scanned the trees and couldn't see her. I ran back inside, halfway hoping she'd be coming out wondering why I was yelling. I crossed back through the dining room when something shiny caught my eye. It was glimmering in the morning sun, laying in front of the door. I bent down to pick it up. It took me a second to realize what the cold metal was._

_Lola's key. I felt a part of me grow cold and I sprinted into the bedroom. There on the bed, was a datapad. Time seemed to slow down to a crawl as my blood pulsed in my ears. I slowly walked forward, each step a lifetime. I gently sat down as I picked it up, and gingerly pressed the power button. The screen flashed to life. I checked the saved files, and found one._

_I pressed the file open and began to read. "Carth," it said, "I ah. . . . I'm not sure exactly what to tell you, or how to tell you. I just want to say, I'm so, so, so sorry for hurting you like this. I never meant it to end this way. Remember those nights when I would wake up and couldn't fall back asleep? I told you they were just bad dreams, but they were memories. Something's coming. Something that I started back when I was Revan, and now I have to put an end to it._

"_I love you. And I wish that this message could go on forever so I'd never truly have to say goodbye. But I wont forget you. And I'm going to try to come back, I just. . . I'm not making any promises. Just Carth, please don't forget me." the message ended there. For some reason, I kept scrolling down, hoping to find some meaning, some answer for why she left. _

_I reread the message, but it didn't sink in any more. Lola was gone? How. . . How could that be? We were so happy, I loved her and she loved me. But now she was gone? Why? The questions kept circling in my head while I sat there stunned, loosely holding her key and the datapad. _

_Something occurred to me, and I stood up and clumsily fell toward the door. I fumbled with the handle, taking too long to get it open. My body was in shock, and now even the most mundane task was difficult. I ran down the corridor, towards the hangar bays._

_When I arrived, the place was mostly deserted. A few people meandered here and there, but I was beyond noticing. I ran toward the hangar where the Ebon Hawk was supposed to be, and found it empty. I stood there, frozen yet again as waves of pain rolled over me. _

_I slowly began shaking my head. She couldn't be gone, she just couldn't. _

"_Come back." I said weakly, my voice cracking due to the lump in my throat. "Please, force, make her come back."_

I swallowed the memory down hard, hoping to be rid of it soon. I walked out of the chapels changing room and met my son on the way out.

"You ready, Dad?" he asked, a smirk upon his face.

"As ready as I'll ever be. You got the ring?"

He patted his pocket and nodded. I clapped him on the shoulder and followed him towards the rest of the church. He left to go join the other groomsmen while I went to talk to the preacher one last time.

"Nervous?" He asked me. I smirked and shook my head, before following him out to the front of the church. He nodded at the organist who began to play. The groomsmen escorted the bridesmaids down the aisle one by one. The black tuxes where nicely accented by the purple gowns that reached for the floor. Slowly, every one reached the front of the room and stood in their lines. The musician began a slow fanfare, and then started playing those familiar notes. The entire room rose to their feet and turned toward the door.

Sarah paused in the doorway, giving time for every one to see her clearly. Her gown was beautiful, mermaid cut if I wasn't mistaken. It was strapless, and showed off her pale skin. She smiled nervously as she met my eyes. I saw her take a breath as she stepped forward in time with the music. She slowly made her way down the aisle, gasps and murmurs of approval following her like a cape. She finally reached me, and I took her hand in mine.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, not only to witness the joining of two hearts, but two souls. Two people, so certain in their love, to vow to spend the rest of eternity by each others side." The preacher began, and I started remembering my first marriage with Morgana. I was supposed to spend the rest of my life by her side. Dustil cleared his throat behind me, and I was sure he was thinking the same thing.

"Sarah, please repeat after me. I Sarah Lyon, take you, Carth Onasi to be my lawfully wedded husband."  
"I Sarah Lyon take you, Carth Onasi, to be my lawfully wedded husband," she gave me a small smile as she said this, her eyes welling with tears.

". . . Secure in the knowledge that you will be my constant friend, my faithful partner in life, and my one true love."

"Secure in the knowledge that you will be my constant friend, my faithful partner in life, and my one true love." he eyes spilled over, tracing little patterns through her makeup. I squeezed her hand comfortingly, and smiled at her.

"I promise to love you without reservation, comfort you in times of distress, and encourage you to achieve all of your goals. "

She cleared her throat before beginning. "I promise to love you without reservation, comfort you in times of distress, and encourage you to achieve all of your goals."

"To laugh with you and cry with you, grow with you in mind and spirit, and always be open and honest with you."

"To laugh with you and cry with you," she paused to take a deep breath, her control fighting her emotions. "Grow with you in mind and spirit, and always be open and honest with you."

The preacher smiled at her. "And to cherish you, for as long as we both shall live."

I almost thought that she wouldn't finish. She blinked hard, and then smiled at me. "And to cherish you, as long as we both shall live."

A small spattering of applause burst out, but it was quiet and short-lived. I noticed most of the women in the audience where crying, sniffling into handkerchiefs or their husbands shoulders. I also realized that most of the people at my wedding I didn't know. They had to be Sarah's relatives.

"Carth, please repeat after me." It took me a second to realize he was talking to me, and Dustil had to nudge me in the back. ". . . take you to be my lawfully wedded wife."

"I, Carth Onasi take you, Sarah Lyon, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I repeated automatically.

"Secure in the knowledge that you will be my constant friend, my faithful partner in life, and my one true love."

"Secure in the knowledge that you will be my constant friend, my faithful partner in life, and my. . ." I froze. I tried to form the words, but they just wouldn't come. I cleared my throat, trying to but more time. Sarah smiled at me encouragingly. ". . . my faithful partner in life, and my one. . . My one. .. ."

Suddenly a gasp from my left interrupted me. I looked and saw a woman start working her way up the aisle, gasps and titters following her like a cape. Some people stood up to get a better look at the intruder. The ones who recognized her muttered her name, a curse and a blessing. The ones who didn't know her begged for information.

"Lola. . ." I breathed. It just couldn't be! After four years, without any notes or letters or communication, she just decides to show up now. My hands froze on Sarah's waist, me long since realizing what I was doing. Like the ones before her, she slowly made her way up the aisle, but she stopped halfway. The room froze on bated breath, waiting for her to speak.

Her face was one of agony and disbelief. Her green eyes where latched onto mine, begging for an explanation. When one didn't come, a small tear glided down the soft curve of her cheek. She took a hitched breath, and began to speak.

"Congrats." she said, and collapsed.


	2. Kotor 3?

Mission's POV- My heart dropped with her body, and without thinking I bolted to her side. I managed to catch her before she hit the ground, which was fortunate because her head was on a collision course with the nearest bench.

"Lola!" I yelled, forcing the words out over a dry throat. "Lola wake up!" I barely noticed the chaos and confusion around me as every one scrambled for a better view.

A pair of arms pulled Lola away from me, and I started struggling against the crowd. "No! Bring her back!"

"Mission," a soft voice said calmly, "Relax. I'm just making sure she's alright." I turned and met Bastila's cool brown eyes with my own. I nodded and turned to access the confusion that was the wedding.

Most were out of their seats and spilling into the aisle. Some were quiet with shock, while others were uttering their disbelief loudly.

"Where is she? Is she alright?" Someone pushed past me, and I recognized Canderous's broad shoulders. He knelt down to Lola's side and examined Bastila's face.

"She'll be fine," Bastila reassured him, but her brow was creased. "We should probably get her out of here though."

Without a word Canderous slid his arms under her and picked her up. His gentle act clashed with the fire in his eyes, warning others to stay away. Numbly, I remembered an all too familiar scene.

_My limbs felt weak and heavy, barely supporting my vibroblades. I clutched at a wound on my side, pain shooting through my body. We were just waiting for Lola to return when all the sith in the academy attacked._

_Canderous and I had fought our way to the entrance, pushing back anyone in out path._

"_Here kid," Canderous said gruffly, and handed me a medpac. Busy with patching myself up, I let the 'kid' comment go, just this once._

_Zipping up my vest, I turned to face him. "Where's Lola?"_

"_You mean Revan? Hell, she's probably back at the ship." His voice was offhand, but his eyes conveyed the worry he didn't know how to show._

"_Yeah. . . Maybe. We should probably go lo- Dustil!" Where was he? Last time I saw him he came by to wish Lola luck._

"_Huh? Dustil? Why do you care what happens to Onasi's kid?" _

"_I. . ." I couldn't tell him how close Dustil and I had become. We had spent hours alone exploring the caves and just talking. The destruction of Taris still devastated me, and he made me feel safe again. It was…nice to have someone to talk to that understood me and what I was going through._

"_Never mind. Come on! We have to find him!" I ran towards the other side of the academy towards the valley of the Dark Lords.I heard Canderous muttering something about damb kids that were gonna get him killed. _

_I pushed impatiently on the stone door and promptly met a sword. It came swinging at my face with surprising force, and I stared at it, frozen with fear._

_With seconds to spare, a blade came from behind me, and blocked the decapitating blow._

"_GO!" Canderous roared behind me, and I took off at a dead sprint. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Canderous narrowly miss the sith's ribs, who was now backed up against the rock wall. I figured he'd be alright by himself, and continued down the narrow path._

_I reached the vast desert and scanned for any movement, my heart sinking slightly when I found none. Panting slightly, I headed towards the tomb of Naga Sadow, where Lola was taking her test. _

_I felt a pair of eyes on me, and I slowed down to a walk. I unsheathed my swords and anxiously scanned through the pillars. I felt someone behind me, but before I could turn, a hand closed over my mouth._

"_Don't scream. It's me." he uncapped his hand and I turned around._

"_Dustil?" I questioned, "But…but where's Lola?"_

_He shrugged and pulled me back into the shadows. "I was on guard duty, up at the academy. Everything was normal until half the academy started running past me, saying something about the headmaster being killed. I knew Revan had to have something to do with it, but I couldn't abandon my post. When nobody came back from the valley, I figured I'd go investigate, maybe help her out. By the time I showed up, she was long gone."_

_I nodded worriedly and he gathered me in his arms. "Its okay Mission, we'll find her."_

_I hugged him back for a second, needing the comfort, then let him go._

"_Come on, we have to find her." he nodded and released all of me except one hand. Careful not to cut himself on my blade, he led me back up to the academy. "We should probably find Canderous, make sure he's okay." Before we made it up the hill, a dark mound laying in the sand caught my eye. _

"_Dustil! Go get Canderous!" He looked confused but followed my request as I sprinted towards the clump of bodies. About ten sith soldiers lay mangled and decapitated, and a woman was sprawled in the middle, her light saber deactivated a few feet to her left._

_I skidded to her side, sand kicking up in little clouds around us. I rolled her over, and found Lola with her eyes closed, with cuts and scrapes all around her face._

"_Oh force, oh no, no, no. Hang on Lola, please hang on." Tensely I reached for her wrist, praying for a pulse. I breathed a sigh of relief for the weak pumping beneath my fingers. Since I didn't have a medpac I looked through her pockets and found a strength stim, and injected her with the small needle. _

"_Lola, please stay with me. I'm not Jolee, I don't know what to do!" Tears where following freely down my cheeks, but I was barely aware of them. There wasn't that much blood, but I knew Lola could heal fissures in her skin. I wasn't sure what she had going on internally, though. "Hang on girl, Canderous is coming."_

_I saw him coming around the corner at full speed with Dustil on his heels. _

"_What happened?" He yelled at me, as he reached us._

"_I…I don't know. I found her like this." I backed away from him, the fire in his expression scaring me. He knelt next to her and brushed her hair away form her face. With his other hand he reached into his pocket and injected a life support kit, and wiped at some of the more major cuts with a sterilizing rag._

"_Hey," Dustil said quietly, turning me to face him. "It's alright. We'll get her to Jolee, and she'll be fine."_

_I searched his dark brown eyes, begging for some comfort. "Promise?"_

_He nodded. "I promise." He hugged me then, and I sobbed into his sith uniform. I saw Canderous gently pick Lola up and began a slow jog back towards the Ebon Hawk._

I trailed behind Canderous and Bastila, following them into the back room where the bridesmaids had gotten dressed. Lola was laid on a table. I folded a towel and placed it under her head.

"What's wrong with her?" Canderous interrogated Bastila.

"I'm not sure. It could just be shock. . . Give me a second." She closed her eyes and placed a hand at Lola's forehead. She went completely still, and I felt the power of the force flow through the room. A glow seemed to enrapture the two Jedi, and the room was silent and still.

A door creaked opened, and I turned to see Carth and Dustil walk into the room. Ignoring the rest of us, Carth's eyes were only for the woman on the table. I saw him walk stunned up to her. He raised one hand, as if to touch her, but stopped inches from her pale skin.

"Its her." He said simply, his voice rough from disbelief. He stayed frozen, and all of us watched for Bastila to come out of her trance.

Bastila blinked and removed her hand. Before she could say anything, Lola stirred on the table. She opened her eyes, and slowly sat up.

"Carth." she whispered, breathless, and they were alone in their own world, if only for just a minute. Then she glanced down and saw his tuxedo and you could see her heart breaking.

"So your back. Your alive." Nobody moved. There were so many emotions rolling over their faces that I could barely name them all. There was shock, and anger, lots of anger. I think I see a little bit of love, and something else. Something that I didn't have a name for.

"So. What's her name?" Lola asked, apparently offhand. Carth only glared at her, unsure if she was actually back.

Bastila spoke up. "Are you okay Lola? You must have taken quiet a shock." Then she realized what she said, and her face colored slightly.

"Yeah Bas, I'm fine." Lola answered her without wavering her gaze on Carth. I felt the urge to hug her, to express my joy at having her back, but I felt something deep was happening. Something beyond what I was able to grasp just now.

The door opened again, and I turned to see Sarah enter. "Um…hi. And you are?"

"I…" Lola started, "I should probably go." She slid off of the table, and I was at a lost to explain how she remained so calm.

Lola started towards the door, but Carth's voice interrupted her. "Why did you come back?"

Lola stopped, but only turned her head to halfway face him. "Excuse me?"

"Why did you come back? Why now, why today?"

Lola examined Sarah's face, and took in the ivory gown. "I don't see how that's any of your concern anymore."

"Your damb right it is!" He yelled any grabbed a hold of her arm, using it to turn her around. "Four years! Four goddamb years I waited for you, and you chose today to show up. And I want to know why!"

"Oh yeah? You seem so heartbroken. Maybe I shouldn't have come back."

"I thought you were dead." Carth deflated, his voice becoming quiet. "For four years I thought you were dead."

"Yeah, well that turned out awfully convenient for you, didn't it?" I could tell just how deep Lola's comment stung Carth.

"Yeah, 'I'm gonna try to come back, I'm just, I'm not making any promises'. Now what was I supposed to make of that?"

"Did you finish the message? The, 'just don't forget me'?" She closed her eyes before finishing. "Never mind. I see now it was a mistake to come here. A mistake I won't make again." She turned to walk back out the door.

"Lola, No!" Canderous and I both had started forward to stop her, but it wasn't either of us that called her. Carth had, and he grabbed her arm to turn her back around. When she faced him again her eyes were brimming with tears. Carth let go of her arm, as if shocked by her emotion.

"Just let me go, Carth. Please, just let me go." With that she walked out.

We were all to stunned to do anything. She was like the first snowflake of the winter, so beautiful and precious, but there and gone before you could appreciate it.

Canderous started forward, but a hand on his arm stopped him. He turned, his hand already clenched in a fist, before he realized it was Bastila. "Wait here. She will return. Her emotions are running amuck, she will need time to sort them all out."

"So we just sit here while she decides to take off again? Sorry princess, but that aint happening."

Bastila deliberated. "I will go. She will need a steadying presence to help calm her."

I shook my head. "Sorry Bastila, but your not to good with emotions and all. Maybe I should come with, ya'know?"

She nodded. "Alright, Mission and I will go." We started out the door, before Canderous spoke again.

"Bring her back." Bastila stopped and turned to him, slowly nodding.

"Please." Carth begged, although Sarah was now at his side.

Bastila nodded. "I will do my best." With that, we left the Chapel in chaos.

The brightly lit corridor was nearly empty, and we could see Lola's figure disappearing into the distance.

"Lola!" Bastila shouted and then used the force to hurry our steps. We soon reached the hallway that Lola had turned down, but there was no one in sight.

"Lola?" Bastila called, slowing to a stop. I felt the rush of the Force wear off and resolve to a mere tingle in my limbs. "Lola there is no reason for you to fear us. We will not harm you."

"Bas, she's not afraid of us," I admonished her gently, "Lola, please come out, we just want to talk." We stood there for a moment, me feeling like a complete bantha-brain. "Bas, is she even still here?"

"She is shielding her presence with the Force. But maybe I could…" She grew still, and I felt a whisper of power fly through the room. I listened closely, hoping for a footstep or a breath, anything to prove she was still here.

"Lola, I know you are here. It is pointless to continue hiding your presence as you do." We waited for a moment, and I saw a shimmer out of the corner of my eye. I turned and there Lola was, in all her heartbroken glory.

She was well-traveled, in a dark tunic that was open and revealed her black tie-over shirt. She had a red belt, clipped to it was her light saber and a sword. She had on combat boots, tucked into them I saw were the hilt of at least one knife. Some things never change. Her raven hair was free flowing around her small face, and her blue eyes were flooded and red-rimmed.

"Say what you need to say Bastila, then go." Lola said flatly, not moving from across the room.

"Look Lola, I can feel your hurting. But running away again isn't going to solve your problems."

She bit her lip, looking like she was trying to hold back more tears. "But then I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't run the risk of ever running into him again."

"The Force works in mysterious ways, and perhaps the Force brought you back here to-"

"To what?" Lola interrupted, "To show me that he will never be mine now? To make me make a fool of myself in front of a church full of people? Or maybe your precious Force doesn't think I've suffered enough in this life, and was just wondering how much more I will take before I break?"

"Lola, everything happens for a reason," Bastila started.

"I'm sick of everything happening for a reason! I want to live my life the way I want to live it! I'm tired of wondering what the Force has planned out for me. And how does this help accomplish anything? If I'm supposed to be saving the galaxy from everything that could possibly go wrong, what did I do to deserve _this?" _

Bastila seemed at a loss for words. I could tell Lola was close to leaving again, but I owed it to everyone not to let her. She was close to a break down, and by all rights anyone else would have crumpled long before her. After everything that had happened today, she didn't deserve to have to stay strong anymore. I crossed the room towards her, the only one who was moving.

"Lola, I'm so sorry. It's gonna be alright." I held my arms out to her, and she fell into them, finally breaking down into sobs.

"He doesn't love me anymore," She whispered into my shoulder, "He doesn't want me."

My only response was to hold her as she cried, and to be strong for her when she couldn't be strong anymore. I saw Bastila leave out of the corner of my eye, and I was secretly glad. Lola hated when anyone saw her cry. I could feel the pain from her, and the enormity of it compared only to one day.

_They had come running into the hanger bay, Carth yelling at Canderous to start the ship and get us the Frack out of there. They sent fighter jets out after us, not so keen on the idea of us escaping the Leviathan. Juhani ran to the turrents, fighting them off while Carth helped Canderous fly the plane. We managed to hold them off until Carth got those hyper drive coordinates punched in. We were all buzzing with adrenaline when something hit me. _

"_Hold up, what happened in there? Where's Bastila?" The others looked around, as if to find her hiding behind the nearest corner. By unspoken agreement, we all gathered into the central area._

"_Darth Malak showed up. Bastila sacrificed herself for us to get away." There was something wrong with the way he spoke, an anger I hadn't heard in so long. I guess under the circumstances, it was too be expected._

"_You mean. . . she's dead?" My voice shook. I mean, I never liked Bastila and she was fair game to some of my meaner pranks, but this. . ._

"_Bah, Malak wont kill her. She's too powerful. He'll try to lure her to the dark side, to help him rule the galaxy." He tried to show confidence, but I could see the worry in his eyes. _

"_We have to help Bastila!" Lola finally spoke and I glanced at her. She seemed, off, broken somehow. Her face was pale and missing something, as if some part of her, something that she needed, had died inside her._

"_Hold on. They deserve to know the truth. Do you want to tell them, or shall I?" Carth asked her, glaring at her with a hatred I never though he could possess. The only time I saw that look was when he saw Saul Karath board the Ebon Hawk when we where captured..._

"_I…I'm not her, I cant be. . . I just cant be Revan."_

"_Revan? What, what are you talking about? Is this some kind of…sick joke or something?" I was the only one who spoke, though the others where looking at her disbelievingly, all except Jolee. . ._

"_Oh, its no joke," Carth said, though Lola had opened her mouth to speak. "The Jedi Council captured Revan, captured Lola, and erased her mind, programming in a new identity. Saul Karath told me on the Leviathan and Bastila confirmed it!"_

"_Your Darth Revan? This is… This is big! Do you… Do you remember anything about being the… being the Dark Lord?" Lordess? I always thought Revan was a guy, what do you call a female evil ruler?_

_Lola had paled, and she looked like she wished with all her heart she had sacrificed herself instead of Bastila. "Small bits. A few strange dreams and visions. That's all." She spoke quietly, and wouldn't look any of us in the face._

_That was it? "Just a few flashes? Nothing more? Then I don't think there's a problem. It seems to me that if you don't really remember anything about being Revan, then it doesn't really matter anymore. You are who you are now , right?"_

_Zaalbar backed me up, speaking in his odd language of growls, groans, and barks. "I agree with Mission," was the rough translation. "I swore a life debt to the person you are now, not the person you were."_

"_Of course it still matters! How do we know more memories wont come flooding back? How do we know that Revan wont suddenly turn on us, again?" Carth spoke with hate and anger, nearly spitting the name Revan out like a curse. "I have been such a fool! I…I swore to protect you! And here you were the enemy all this time!"_

_Lola was close to tears, and she seemed to have shrunk into herself since the last time I looked at her. It was as if Carth's words was physically bringing her down, "I'm not the enemy Carth! Please, you have to believe me! I'm sorry, I wish this wasn't true…"_

"_But it is true. It's horribly true! It…. It was you! You killed my wife, you ravaged my world and stole my son from me. You… You destroyed my life!"_

_Canderous had this weird look of awe on his face, but a flash of anger crossed his expression at Carth's words. "Everyone knows it was Malak who destroyed your world Carth. You cant blame Revan for that." Carth shoot him a look that all to clearly said 'watch me.'_

"_You should have known. I should have known, I should have…I should have figured it out. How could you betray me like this?"_

_Lola was slowly shaking her head, staring at him with horror as he barraged her with his words. "I should have known? How was I supposed to know? Please, Carth, your not thinking straight, we can talk, we can work through this…"_

"_How are we supposed to work through this? Was the woman I knew Revan or… or someone else? Will you change into Revan? How…how can any of us trust you? How can I trust you?"_

_This had gone on long enough. "Well, I trust you. Big Z and I owe you our lives! I know you, and your not Revan, not anymore. Whatever you used to be, your one of us now!"_

"_How can you say that Mission? All this time we where trying to take down Malak, we had his old Sith Lord standing right beside us, listening to our plans! Well, I'll tell you one thing, I'm not gonna wait around here till I get betrayed again. No matter what I won't let you destroy the Republic again, Revan."_

"_I'm not Revan!" she screamed at him, broken to the limit. She turned down the starboard side dormitories, and we heard the metal clang of the door._

"_Force Carth, why didn't you just jam her light saber through her back? That would have been less painful." I told him, then followed Lola's path. _

_I knocked on the door. "Lola? Its me. Let me in, will 'ya?" I didn't hear anything from the other side, so I pulled out a security tumbler and set to work. It was a newer lock, but those long days of travel made me bored, and I knew the ins and outs of it, and the door was quickly unlocked._

"_Lola?" I found her at the end of the room, curled up on the ground, hugging her knees to her chest._

"_Aren't you afraid I'll suddenly turn back into the Dark Lord and kill all of you?" she said direly. _

"_No, I'm mostly afraid Canderous is gonna challenge Carth to a death duel for challenging your honor."_

_She snorted. "Let 'em." she said shortly._

_We sat there in silence for a moment, before she turned to me. "I'm not evil, am I Mish? I don't hurt people, I still feel pain, I still feel love…"_

_I shook my head. "No Lola, you're the most caring and loyal and downright good person I've ever met. And if Carth doesn't realize it, he deserves to be gizka fodder."_

_She shook her head. "I don't know… the way he looked at me, I don't think he's gonna let this one go…" she paused for a moment, squeezing her eyes shut. "When Malak was telling me, I looked at Carth. I wanted him to comfort me, to tell me it wasn't true, that everything was a lie. Instead he looked at me so coldly, with so much hate…"_

_She paused, opening her eyes. "I loved him. I still love him. And he hates me." finally she broke down into sobs, letting her pain out the only way she knew how. I wrapped my arms around her and just held her as she cried, hoping to ease her pain and burden. Right now she needed whatever comfort she could get, and I just held her throughout her breakdown while the galaxy passed us by._

Her sobs finally quieted to a rattled sigh and a hiccup. She pulled away and half smiled, embarrassed at her show of emotion. "Sorry." she said.

I shook my head. "No need. Are you alright?"

She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. "Yeah, I'll be fine. I just…I just need some time to think."

"So are you still planning on jumping ship?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I guess… I mean what else am I supposed to do?"

"You could stay here." I kept going when she opened her mouth. "Look, you cant keep running forever. The galaxy can wait for a week, I've missed you."

"Mission, I," She paused, "I cant stay. There's a lot going on at the outer rim and its gonna take everything we've got to stop it."

That wasn't cryptic at all. "What stuff? Lola, what's going on? What do we have to stop?"

She examined my face for a moment before explaining it. "Remember when we where searching for the star maps, and Jolee said the sith we where fighting weren't actual sith, but followers of an ideal?"

I nodded, "Vaguely, but didn't he also say that true sith died out long ago?"

"Yes, but that's where your wrong. When Malak and I when to the outer rim, we met the remaining true sith. They were the reason we fell to the dark side. They were the ones who started the Mandalorian wars, and the ones who told Malak and I of the Star Forge. They've been biding their time, causing problems and wars from the sidelines, watching the republic crumble. And now their coming, Mission, and I've got to stop them."

"Lola, what does this mean? How strong are they? When are they coming?"

"Strong." Was all she said, her face pinched with worry. "They have many followers, but I don't know when their coming. And if I don't unite the Republic worlds and armies, the entire galaxy will fall."

"Lola, you've got to warn the Republic, now. You cant wait another week while you go traveling to another Republic stronghold."

"Fine. I'll need a few days, come up with a case, set up meetings, all that fun stuff… and I'll need a place to stay…"

I nodded. "Consider it done."

She smirked. "Thank you Mission. For everything. Just, can we not talk about… you know. I want to put it behind me."

"No problem. Besides, I don't like to talk about geezer core slimes. The put me off my appetite, you know?"

She laughed, the first time I had heard it in years. "Thank the Force for you, Mission."

Dustil-She was back. After all this time, she had returned.

Damb it.

I remembered a time on Korriban when she had appeared to me as my own personal angel. She had saved me from my hell there, and gave me back a life that the sith had stolen from me. I had looked up to her, a role model of the light, savior of the galaxy, and someone who made my father smile again. She had been so downright _good_ that it was impossible not to like her, impossible not to trust her.

And then she had left.

She wasn't here to see him fall apart, so she couldn't understand how deep my hatred went. I had to cut myself off from the Force when I was around him, that kind of pain I couldn't take, even feeling it second hand. Every moment she was gone my hatred grew, and four years, yeah, that's a hell of a long time.

Eventually he seemed to move on, and he found Sarah. I don't think she knows exactly how deeply wounded he is still. Hell, I don't think any of us really understand it.

Everyone had left, saying that they were sure we needed some time to work things out. I didn't really understand it, what was there to work out? Just because she showed up, why was everything thrown off track? But then again, I didn't really expect things to stay the same, Revan had that affect on people.

"Who was that?" Of course Sarah wouldn't know who she was, they had never met.

"Darth Revan." I told her, hatred coloring every word.

"Lola," Father whispered. "Her name is Lola."

"Wait, Revan? The Dark Lord Revan?"

"The one and only." I told her.

"Lola!" Carth yelled, "Her name is Lola!" he stormed out of the room onto a nearby balcony. I followed him, slamming the door behind us.

"So I'm guessing she's still a touchy subject." I said to him. His only response was to glare at me. "Not sure exactly why though, she was only gone four years."

'Dustil, shut up." He said, and ran his hands through his hair and leaned down on the railing.

"I wonder how long she's gonna stay this time. A week? Two? Maybe even a month? That is even if she hasn't already jumped ship. Maybe she'll go back to what ever hole she climbed out of."

"How can you say that? She saved you from the sith!"

"She killed mom!" What I didn't say, was how close I had come to losing both of my parents to her, one to death, and one to depression.

"Malak did that, you know that."

I sighed, "I'm not angry at losing mom, I'm angry at how close I came to losing you too."

He stayed silent but put his hand on my shoulder. "She was a hell of a woman, your mother was."

I smirked. "Yeah, remember that one time you came home on leave?"

_"Mommy, when's daddy getting here?" She said Daddy was coming home today, and he promised he was gonna bring me a toy next time I saw him._

"_Any minute baby, He'll be here soon." Mommy was acting weird, she kept running her hands through her hair, and checking the paint on her face in the nearest mirror. _

"_He's here! He's here!" I ran out the door, proud of the fact I could reach the button by myself now. "DADDY!"_

_I saw him drop all of his stuff on the sidewalk right before I reached him. "Ouff!" he grunted when I slammed into him, but he picked me up and swung me around. "Wow! You've gotten so _Big_, Dustil!"_

_I hugged him. "I grew a whole two and a half inches!" I told him proudly._

"_And lost a few teeth in the process, I see."_

_I smiled crookedly, showing off my new hole in the head. "I got two whole credits from the tooth ewok!"_

"_Is that so?" He glanced back at the house where Mommy stood in the doorway. He set me down and grabbed his bag before walking up the sidewalk. I trailed after him, wondering what present he brought me this time. _

"_Welcome home, soldier." Mommy said and it was her turn to hug him. Daddy bent his head to hers, and they started kissing._

"_EW! Yucky!" I yelled, mainly to make them stop. I didn't like being left out of the loop. _

_Mommy laughed and held her hand out to me. "Come on, lets go inside."_

"_Daddy, watcha bring me?"_

_He pretended to act confused. "Bring you? Why would I bring you anything? Its not your birthday, is it?"_

"_No, but Daddy, you promised you'd bring me something, what did you get me?"_

_He shook his head. "I don't know, with two whole credits, maybe you could but your own present."_

_I giggled. "But I already spent it, so now I need you to buy me a present."_

_He laughed. "Now how can I argue with that logic, huh? Alright, I'll make you a deal. If you can find your present, you get to keep it."_

_Mommy spoke up before I could pounce on him again. "Does that go for my present too?"_

_He raised his eyebrows. "I think that's fair."_

_Mommy giggled. "I think I'll look for it later, when we're alone." she said, and kissed him on the cheek._

"_Me first!" I said loudly, so they wouldn't forget about me. I started searching Daddy's pockets, wondering if maybe he brought me candy, or something better. I found his keys in one pocket, his wallet in another. I opened up his wallet, thinking maybe he had got me smash ball cards or something. I found a picture of Mommy and I, and a few credit chips._

"_Its not in your pockets…"_

_Daddy laughed, "Nope, so that leaves…"_

"_Your bags!" I shouted gleefully and raced over to where he left them. I had some trouble with the strings, but Daddy reached over me and untied them. Reaching in, I pulled out a big box._

"_Whoa!" I said, my eyes huge, "What is it?"_

"_Look, its an actual flying copy of Daddy's ship! See, this remote controls it, and this button here…"_

"_Alright guys, dinners ready." Mommy interrupted us. _

"_But mom!" I whined, at the same time Daddy said, "Aw, come on Morgana!"_

_She laughed, "You guys can play with it after dinner. Lets go eat."_

_I looked to Daddy and he cleared his throat. "It might be too dark then, and we don't want to lose it… maybe we should take it out now?"_

_She sat there, thinking, while Daddy and I gave her our best puppy-dog looks. "Fine. 15 minutes. But you guys are doing the dishes!"_

"_Deal!" Daddy said, picking me and the box up at the same time. "C'mon Dustil! No time to lose!"_

_I laughed on the way out the door. Now that Daddy was home, I would get to do a lot of things Mommy never let me do._

We laughed together at the old memory._ "_Did we even eat dinner that night?" Dad asked me.

"Sure we did, we had to go inside after someone flew the ship into a tree." I razzed him.

"Well, if you hadn't been trying to get the remote out of my hands, that wouldn't have happened!"

"Sure, sure. A famous republic pilot can take out an entire mandalorian fleet, but he cant handle one hyper three year old."

"He chuckled, and then changed the subject. "I don't know what I'm gonna do, Dustil."

"Yes you do, your gonna go in there and tell your wife that you love her. Your gonna kiss her, and then take her home and make her dinner. And in the morning, you'll deal with whatever catastrophe comes our way."

He nodded. "Sounds like a plan. I'll see you tomorrow…son."

"I'll be here." He left me alone on the balcony. I watched the sun go down over the horizon, and finalized my plans. Tomorrow was going to be an interesting day, to say the least.

**Authors note- Finally! Chapter two is up. The series will be sort of alternate universe, because while the events of Kotor 2 will happen, it will be Revan doing them. And they'll have my take on them.**

**Sorry Dustil's pov was so short, I really liked ending it there. Sarah will be coming up as a huge part in the next chapter, and so will the mysterious sith from the outer rim.**

**Please review! They make me so happy, and they make me write faster! (hint, hint.) and anyone who reviews, I will send a pre-view of the next chapter!**


	3. My Drunken Nightmare

Lola- I had sent Mission to bed, she was yawning after being up early to help prepare the wedding. I promised her I would still be here tomorrow, and finally she was asleep. But now I wished she wasnt, because now I was alone. I had too much time to think, to wonder about Carth's … wife. She was pretty, with blond hair and hazel eyes. I wondered if she could cook burnt bantha steak, or knew how to refurbish a blaster pistol. I felt a tear roll down my cheek, and I mentally shook myself.

"Stop doing this to yourself." I whispered, and angrily wiped at the lone tear. I desperately needed something to distract me, and if Mission wasn't around to talk, there was only one other way to do it.

I headed for the cantina, hoping for a good hard game of pazaak. I sat down at a table, looking for any notable players. The cantina was curiously dead tonight. I scanned the faces of other people, looking for the hints of a good pazaak player, bulging deck, drinking expensive drinks, and clothes that could be thrown away, or lost in a game. The get rich quick types. The cantina had a familiar layout, a lot like the one on Taris. I felt a pang at the memory, and averted my eyes to a corner. There was a twi-lek dancing there, looking remarkably like the one Carth and I had helped on Taris with her big break. It seemed everywhere I looked, there was something to remind me, a flash of orange, messy brown hair, an unshaved jaw. Gasping from the pain, I stared determinedly at the table before me. Screw pazaak. I needed to forget my own name, I needed to forget fast.

I headed to the bar, staring at the dingy floor as I went. I sat down at the bar, saying "Juma juice," to the bartender that gazed at me questionably. I wanted to start out slow, I had never been much of a drinker. Besides, it had been in my experience that drunk people did stupid things.

I downed my drink, but it wasn't enough. I couldn't stop thinking about…him. I wanted something harder, something faster. Something that would bring me down to my knees. Nothing mattered except getting rid of the dagger in my back. I motioned the bartender back over. "Give me your strongest stuff."

The Duro gave me a weird look. "Girl might want to reconsider. Not greatest city for girl to be getting drunk in, understand?"

I rolled my eyes, "Lets just say I can take care of myself. Now I don't care about the cost, just give me whatever you got, and keep em coming."

He muttered walking away, but he pored me a glass of something amber. I sniffed it before I took a sip, coughing at the burn. The Duro gave me a smug look, and I took another sip just to spite him. This time it went down easier, and the bartender walked away.

I started drinking, and didn't stop. The world started going blurry, and I slumped over the bar, still clutching my glass. I felt invincible. Even he couldn't keep me down. Why didn't I do this more often?

"What the Frack? Revan? What the hell are you doing here?" A gruff voice behind me said, coming closer.

Turning my head around seemed like a lot of work so I spoke to the wall. "Forgettin o'whatshisname. Who t'hell are you?" Mr. gruff voice sat beside me, and I glanced out of the corner of me eye at him. "Oh, Hello Canderous!"

He grunted, and examined my face while I took another swig. "Shavit, Revan, what have you been drinking?" He took my glass despite my objections, and swallowed a bit. "Alderan whiskey? Rev, do you have any idea how strong this stuff is?" He looked at me worriedly.

I shook my head. "No, but I'm finding out now." I tried to snatch my glass back, but he downed the rest. I glared at him, "Your paying for that one, ya' know."

He motioned the bartender over, and asked for two more drinks. "So what are we drinking too?"

"Unconsciousness." I said seriously, surprised when he laughed.

"Sounds like fun." He took a slow drink. "So, mind telling me where you where?"

I shrugged, feeling like being cryptic. "Around. Galaxy's a big place."

He looked down at me, raising his eyebrows. "C'mon Rev, you can do better that that."

I sighed, "Fine. I went looking for sith."

"You spent the last four years hunting sith? That one's a little hard to swallow."

"Yeah well, its true." I paused. "Not just any sith. Bad ones. Powerful ones."

He chuckled a little. "Sounds like fun. My mandalorian's getting bored."

I glanced up at him. "So you did reunite the clans?" I continued after he nodded. "Good, we'll need the strength."

We sat in silence for a few moments, each of us nursing our drinks. "Why does this always happen to me, Canderous?"

"What do you mean?" He said startled.

"This. All of this," I sighed, "How come, every time things start going right for me, everything start to fall apart."

"Because you're a warrior. And the Force knows you can handle it all, and if it did not test you, you would become weak, and fall in battle."

I huffed in indignation. "But I'm tired of being a warrior! Cant I just, be given a break once in a while? I want to catch my breath before the next disaster comes screaming in."

Canderous stayed silent for a moment, before cupping my hand in his. "Do you still love him?"

Did I still love Carth? Yes, my heart screamed at me, "No, I don't." I paused, I wanted Carth to hurt, I wanted him to feel the same pain I was. And I wanted to feel loved, to feel revered, for at least tonight. I looked hard into his eyes. "I loved him, the way he was, but he's different now. We both are. I cant pretend to know him after four years. My leaving left a mark on us both, and there's no way that will just vanish." I swallowed hard before continuing. "Somewhere along my journey, I lost a part of me, and I want to get it back." I leaned in closer, his grey eyes smoldering in the shady light. When I spoke again, I felt our breath intertwine, his shallow and fast. "Will you help me get that part back?"

He closed the gap between our lips, heat tracing down my jaw. I leaned into the kiss, perhaps a bit more than I would have had I been sober. I ran my hand up his hard shoulders, dipping my fingers underneath the coarse fabric. He moved his mouth to my neck and I closed my eyes, lost in the feeling.

_Damn him. Damn him to the outskirts of the galaxy. After everything I've done, everything I did for him, he had the audacity to say he couldn't trust me! "Damn you, Carth Onasi!" I yelled, and slowly sank to the floor of the dormitories after I kicked Mission out. A tear rolled down my cheek, and I swiped at it, bringing my hands up to my face and threaded my fingers through my knotted hair. I tugged, grateful for the stinging in my scalp. I leaned back into my bunk, where the pressure of the drawer handle pressed into my lower back. I reached behind me into the drawer, bringing out a brilliant green crystal._

_I held the crystal in front of me, slightly blurred at the edges because of tears. I twisted it slowly in my hand, remembering all the council's hoops I had to jump through. It was my first crystal, awarded to me after I passed their tests. Carth had helped me create my light saber, saying, "I'll have to watch my back even more now. I thought blaster bolt burns were bad, I'm not looking forward to seeing a light saber burn." We had laughed at that while still at the workbench. I had defeated Juhani with this crystal, and began my quest to the star forge while using it, until I had come across a violet crystal. _

_My face caught one of the facets in the crystal. Darth Revan's face. With all my strength, __I threw it at the opposite wall, reveling in the resounding crash. "I hate you!" I screamed, "I hate all of your lies!" I finally broke down, slumping onto the floor in a fit of sobs. I heard footsteps coming to my room, and a second too late I raised my hand to jam the door._

"_Go away." I said to Canderous, glaring at him._

_He glanced around the room, taking in the light green crystal shards sparkling gently against the durosteel wall. "Not likely, Rev."_

_I flinched at the name, my name. "Don't call me that."_

_He crossed the room and knelt down beside me. "Why not? Its who you are," his rough hand pushed my hair back from my wet face, and around my ear. "You were the greatest warrior the galaxy had ever seen. The Mandalorians had conquered entire planets, threatening the Republic itself, the entire galaxy still trembles at our name, because nobody could best us. Nobody that is, except you. I'm your man until the end, Rev, however this turns out."_

_I pushed him back and stood up, crossing the small room. "I don't want to be Revan! I don't want to know I did all of those horrible things…" I crumpled again, too exhausted by my own emotions._

"_Then look at where we are! Look at what we're doing! I'll admit, saving the Republic wasn't too high on my list of priorities, but these honorless sith dogs, deserve to be stopped, and that's what your doing."_

_I laughed bitterly, despair threatening to pull me down. "They lied to me, Canderous. They told me I was Lola Amazzu, destined to save the galaxy. This," I picked up the chards of crystal and let it fall through my fingers, "This entire __being__ that I am, is nothing but a lie!" I threw the shards of glass, my anger and hate contrasting sharply with the light tinkling. We stayed silent for a few seconds, breathing loudly, until I spoke again. "I had a mother and a father on Amorris, a small back water planet on the edges of the galaxy. I was an only child, spoiled rotten, and I loved my parents. The mandalorians attacked, and my entire family died. I was 17, and I hopped on the nearest ship to the farthest away planet. I became what some may call a scoundrel, doing what was necessary to survive, helping any of those less fortunate than I. I was too young to sign up for the Republic, so I mostly stayed out of the wars. Until the sith struck, then I went to the nearest recruiting center and volunteered my skills. And that was my life, at least so I though. But as it turns out, I was too busy conquering my own galaxy to do any of that stuff!" I paused, as waves of pain washed over me. "My entire life was a lie, Canderous. I just thought I had an excellent memory, being able to recall so many details, my mothers face, my fathers smile, my own room in our small house…" I broke down into sobs, which was completely unlike me, but I felt I deserved the right. _

"_The ultimate test, is not one a master can force on his pupil, but one a warrior must test himself." Canderous quoted, from some long forgotten ore of mandalorian tradition. "The test you face now, is not being Revan, or destroying the star forge, but fighting past this." He knelt down by me again, and pulled my face up to meet his. "Can you fight this?"_

_I swallowed hard, thinking about his question. To say no was to admit weakness, and to forever dishonor myself in his eyes. "Can you help me?"_

_An uncharacteristic gleam of tenderness appeared in his eyes, and he pulled me into his arms, crushing me against his chest. "There is no dishonor in asking for help."_

_I gasped silently, stunned by his acceptance. To accept a broken warrior, was against everything he was taught. I could feel his love in his tight brands of muscle, and I pulled back to look him in the face. "Tell me." I begged, needing to hear the words._

"_I love you." He bent his face down to mine, and fused our lips together. _

_I expected demands, he showed me patience. I expected strength, he showed me tenderness. And that night, when I needed it the most, he showed me acceptance._

A warm hand woke me in the morning, pushing my hair out of my face. I groaned and rolled over, refusing to wake up.

"Hey, my little warrior. Wake up." I heard a rough voice call out, and I froze. I slowly opened my eyes, seeing the bright sun come streaming in the window, and reflecting off of Mandalore's helmet. I sat up, wide awake. "Canderous?"

"Yeah?" He asked me, while handing me a cup of caffa. I took a sip of the warm drink, while remembering last night.

"Nothing, I just… can you give me a minute?" He examined my face and nodded, before heading out of the room. I glanced around the room, throwing my face into my hands when I saw my clothes on the other side of it. _WHAT was I thinking?_

I gathered my clothes from around the room, while using the Force to heal the slight hangover I still had left. I finished the caffa for courage, then sighed before I exited the room.

I entered a kitchen area, that was notably barren. I saw a datapad left on the counter, so I picked it up and pressed the power button. _Revan,_ it said,_ I know you might need some time to work things out. Mission called while you where still asleep, and said she had set up a meeting for you at the Republic Embassy, sounded important. I'll catch up with you later, we have some things to talk about._ Here the entry ended, and I shut the datapad down. I sighed, before grabbing my lightsaber and another cup of caffa, and headed off to the Republic Embassy.

The secretary was signing some forms when I walked up, which she promptly put down. "Hello, how may I help you?"

I glanced around, unsure of what Mission had got me into. "Um…hi. I was supposed to be here for a meeting, but I'm not sure where to go…"

She nodded, and pulled up a screen on her electronic desk, wiping the papers to the side. "Of coarse. If I could have your name please?"

I deliberated a moment, wondering what name she could have meant. "Lola Amazzu."

She typed it in, and a meeting time popped up. "Well it says here that your meeting is a noontime, with Admiral Carth Onasi.."

"WHAT?" I about screamed at the poor girl, shock covering her face.

She looked terrified, which I didn't blame her. "Um… He was the only one available for a meeting in the near future…will that be a problem?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose. Of coarse he was the only one available, he was supposed to be on his honeymoon, which is why they didn't schedule him anything. "No, it will… it'll be fine. Just, hook me up."

She shakily reached for her communicator. "Excuse me, Admiral Onasi, but you 12 o'clock had shown up. Shall I let her in?" Carth's hologram self popped up, and I blanched at the though of being in a meeting with him, by myself.

"My 12 o'clock? I wasn't aware I had a meeting now, who is it?" The poor girl glanced at me, before answering him.

"A Ms. Lola Amazz-"

"WHAT?" She jumped at his yelling, and I saw the miniature Carth turn and finally look at me. "Lola? What the hell are you doing here?"

"You brain-dead lice ridden bantha, why the hell do you think I'm here? To warn the Republic about the sith!" I folded my hands on my hips, petulant at his reaction.

"Oh yeah? I thought the 'hero of the galaxy' would have had it all sorted out by now."

"Well unlike somebody, I haven't been sitting on my arse the whole time, filling out forms."

He turned back to the secretary, "Isn't there anyone else that can handle this?" She gaped at him open mouthed, and I interrupted.

"Don't get excited, Flyboy, its strictly a business call." I told him, speaking over the secretary.

"Whatever. Send her in." I heard his comlink disconnect, and I smiled sweetly at the secretary.

"All right then, down the hall and to the right, right?" She stared at me, astonished that I spoke to her precious admiral that way. I shrugged and followed my own directions, walking into his office without knocking.

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?" He gestured to a chair while still glaring at me. It was odd, he could glare at me and still act completely civil.

"Just the entire galaxy is in peril yet again." I propped my feet up on his desk.

"Ah," he said, eyeing my boots. "Galaxy on the brink of destruction, centuries of mayhem and destruction, evil sith dictatorship to span the course of time?"

"Yep. Same old, same old." I snagged a piece of candy from a dish on his desk. "But don't sound so excited, Flyboy, its bad for the public."

"Trust me, I'm not." He sighed. "So what new disaster is combing the edges of the galaxy this time?"

I popped the small sugary tablet into my mouth, and fixed y gaze on the wrapper, as I slowly folded it into small squares, taking my sweet time to organize my thoughts. "So," he asked, "Are you going to explain what's coming?"

I sighted and flicked the paper into the nearest wastebasket. "Let me start at the beginning. When Malak and I went to the outer rim to fight the Mandalorians, we found something. There were places, whole planets even, seeped in the power of the dark side. There, the old and true sith lords waited, waiting for their time to strike. They actually started the Mandalorian wars, as a way to disrupt and weaken the Republic. When the Jedi came, the sith lords manipulated key battles, feinting and attacking, not to win the wars, but to draw the Jedi to these places. At the final battle of Malachor, many Jedi were taken prisoner, and taken to these places, to be turned to the dark side. The ones who were strong were murdered. Malak and I managed to escape, though we were changed. We had seen the power and mercilessness of these lords." I paused looking down. The visions, the memories had been some of my worst. The pain of hearing my childhood friends being tortured to the dark side... that memory had taken a while to shake. "We knew the Republic, being weak and corrupt from the war, would not be able to protect itself. The galaxy needed a leader, someone to unite all the planets. We had learned of the star forge on Dantooine, when we found the first map. We didn't know what it was, but we had heard rumors of something called the star forge."

Carth interrupted me, in his soldier mode. "Wait, so you found the star map before the Mandalorian wars?"

I nodded. "We were already planning on leaving before we found it, so we didn't bother reporting it to the council. We didn't know then what the map was too. When we were captured, we had heard rumors of the star forge. That's actually the next part of the story." I paused, waiting to see if he had any more questions. He gestured for me to continues, and I took a deep breath.

"As I said, the galaxy needed a leader. So we searched for the remaining star maps, finally discovering the star forge, and built up our fleet. We used the dark side as a tool, to recruit soldiers. But for Malak, it proved to be too much. He forgot about saving the Republic, and wanted to crush it. Instead of converting, he began conquering. He couldn't handle the power, and it began to consume him. I tried to remind him of our original goal and he thought me weak. When the Jedi strike team boarded our vessel, he saw his chance and stroke." I paused, "You know what happened them."

This was the hard part, to explain about why I left, about why I left him. "After the Jedi civil war, I began having these visions of something left unfinished on the outer rim. Because of Malak, the galaxy is in even more turmoil, with no real leader. I went to stop them, to give the Republic time to recover, and to find out more about them. But they're still coming, and they're stronger than before." My voice grew quiet. "We made a mistake in thinking we could use the dark side as a tool. I lost my best friend, myself, and a hell of a lot of people, for absolutely nothing. And now, the entire galaxy could fall."

Carth leaned back in his chair, putting his hands behind his head and inhaling deeply. Finally he spoke, "We need to warn the Republic. I'll set up and emergency meeting for tomorrow, and you can tell them what you're telling me now."

I nodded, and stood up to go. "Until tomorrow then, Admiral Onasi."

"Until tomorrow, Jedi Lola." I examined his face one last time before turning and walking out of his office. I _would _see him tomorrow. I held on to that promise.

I walked home to Mission's apartment, needing time to prepare myself for tomorrows meeting. I passed through a narrow alleyway, needing to get home as fast as possible. I was almost halfway through it, when I heard a footstep behind me. I reached out with the force, but couldn't feel anything. As I took a step forward, I turned on my heel, and drew my light saber at the same time. Before I could fully register the picture, a boot flew into my face. I fell to the ground, my unknown attacker flying on top of me. He straddled my waist, blocking me from getting up, and landed a punch, full in my face. When he drew back for another punch, I drew my knee up and thrust upward, managing to unbalance him enough for me to get away.

I flipped up onto my feet, and saw him draw a knife. As he came at me, I grabbed his arm and flung it upward to block the stab, and punched him as hard as I could. Using the arm I had in my grasp, I turned him around, and pushed him into the wall, using my weight to keep him pinned.

"Who are you?" I grunted, and he responded by slamming his elbow into my right cheek. He pulled away from me, and I used the momentum to twist and kick him in the face. While he was unbalanced, I retrieved my light saber from where it had fallen when I was pounced. I ignited it, and came to him, taking the offensive.

I brought down the light saber in a swing that would have taken off his right arm, but he turned and grabbed my head, bringing his knee up to my nose. I twisted away again, striking horizontally at his midsection, but he ducked and when I came around on the back swing, he punched my solar plexus, knocking the breath out of me. I grunted from the pain, but he left himself open, and I jabbed again. He thrust himself against the wall to avoid the blade, then grabbed my arm and twisted it, gaining temporary control of my weapon.

With my opposite leg I kicked the back of his knees, knocking him down and thrusting my arm up, I freed myself from his grasp. When he was off balance I reached for the Force to hold him there, but instead found the Force out of my grasp. The harder I looked for it, the weaker I felt.

He stood up quickly, trying to slam the top of his head into my chin, but I stepped back before he could. We faced each other, both sizing the other up. I noticed the sith symbol on his cloak, and I narrowed my eyes. No wonder I couldn't land a blow, I had let the safety of Telos relax me, and now I was paying for it. I brought the blade up in front of me, waiting to see his next attack. He stood in front of me, and brought his hands up. So he wanted to fight Echani style? Fine. I deactivated my blade, and re-clipped it to my belt. Fighting with it would only prove a hindrance.

He came at me, thrusting his fist out, but I side stepped it, and grabbing his arm, I turned him to me and thrust my knee into his face, quickly stepping down before he could grab it. I pulled his arm until I had his back to me, and tried to wrap my arm around his neck. Again I reached for the Force to help me hold him, but I felt cold and empty, and the feeling distracted me. He elbowed me in the stomach, and I stepped back out of pain. He turned back to me, and we paused, both slightly out of breath.

He tried to punch me again, but I ducked, getting the feel for his attacks. I jutted my leg out and swung, tripping him. He landed on his back, and using my other leg to propel me, I jumped and landed on his stomach, pulling a knife out of my belt as I went. I put the blade against his neck, pushing down just enough to cut the skin.

"What do you want from me?" I felt him struggle under me, but I placed my other hand on his shoulder, pinching his nerves there.

"Your death." He spat, slightly out of breath. I pushed harder on the knife, and I felt him wince.

"Well, that's just too bad. Who sent you?"

Despite the pain he was in, he leered up at me. "The most powerful sith lord in history. You are all doomed!"

I narrowed my eyes, "The most powerful sith lord in history, huh? Hate to break it to you, but that was me. I was even strong enough to resist the dark side." I pushed my weight on to the knife, cutting into his artery there and ending his murdering life. I slid off of him, and rested my weight against the brick wall at my back, halfway standing up. Man, this would be fun to explain to the authorities.

**a/n- Hi! Sooo sorry this chapter took so long, this is probably the third time I wrote it. This was only supposed to be the first half of the chapter, but I'm sick of staring at this. So, the next chapter will move faster, and will have different points of views, and some more flashbacks.**

**anything you would want to see, a flashback from the games you want to appear here? send me a messege, i'm suffering from a serious case of writers block, and i would LOVE suggestions! :)**

**Tell me what you guys think! That was my first fight scene, did you like it? How about the way I explained the mysterious sith? Please review, and I'll send you a preveiw of the next chapter! :)**


	4. Bodies and Admirals and Jedi, Oh MY!

Sarah-I woke up in the morning, sighing into my pillow, not ready to greet the day. I rolled over on my back, letting the sunshine warm my face, listening for any sounds from other rooms. I heard a dish clank in the kitchen, which meant Carth must be up. Even though I had gone to bed early, I didn't want to get up. Getting up and dealing with everybody meant that yesterday really did happen. Revan, she really had come and crashed our wedding. I had heard a lot about her, everybody in the galaxy had. But for me, it had been more personal than that. Before I met Carth, she was just another name on the holonet. But when I had finally broke him down, he spilled his life story. Their entire past, the story behind the star forge and our savoir.

I rolled out of bed, picking a shirt from Carth's closet and sliding it on. I padded barefooted down the hallway to the kitchen, where I had heard Carth. I stopped at the doorway, and watched him make a cup of caffa. I rested my head against the wood frame, remembering the struggle our romance was.

_I was enthralled by this stranger named Carth. I was crazy to love him, because I knew he would never be there for me. He wouldn't let himself be there for anybody. But there was this beauty, a strength, this wildness about him, a sorrow that drew me like a magnet. And I sensed how deep his pain was, his need. I wanted to reach out to him, to save him from his dark despair. But the stubborn fool just wouldn't let me, wouldn't let anybody near him. _

_We were relaxing in the empty courtyard, just enjoying the last trickles of light before the sun went down. It was just warm enough to get by without a cloak, but we were both sipping steaming cups of caffa. "So what are you going to do about Dar-Faur?" I waited for a moment, but he was gone, lost in the horizon. "Carth...Carth!" _

"_Hmm? What?" He looked at me blankly, not realizing why I was upset. _

_I sighed, shaking my head softly. "Never mind. Do you want another drink?"_

_He glanced into his near empty cup, as if forgetting he had it. "No thanks. I think I'll go to the office in a bit."_

"_Wonderful." I said sarcastically, getting up and going into the small apartment._

"_What's that supposed to mean?"_

_I kept walking, reaching for the door, and I slid it open. "Nothing."_

"_Look," he said, following me into the house, "You know the civil disputes on Dar-Faur will have me working my arse off for at least the next 6 months."_

_I dumped my glass in the sink and watched it swirl down the drain. "Yeah, yeah. And if it wasn't that it would be something else. Its ok, you don't need an excuse."_

"_Then don't make it sound like I'm punching a time clock around here!" He exploded, glaring at me._

_I whipped around, narrowing my eyes dangerously. "Time clock? You were supposed to be here at 7:30 last night for dinner! I didn't get a call until well after midnight! I should have gone out without you!"_

"_Then why didn't you?" he asked angrily._

"_Because I happen to be in love with you Carth!" I sighed, pressing my hand against my forehead. "What is wrong with you? Are you afraid to be anywhere but at you desk? Afraid you might fall in love with me too? Would that be so bad?"_

"_Don't be ridiculous. You know my schedule, you should know better than anyone."_

"_I do, Carth," I said quietly, tired of yelling. "Which is why I know half the hours you work aren't justified. You use work as a way to hide. You hide from yourself, from me, and life." And Lola, but I didn't say that._

"_That's ridiculous," he said again, striding around me. I could feel him shutting down. "Besides, what do you want from me? I thought we cleared this up in the beginning, I told you I didn't want-"_

"_You didn't want to get involved, you were afraid to get hurt again. You didn't tell me you were afraid to live! You didn't tell me you were afraid to care at all, afraid to be a human being!"_

"_So?"_

_So. He really didn't care. The shutta of it was, he really didn't give a dam. I left the kitchen, so he wouldn't see the tears beginning to sparkle in my eyes. I stood there trembling for a moment, desperately wanting to reach out to him, knowing it wouldn't change anything. _

"_Look, i'm sorry. I'm just… not built that way." I felt his warm hands caress my arms._

"_As you said before, so?"_

_I felt him sigh behind me. "You know I can't handle that kind of pressure."_

"_It's not pressure Carth, its love." I pulled away from him, and turned around. "Was it like that with her too? Were you afraid to love her? Is it easier now that she's gone? Now you can spend your whole life hiding behind the tragedy of how much you miss her. How convenient."_

"_How dare you." He said, and I saw the hatred rising in his eyes. "How dare you twist the things I've told you."_

"_I'm not twisting, Carth, I'm asking. If I'm wrong, I'm sorry, but I'm starting to wonder if I am." He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me too him. "Carth," I started, but he silenced me with his lips. I responded to him, wrapping my arms around him, kissing him back with all of me. But in that brief moment in his arms, I hated myself more than I did him. Because no matter how much I hated him for the way he treated me, I knew in my heart that I wanted to be there. No matter how much it cost me, I would always be there for him._

"Good morning," I said to him, and crossed the room. "So, when are we gonna get married?"

He smirked, but his eyes were dull. "Listen, we will get married again, and soon. I just… I need some time to think."

I finally looked at him for the first time today, I mean really looked at him. Republic uniform on, clean shaven, and a flask of caffa in one hand, his briefcase in another. "Damb you. Your going to work, aren't you?" I glared at him accusingly.

He nodded silently, and waited for the rest of my response. "Carth, why does it always have to be this way? If something happens, if something goes slightly against plans, you always run and hide. For once, cant I be the one you run too?"

He sighed, and ran his hands through his hair, "Look, I'm not running away. I just need some time alone to think…about things."

"Well, talk to me first. So, Revan shows up at our wedding yesterday. Wanna explain why?"

"I don't know why, I just know she did. Now I have to go before I'm late." he gave me a (Distracted? Removed? Impersonal?) peck on the check, and walked out the door. I sighed and hopped up on the counter, opening the cabinet beside me and grabbing a cup, filled it with caffa. I drank it black, too lazy to get up and get the sugar out.

"Happy honeymoon to me," I sighed. Not the way I had pictured it. I mean, when I pictured my wedding, I actually ended up married! But whatever, I knew just what I needed to cheer me up, shopping!

As I got ready to go to the stores, I reminisced about one of my favorite nights with Carth.

_He came to the shop just as I was closing up. I heard the bell tinkle and I turned around to face him in all of his Republic glory. He was wearing his uniform, black plants and medals pinned on a jacket. _

"_Well hello soldier. Care to help a damsel in distress?" I winked at him._

"_Sure. What do you need done?" _

_I gestured at the top shelf, "I need to get a pair of gloves down for a customer, but I cant reach it… I was about to go get the ladder in back but if you could get it down…" He reached up while I was talking and grabbed the elusive box. "Thank you." I smiled at him._

"_There, now you owe me a favor." he said, smiling back, but I could tell he was uncomfortable. _

"_Oh yeah? Well I don't know if I like the sound of that…" I teased him, walking over to the front counter._

"_Yeah? Well listen. Tonight they are having a ball at the Republic embassy to celebrate the two year anniversary of the battle at the star forge. I wasn't planning on going, but I was overruled, and since it is a ball… I was wondering if…what I mean is…"_

_I laughed quietly, "Do you mean to ask me to a dance, Admiral Onasi?"_

_He exhaled quietly. "Yes, yes I believe I do."_

"_I don't know…" I said, "I mean, what would I wear?" I asked teasingly, and glanced around the store._

_He glanced around also, then grabbed a dress from a nearby rack. "Wear this."_

_I laughed, looking at the garment, "Carth, that's a cocktail dress, not a ball gown." I went to the back of the store, and picked up one of my favorite designs. It was floor length, and a deep rich purple. It flowed out at the bottom, narrowing at the waist and was strapless. "This, is a gown." he nodded appreciatively and I grabbed a pair of sparkly heals and the gloves to match. "Give me a sec, and I'll change."_

_I went to the back room, changing into the dress and began to put on my makeup. I put my hair up in a bum, and wrapped a thin purple scarf around it, as was tariasian custom. It took me about a half an hour, and when I finally emerged the sun was beginning to set. _

"_Are you ready to go?" I asked him, and he stared at me speechless. I smiled and did a dramatic turn to show off the rest of the dress._

"_That dress was made for you." he said, taking my arm and leading me out to the speeder._

"_Well no duh, I made it."_

_We went to the Republic embassy, arriving fashionably late. We were seated by a young private, looking scared out of his wits. I received a lot of looks, some for my dress, most for being on the arm of Carth Onasi. We ate dinner together at a table of higher ups, them talking about outer rim politics on planets I had never even heard of. Then the speeches came, from overweight officials kissing up to the people in charge. Finally the band started and the room took on a more festive mood, rather than the meeting it felt like. _

"_Lets dance." I said, turning to Carth._

"_Excuse me?" he coughed, choking on his drink a little. "Dance?"_

"_Yeah, you know, when two people go out on a dance floor together and move in rhythm. __Its actually a lot of fun."_

_He still looked reluctant, so I grabbed his arm and led him out onto the floor. I placed his hand on my waist, and took his other in my other. I felt for a beat, than began to count, nudging his feet into the correct position. "One two three, one two three…" I said, concentrating on the music. He pulled with his left hand, spinning me around in a circle, then dipping me. Gasping in surprise, I pulled myself back into an upright position. _

"_What was that?" I asked him, stopping._

"_That was a dip, and I would appreciate it if you would let me lead." he smirked at me, then began dancing again. It was a traditional waltz, and he led me through every step flawlessly. We danced and we twirled the night away until blisters appeared on my feet and my dress began to wrinkle. With the music still playing in the background, he led me out to an abandoned balcony and sat me on a stone bench._

"_Well tonight was wonderful. Thank you for inviting me, even with the short notice." I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. Not wanting to pull away, I hesitated by him, breathing him in. he turned his masculine face toward mine, and placed his lips upon mine. We kissed, and it was like the fire and ice, night and day, all rolled into one. We broke apart and I felt his breath on my lips._

"_I love you. And I understand if you don't feel that way, or your not ready to say it back, but its still true." I said, and waited fearfully for his answer. _

"_I love you too." he said, and kissed me again._

I was walking down the street, just enjoying the day, my acquirements tucked under my arm. I turned down an alley way to take the short way home, and nearly stumbled upon a dead body.

"Ahh!" I shrieked, stepping back from the bloody mess. I stared on in horror, the mans throat appearing to be cut.

"Ahh, relax. It's a sith, no need to shed any tears." I turned to the voice, and found another nightmare. It was the woman from the wedding, only cut and bloodied.

"Oh my… your Rev- I mean Lola!" she studied my face again, this time with a hint of recognition.

"And you're his wife. Congrats, by the way." Her eyes were shining, from tears or light I didn't know.

"Umm, yes…thank you." I paused, and shuffled my feet, glancing down at the recently deceased. "And who is this?"

"He is a sith assassin. Somehow they found out I was here, and he managed to infiltrate Republic airspace. I'm just happy there wasn't more of them."

"He tried to kill you? Why?"

She rolled her eyes. "Because I'm about to tell the Republic that they are going to attack, and they are going to loose the element of surprise."

I blinked, hard. "Another war?"

She nodded, dismayed. "I'm afraid so."

We stood silently for a second, me comprehending the thought of another war, so soon after the others. I glanced at her through my eyelashes, and saw her daintily wipe her hand across her face, wincing when she passed over a wound.

"The authorities have been called right?" she nodded and I continued, "Then its going to take them a long while to process the scene. You can come home with me, and I'll clean your wounds."

"No thanks," she started, "I'm fine." She tried to stand from where she was sitting, but after placing weight on one of her ankles she yelped and fell back down. I grabbed her arm and caught her before she hit the ground, and gently helped her back up.

"Come on, its not that far from here." She reluctantly wrapped her arm around my shoulders and I helped her to my apartment door, helping her sit in a chair in the kitchen. I went to the sink and heated up some water, glancing back at her from time to time.

"So… your Carth's wife…" she said quietly. I turned to face her, nodding softly.

"Not officially, no. We were supposed to get married yesterday but…" I trailed off.

"You love him?" it was a question, but not the one I could tell she was dying to ask.

"I do… " I waited for her to finish.

"And he… and he is in love too?"

"He is…" I paused, "To his work. His eats, breathes, and lives the Republic. I hardly ever see him."

"I loved him you know, more than anything in the world." She finally looked at me.

"I know."

"Did he…" she swallowed hard, and turned away again. "Did he ever try to find me?"

"No." I said softly, but I didn't tell her the reason why. I didn't tell her he never looked for her because he thought she was dead. And i didn't tell hr why he thought that.

I pulled a kolto cloth out of the medicine cabinet, and went to where she was sitting. She held her hand open for the healing cloth, and I handed it to her. She wet it in the water, and began to wipe her face with it, bandaging the more severe wounds. Something occurred to me, and I turned to ask her.

"You're a Jedi right? I thought you could use the Force to heal wounds?"

She continued her methodical grooming. "Normally I could, but when I was fighting him, something strange happened. I couldn't feel the Force, it was just an empty chasm."

She shrugged indifferently, and laid the red cloth in the bowl of water and took it to the sink.

"Why did you come back?" I asked her.

She didn't turn around, "To warn the Republic about the sith." She said shortly.

"Is that all?" I asked before I could stop myself.

She paused, still with her back to me, "I also came to Telos because…because I wanted to tell Carth how sorry I was for leaving him like that. And because I wanted to see how he was changed, or if he remained the same."

"Has he changed from when you knew him?"

"He has. In a way, he's much like the way he was when I first met him. Untrusting, cold, calculating. But I only talked to him for a short time…"

"You mean at the wedding?" I interrupted.

"Yes…at the wedding. My leaving left its mark upon both of us, and I suppose that's for the better. Now, if you excuse me, I'm sure the investigators are probably looking for me by now."

I nodded and she showed herself out. So that was Revan. She seemed different than I expected, she seemed…worn somehow. As if she had seen to much, done to much for a woman of her age.

Bastila- Revan had been on Citadel station for two days, and the Republic was already calling in an emergency meeting? Not willing to miss being a part of this, I called in every favor from the Republic to guarantee a seat. I waited outside the meeting hall for her, anxious to find out what was going on.

"Bastila!" called a voice from the past. I turned and smiled, despite my JedI peace.

"Revan! It is good to see you alive and here, although I cant say in perfect health, what happened to you?" I said, finally noticing the fresh marks upon her skin.

"Oh these?" she questioned self consciously, "Its part of the reason I am here. I was attacked by a sith assassin yesterday."

"A sith assassin? Revan, do you know what this means?"

She nodded, "I have known for a while. As you know, that's why I went to the outer rim, and obviously, they were too powerful for me to take care of by myself. But I managed to buy the Republic some time, allow them to lick their wounds."

"But Revan, why not allow the Force to heal you?" I asked her, confused.

"Because, and you'll understand this more than any Republic admiral. When I fought the assassin off, I lost all contact with the Force, it was just…gone. I've done some thinking, and when I was attacked, my emotions were out of wack, and I must have transmitted my position through the Force. That must be how he managed to find me so easy. I don't want any repeat scenes, so I'm cutting myself off from the Force, at least temporarily."

Cutting oneself off from the Force? "But Revan, how can you stand it?"

She shrugged, "Guess I have to." she glanced over her shoulder, "Speaking of which, the meeting is about to start. Go in and have a seat, we'll talk more later."

I nodded my consent, and walked through the doors, taking a seat by an captain. While I waited, I thought about the first time I met her.

_I wanted to go home. I missed my daddy, when they told me I could be a jedI, I thought daddy would be coming with me. The ship ride was really fun, but now I was alone, and scared, and crying._

"_Oh Alek look, a new recruit." said a kind voice, "Hello little girl, what's your name?"_

_I looked up at the girl. She was older than me, and was wearing some kind of robe thing. "B-Bastila," I hiccupped from crying._

"_Hi Bastila, I'm Revan, and this is my friend Alek." I looked over at the boy. I didn't like boys, they were mean and called me names because I could move stuff with my mind._

"_Hi." said Alek, "How old are you?"_

"_I'm five," I said, scrunching back even farther into a corner. "Your not gonna call me names, are you?"_

_They looked at each other funny, "Now why would I do that?" he asked, sitting down next to me._

"_Because all the boys in my home-world made fun of me and called me names cause I could do stuff they couldn't, like move things with out touching it."_

_The girl sat down on the other side of me and held my hand. "Ahh, I see. I was often made fun of for the very same things. But that wont happen here, you know why?"_

"_Why?"_

"_Because here, your rewarded for special things you do. You should be proud of your gift, and use it to help others. Wanna see something?" said Alek._

_I nodded mutely, and he held out his hand toward the gardens. An invisible hand plucked a flower, and it floated to his hand and he caught it and offered it to me. "Here you go," he said._

_The girl scoffed. "I can do better, watch this!" she closed her eyes, and was still for a few moments. I saw her smile a bit, and then Alek was lifted in the air and started spinning in circles! _

"_Put-Me-Down!" he yelled. He fell with a thump, and we started laughing._

"_Again! Again!" I cried, still giggling._

"_No! Not again!" yelled Alek, and glared at Revan. _

"_Teach me too do that!" I said, looking at Revan. She made a face, then shook her head._

"_I think Alek might be getting dizzy. Besides, you've done the best trick of all." she said._

"_I have?" I asked wonderingly. _

"_Yep! You've traveled all the way across the whole galaxy! And I think that deserves… ice cream!"_

"_Yay!" I shrieked, "Ice Cream!" I grabbed both of their hands and we all ran to the main hold, and I wanted globsberry._

The meeting room was large, created in a circle so everyone could hear the speaker in the middle. Only some of the desks were filled, most were left vacant as the senators and admirals belonging to them were off planet. I sat in between an admiral and a captain, and waited for the meeting to begin.

"Do you know what this is about?" the captain on my left asked.

I turned to him, "I have some idea, but I am not aware of the details." He looked like he was going to ask more, but a commotion behind us startled our awareness. I knew it was Revan from her presence in the Force, but I still turned to see who was with her.

She was wearing plain smuggler clothes; I never could get her to dress up for these things. There was a cut under her eye, and her nose looked broken and swollen. "Hello, Revan. You always did know how to make an entrance." Said the Governess of the Republic embassy on Telos. She looked at her disapprovingly, they never had gotten along.

"Yes well, I'll try to make as big an impact with my words as with my appearance, considering its part of the reason I am here." She walked to the front the room, standing by the podium set aside for admirals. The governess glared at her, but sat down at an empty desk.

"Well, since you are all staring at my face, let's start with that. Last night after speaking with Admiral Onasi," All eyes turned to him, and Carth pointedly trained his eyes on Revan. "I was attacked, by a sith assassin."

Understandably the room collapsed into disorder, some shouting their disbelief, saying that the sith had been defeated years ago. Others gasped aloud, searching for answers from the people sitting near them. Revan waited patiently until a semblance of order had been restored.

"As I said, a sith assassin. The republic has his corpse, take it up with them if you don't believe me."

Everybody turned to the governess, who flushed a deep pink. "It's true," she said painfully.

"Good, now that you all believe that the sith are truly back, perhaps you will all behave reasonably." Revan started again but was interrupted.

"How do we know that the sith are truly back? Perhaps this was just a freak occurrence, a mercenary or some veteran sith acting on his own?" questioned a young admiral from the front row.

"Or perhaps not…" I saw Revan mouth before addressing the man. "When I was Revan, I went to the outer rim to defeat the Mandalorians, because the Republic was losing. When we got there, we found them, especially on Malachor. True sith, not the ones you believe you defeated. They captured most of the Jedi who followed me there, the Jedi who were believed to be lost in the battle. When I found out about this, I sought out the star forge, hoping to unite the galaxy against this new threat. Then I was captured, and all memories of these enemies disappeared, until a while ago. After the Jedi civil war, the Republic was weak, so I left to the outer rim, hoping I could destroy this evil by myself. That was… optimistic of me."

She waited, and the room fell on baited breath. The thought of another war, so soon after the others, was not a pretty thought. I felt what every admiral in the room was feeling, the low morale of the galaxy, the scarcity of supplies, even the low numbers of soldiers. If what Revan was saying was true, the galaxy was in for a hard time.

"How long until they get here?" asked one of the admirals. I noticed dryly that the question was if, and not when. They were finally believing her.

"I believe a few months, give or take. They have ships, and they have troops, and they have supplies. And they are strong."

The governess addressed her. "You seem like you have a plan on how to defeat them. I hope it is a good one."

Revan seemed hesitant to answer her question. "These sith, they are unlike ones I have ever fought before. They use holes in the Force, or places drenched with the dark side to turn Jedi to their cause. To have the Force taken from them like that… you cant imagine what that feels like." She paused. "If these sith are allowed to conquer the galaxy, they could change any place into these… black holes. That would mean for centuries to come, any Force user would fall immediately to the dark side. I believe, if we could rebuild the Jedi council, we could fight Force users with Force users, and have a fighting chance to-"

She never got to finish before a female Admiral interrupted her. "Unthinkable! Do you not remember what happened the last time we fought alongside with Force users? They turned on us, and began a whole new war! If we allow you to rebuild the Jedi council, we will be dooming ourselves to another war!"

Revan was quite when she answered. "And if you do not allow me too, you will be doomed, to loose."

A lieutenant spoke up. "But what of these black holes you speak of? If you rebuild the Jedi council, would not the new Jedi fall?"

"I am not proposing to train new Jedi, but merely to reunite the existing ones. I have knowledge of where the old Masters are hiding, and there would be less chance of them to fall."

The lieutenant answered her. "But more of a risk! If these Masters fall, then we would be putting ourselves up against them!"

The governess spoke. "As ironic as it is, Jedi Revan, I do agree with you. I have seen too many soldiers fall against the dark users. I believe these Masters would be more of a help, than a hindrance. That being said, I do not wish to allow this to happen without Republic interference. I will allow you to rebuild your council, but on this mission, I wish you to take Admiral Carth Onasi with you. You worked well together on your mission to the star forge, and he is the best pilot I have, which you will need. Meeting adjourned."

"Wait!" Revan yelled, holding her hands out. "You cant send him with me!"

"Oh cant I?" said the governess, already packing up her things, "I need somebody from the Republic on your ship, somebody I trust, and an Admiral would be best. That being said, because admiral Onasi ordered this meeting, he seems to know the most about the new sith. You have worked well in the past, what's the problem now?"

"You might call it, a personal problem, governess, you see I-" Carth was interrupted.

"Its an order, Onasi. I expect full detailed reports every week, and check ins at least every other day. You've worked with the council before, I'm counting on you to make sure this doesn't fail." with that she walked out of the mostly empty room.

"Okay, I don't care what she says, your not coming with me." said Revan.

"I have too." Carth said tight lipped. He raised his voice when Revan went to answer. "It was a direct order, I cant disobey."

"Well she ordered you to obey me, so I can now officially order you to stay here. Good bye now." she walked around him, grabbing my arm and pulling me with her.

"I'll arrange to have the _Ebon Hawk_ fueled and reloaded with supplies." Carth called after us. She didn't answer, but dragged me right out the door.

"Honestly Revan, I would have followed you, you didn't have to drag me."

"Hi Bastila. Wow Revan, your seriously ordering Carth to stay here?" Mission said behind me. I yelped a tad, then turned to see her shimmer into existence.

"Shesh, Mission. If you wanted to come to the meeting, you could have just asked!" Revan berated her.

"More fun this way," she answered. "Come on Lola, your taking me right?"

"I'm not taking anybody!" Revan yelled, starting to walk in the direction of the hangars. "This is my mission, and I'm going to do it by myself."

"Oh come on Lola! It'll be fun!" Mission said excitedly.

"Mission," I said, disproving, "This is a matter of great importance, and is to be treated delicately."

Her eyes grew wide, "You mean your coming too Bas?"

The others looked at me curiously. "Well you didn't think I would allow you to rebuild the Jedi council without me, did you?"

"Great!" Mission chimed, "So that's me, Lols, Bas…""Count me in too." A gruff voice said behind us."And Canderous too!" said Mission, "And of course the Republic is sending Carth with us, and then we can bring hk-47 and T3-M4…"

Lola visibly paled. "No. NO! None of you are coming! This is my mission, Mission."

Mission interrupted her. "There's no way we are going to let you disappear again for the next four years. So either we are coming, or you are staying."

Lola sighed, "Fine. I will go on this stupid mission, with my stupid friends, to save the stupid galaxy, from the stupid sith. Okay?"

"Lola, a Jedi must not use such vulgar words such as 'stupid'." I sniffed.

"Argh! Who's ever coming, get in the ship now, or I'm leaving without you."

"Got room for another old wizened Jedi past his prime?" we turned again to see Jolee limping towards us from down the hall.

"Agrh! Was there anybody not at this meeting?" Revan moaned. We took the transporter and finally got to the _Ebon Hawk's_ hangar, the noticably empty hangar. "Where is my ship?"

"What do you mean? Where did you leave it?" Mission asked from behind me.

"What do you mean where did I leave it? I left it right here!" Revan cried. Canderous and Jolee appeared to be trying to hide behind each other.

"Breath, Revan. It will all be sorted out soon." I reminded her.

She did as I asked. "Okay. Mission, looks like I'll need to spend one more night with you. Canderous, make sure your packed with everything you'll need for the trip. Jolee, hi! How ya been? Long time no see, all that stuff. I swear we'll talk more later, I just…I need a drink."

"Want company?" Canderous asked, and Revan paled again.

"Forget that. I need a fracking bucket." she said and walked away, in the opposite direction of the cantina.

We were all stunned, needing answers, resigned to wait until tomorrow to get them.

I think Jolee summed up all of our thoughts when he said, "Since when does Lola drink?"

**a/n Another chapter so soon? I don't believe it either! **

**Tell me what you think! Did you like Sarah's character? What about the scene with Lola and Revan? Did I manage to pull off Bastila? What do you think about Carth's new orders? Review and let me know!**

**I'm also looking for a beta-reader, send me a message if you'd be interested! **

**Anything you didn't like? Something you wanna see happen in the next chapter? Let me know, I'm open to ideas!**

**-writtenrhythm. **


	5. New Friends, Old Friends

Mission- The dawn came and we rose to meet it. Lola was in the kitchen preparing some tea, while I packed for our adventure. Come hell or high water, I was going with her; my heart was set on that fact.

"Okay let's see," I mumbled to myself, "I need my blaster, clothes, and my vibroblades. What else?" I examined my suitcase, wondering what I was forgetting.

A knock came at the door, and I turned, "Lola, will you get that?" I called, and heard her grudging reply.

"Oh…its you. Is Mission here?" I heard Dustil's voice ask, and I called out to answer him.

"In here Dustil." I said, and walked out to him, and gave him a hug.

"Hey. I was just wondering if you wanted to go out for brunch, but if you're busy…" he trailed off.

"I can't. Someone stole the _Ebon Hawk_ and I have to help find it."

"Oh don't mind me Mission, go out. I have to talk to the Republic to see if they can track it." Lola called around a mouthful of pastry.

"Wait-why do you care where the _Ebon Hawk _is?" Dustil asked me, stepping out of my arms.

"As I said, some schutta stole Lola's ship, and we need it to find the Jedi council, so…" I trailed off.

"No." Dustil said shortly, looking angry.

"No what?" I asked him.

"You're not going on the mission, Mission. It's too dangerous."

Lola chuckled, "That's what I've been trying to tell her. But maybe you can get through that thick skull of hers."

We both ignored her, "Dustil, since when have you known me to sit out of something I think important?"

"Never, but Mission, you've got a life here. You're not some street rat from Taris anymore, you have people here relying on you."

"Like who? My boss? I've already called him; he thinks it's a great idea." I walked into the kitchen unit and pulled a mug out of the cabinet. "Bottom line Dustil, I'm going."

"Oh yeah? You and what army?" he asked, handing me the sugar for my tea.

"Everyone." I said, at the same time Lola said "No one."

He looked between us, confused at the opposite ends of the conversation. "Okay… who else _thinks_ they are going?"

Lola sighed, and refilled her mug. "A demented old hermit, a stuck up ex-Jedi princess, and a blue street rat who invited herself along. And of course you can't forget about a bloodthirsty Mandalore, an assassin droid, and a beeping tin can. All of who managed to dement themselves into thinking that I wanted them along."

"You forgot the paranoid Republic Admiral." I told her.

"What Admiral?" Dustil asked harshly.

"Umm…well….you see…" Oops. I thought Carth would have already told him.

"He is _not_ coming along." said Lola, glaring at me.

"What. Admiral." Dustil repeated, his teeth clenched.

"The Governess wants someone from the Republic along for this mission. She picked Carth because of their history together at the Star Forge."

He glared at Lola, "So your gonna take him away again, are you?"

I was shocked, "Dustil, what?" I trailed off.

He ignored me, and spoke only to Lola, **"**He's got a life now, and he's finally over you. And now here you come to drag him off into the corners of the galaxy. Is there anything safe from you? Do you destroy everything you come into contact with? Marriages, families, planets…is nothing sacred to you?"

We stood in shock, silence encasing the room. Lola looked especially hurt. She stared wide-eyed at Dustil, who was breathing heavily.

"You took him away from me in the Jedi civil war, you took him away from me when you left, and if you take him away from me again, I will never forgive you." With that he left, the door slamming shut behind him.

Lola appeared to be in shock. She sat down heavily on a nearby chair, still staring in the direction he went. "I…I didn't know he felt that way." she said numbly.

"Hey," I said softly, sitting down next to her, "You know Dustil, he's a hothead. He's just trying to take all this in. He'll come around."

She nodded absentmindedly, thinking about something. "Mission, what happened when I left? I mean to Carth…how bad was it?"

I sighed, and searched her face. This was a conversation I never wanted to have. She didn't need the guilt. I got up and retrieved my mug from the counter, walking slowly to hold off the inevitable. "Are you sure you want to know? Its not….its not a happy story."

She nodded again. "I have to know."

I settled into the couch, and took a breath before beginning. "When you first left, things were really bad…"

_Their house was a tomb. It was as if everything, even the air, knew she was gone. I had tried calling, visiting at work but he never opened the door to anyone anymore. I was worried, about just how deeply into depression he had fallen. I made up my mind; he was going to let me in today even if I had to pick the lock. _

_I turned down his street, adjusting my package. I had picked up some food, I didn't think he had been eating. I looked down to adjust it, my feet automatically turning into his sidewalk. I was halfway to the door, before I noticed it was wide open, held that way by an overturned flower pot._

"_Carth?" I called, gingerly stepping into the room. "Carth, where are you?" The house was a mess; the table was flipped over, spilling papers and trash on the barely visible carpet. A light was flickering over the sink, while the curtains were tightly drawn. I tripped over an empty whiskey bottle in my pursuit of the Admiral. _

"_Carth?" I yelled, walking down the hallway to his bed room. His bedroom door was open, and all I could hear was the sound of my voice ringing in my ears. All I could see from my vantage point was the barrel of a blaster, and a bare foot. "Carth!" I screamed, and sprinted the rest of the way. _

_He was sitting in the doorway of his room, one leg jutted out while the other was bent, supporting his head. He was shirtless, and smelled of booze. "Carth?" I asked, worried, "Carth, what's wrong?"_

_I stepped over the blaster pistol, lightly nudging it out of the way with my heel. I sat down next to him on the floor and pushed away the bottle of alderan brandy. From the looks of him, he had enough to drink._

"_Carth, are you okay?" I waited for a response, and when none came, I placed my hand on his arm, "Carth, please talk to me."_

_He didn't move, just sat there curled into himself. I waited for a minute or two, but he remained silent. I used my hand to shake him slightly. He sighed and raised his head, his eyes blurry and red rimmed, from lack of sleep and alcohol._

"_Mission." he said, using my name as a curse. "Should have known you'd show up sooner or later."_

"_Well I took notice when you dropped off the face of the planet. We're worried about you Carth…"_

"_Yeah? Well…don't be." he said shortly. _

"_But Carth, you don't talk to anyone anymore. I talked to Bastila and she said as soon as you go to the embassy you lock yourself in your office and don't come out until late. You don't answer Dustil's calls; Jolee has seen you at the cantina almost every night. It's like you don't give a damn about anything anymore."_

"_So?" he said, standing up, "What if I don't?" he got up, stumbling a bit as he headed to the only window, "I would give my life in a second for you, for any of you. I would do anything for you, and you know that. But don't come around here thinking you know me. You don't know me, you can't fathom…" he stopped, choking up._

_I stood up but stayed where I was, "Then tell me."_

"_There's just this... emptiness where she used to be. I miss her. Oh Force how I miss her…" he stopped, and his shoulders began shaking. I wanted to do something, anything to take his pain away, but I didn't know how._

"_She's…she's coming back. You can't give up hope. She's out there, somewhere…" I stopped._

"_Yeah, she out there, somewhere. And I would give anything to be with her." With that he left, pushing past me out the door. I stood there for a second, giving him time to compose himself. _

"_Come back, Rev. We need you...he needs you." I whispered, and then followed Carth into the kitchen._

I finished my story, and Lola looked stricken. She had paled, and I could tell she hated herself for putting him through that. "No wonder he hates me." she whispered through numb lips.

I stood up, and dumped my cold caffa out. "I don't think its Carth you have to worry about." I told her.

"What do you mean?" she asked, following me into the kitchen.

"When Carth was having a hard time, Dustil was worried about him; really worried. And Dustil being Dustil, that worry turned to hate, and he blamed you for Carth's pain," I paused, "Dustil's a good guy, but once he wraps his brain around something, it'll take a miracle to change it. And he's got his mind pretty much made up about you."

"Great. So now I've got to worry about pretty pilot and sith boy sticking a vibrosword in my back." she sighed, and looked more worried than her words showed, "But whatever. I've got to find the _Ebon Hawk,_ wanna help?"

A few seconds later we opened to door to a startled Jolee. "Oh! Umm…hey." he grumbled in surprise, "Lola here?"

She walked up from behind me. "Hey old man. How's it going?" she stepped out and I locked the door behind us.

"Heard you were going to save the galaxy-again. That's not something you see very often twice in a lifetime, let alone three times. You don't think I'm going to let you do this alone, do you now?"

Lola laughed, and started walking down the walk way, gesturing for us to follow. "Of course not, that is, if you can stay awake for the ride. I was heading down to the embassy, if you'd like to come along?"

"Do I look like I want to run all over the damned planet with you?" he gruffed, but walked contently at Lola's side. "So. Four years is a long time away. Guess I don't get to hear any wild tales now, do I?"

"Wild tales? Do I seem like the kind of uptight stuck-up bossy Jedi who would galvanize the galaxy in such a way?" she sniffed, and stuck her nose up in the air.

"You better watch where you're walking and get your head out of the clouds before some wrinkled old coot comes along and trips you." they laughed together and Lola answered his question.

"There was something out on the outer rim, something powerful. I went to stop it." she shrugged, "Nothing much else to tell."

"Aw come now. No fist fights with death? No looking fear in the eyes and spitting at it? None of that?"

"Well…there was this one time when I threatened to sell HK-47 for scrap, but other than that…" she joked as we reached the compound. I saw the secretary glance up at us, and her eyes grew wide with fear.

"Um…Admiral Onasi won't be in for a few minutes ma'am, if you'd like to wait?" she stuttered, clumsily shuffling the papers on her desk.

"Oh that's all right, I'm not here to see him again, and I need information about a stolen ship. My ship."

Jolee looked at me in confusion, whispering furtively in my ear, "How do these two know each other?"

Before I could answer, the door opened behind us and I turned out of habit. "Hello Carth!" I heard Jolee exclaim, "Fancy meeting you here!"

I turned to see Lola's reaction, her back had gone stiff with tension and her hands were clenched into fists. The secretary squeaked, and stood up quickly. "I'm taking a caffa break!" I heard her say, and then watched her practically run out of the room.

"Hello Jolee, Mission," he paused, "…Lola."

She turned, and a forced smile was upon her face. "Hello Carth. Wouldn't have any information on the _Ebon Hawk_, now would you?"

He nodded, and motioned us down the hallway into his office. "I checked with TSF operatives, it seems that the ship never left Telos' atmosphere. It's not sanctioned at any other landing sight planet-side though."

Jolee sat in one of the plush leather chairs, the only one completely at ease. "Well, 2/3 of the planet is uninhabited, so it has to be in one of the shielded zones."

"That means you have an illegal landing sight somewhere. That's my guess." I added.

"Lola nodded, "That also means we need to get down there and check it out. I assume you have a shuttle?" she asked Carth.

"Yes, but it'll take a while to get take-off clearance. We should probably get down there as soon as possible." everyone agreed with Carth, and we left his office together. We walked back to the front lobby, where Dustil waited.

"Dustil?" I called out to him, "What are you doing here?"

"Your neighbor heard you talking about going to the embassy. I figured I could find you here." He paused, and looked anxiously over at Lola and Carth, "I don't suppose we could talk in private?"

"You two go ahead. I'll com you when its time to go." Carth said, and their trio walked to the hangars.

"Dustil? What's wrong?" he looked at me, the shook his head, motioning me back down the hallway into his father's office.

"Mission, I don't want you to go with her." he said shortly, closing the door behind him.

"We've been over this and-"

"I know we've been over this!" he shouted angrily, "The problem is that you're not listening!"

He was angry, his eyes blazing and his breathing rapid. It was times like these when he honestly scared me a little, the sith in him showing through. "Dustil, just listen to me…" I started.

"You need to listen to me!" he said through gritted teeth, "It's too dangerous, I don't trust you alone with Revan…"

"Revan?" I questioned, shocked, "Dustil, she's not Revan! She's Lola!""She's been gone for four years! She's not you old pal from the Star Forge mission! You don't know her, not anymore."

"She's my friend! I'm going to help her, and that's that." With that I started out of the room, reaching for the button to open the door. His hand reached out and grabbed my arm.

"We're not finished." He glared at me, his fingers laying bruises on my skin. He looked angrier than I've ever seen him, eyes narrowed and teeth clenched.

"Dustil, what are you doing? Let go of me!" I yanked my arm out of his grasp and stepped back horrified. "Don't you touch me like that ever again!"

He looked like he was about to start yelling again but he closed his eyes and took a deep breath through his nose. "I'm sorry. Just Mission, I'm worried about you."

I sighed, and played with my vest's zipper. "You don't have to be. I can take care of myself. I'm not a little kid anymore."

He smiled, but still looked ashamed. "As I remember it, you never were a little kid."

"_Dustil, are you sure this is safe?" I hesitated at the edge of the cave, glancing behind me to make sure Lola wasn't going to come screaming and yelling at me down the hill._

"_It's fine. I do it with my friends all the time. That is, unless you're scared?" he grinned at me, a dare upon his face. _

_I frowned at him but followed him into the darkness. We were still on Korriban and were waiting for Lola to receive the star map. We only had two more to go, this one and the one on Manaan. There was a cave Dustil invited me to outside the academy entrance. _

"_Dustil, I don't like this."_

"_Come on. Shesh, I wouldn't have invited you if I knew you were going to complain all the time. I thought you grew up on the streets of Taris, one little old cave shouldn't scare you."_

"_Whatever." I mumbled and followed him deeper into the darkness. Water was dripping somewhere in the distance, and a terrantatek roared deeper into the cave. The whole thing was creepy, and only Dustil could have convinced me to come. The path he went down twisted and turned me only catching sight of him for a second before he disappeared again. He sped up, ducking and dodging hanging boulders and rocks. Soon he left my sight, and I tried to follow him, but there were a variety of tunnels he could have gone down, all leading to a different place._

"_Dustil?" I called, listening closely for a response. I felt cold when none came. "Dustil, this isn't funny. I want to go back to the academy." I still couldn't hear him. The dripping of water increased in frequency, and the terrantatek roared again, this time a lot closer. I wrapped my arms around myself, starting to get cold. I pulled out my comlink and started shining it down the tunnels, hoping to see where he had gone down. I aimed the light down the tunnel in front of me and squinted my eyes to see as much as I could. Something glinted white, and I heard snarling. I stepped forward to see what it was. The Terrantatek! I dropped the comlink and sprinted down the corridor to my left. I heard its claws scraping the rock behind me and I sped up. I ran for all I was worth, until I couldn't hear its growling over my panting. I slowed, and waited for my breath to return to normal. _

_I looked around, as much as I could in the low light. It was then it hit me I had no idea where I was. "Shavit," I whispered to nobody. I took a few steps to nowhere, desperately looking for a way out. _

"_Dustil!" I yelled as loud as I could, but only the echo of my voice came back to me. I remembered Carth telling me on Kashyyyk that if I got lost, to hug a tree. "Thousands of people die because they start wandering. Hug a tree, and I'll come running to you." I whispered his words for comfort and sat on the cold stone ground. "I did my part, I'm hugging my tree. Now Carth, you come find me," I hung my head and aloud a single tear to escape. "Please, anyone find me."_

_I distracted myself from the terror by counting my breaths, and when I reached ten thousand I switched to my heartbeats. _

"_Three thousand eight hundred sixty seven, three thousand eight hundred sixty eight…" I whispered to myself. Finally I heard something faint in the background; it almost seemed like a voice. I stopped counting and listened closer. _

"_Mission!" a faint voice yelled. I stood up and ran towards the voice._

"_Help!" I screamed, sprinting down the corridor. _

_I continued shouting until I saw a single beam of light meet my face. I blinked against the darkness and slowed to a stop._

"_Mission!" I heard Dustil's voice shout and the light fell to the ground._

"_Dustil! You were going so fast and there was a terrantatek and I ran but then I was lost so I hugged my tree and I…" I kept babbling until he captured me in his arms._

"_Thank the Force you're alright." he whispered in my ear, holding me tight against him. "I was so worried, I-" He interrupted himself, stopping in the midst of his sentence. His face grew harder and he let go me. "Now come on, let's get out of here." he grabbed my hand and the light and led me down a trail. He seemed to be brooding about something, a storm crossing his face that became darker the longer we walked. Finally I could see the sunlight streaming in from the entrance, and I jogged toward the promised freedom. _

"_We made it!" I yelled and ran out of the cave, basking in the warmth of the desert._

"_Yeah, now maybe I won't have to baby-sit you anymore." Dustil said bitterly, kicking the sand._

_I blinked in shock at the venom in his voice, "What do you mean by that?"_

_He glared at me, "What I mean is, I don't need friends that are young enough and stupid enough to get lost in a fracking cave!" he exploded at me._

"_I'm not a kid!" I yelled at him, hurt by his accusation._

"_My bad. I thought you could handle exploring a cave. Guess the only thing you'll ever be good at is table dancing in a cantina!" _

"_You-you nerf-herding core slime!" I yelled at him, tears stinging my eyes._

"_Table dancing schutta!"_

"_Least I don't smell like a Gammorean!"_

"_Least I'm taller than a Ja-wa!"_

"_Least I'm not a sith!" I screamed, about ready to smack him. His teeth were gritted together, and it took me a second to realize it wasn't out of anger. Pain and worry glinted in his eyes._

"_I'm not a sith." he whispered, pain coloring his voice._

_I blinked back tears, ashamed of what I had said, "I'm sorry Dustil." I whispered._

_He shuffled his feet, embarrassed, "Yeah well…me too." With that he strode past me, thought twice and turned back towards me. Before I could turn back, he pressed his lips to my cheek. "I'll see you later." He said, and then jogged back up to the academy. I stood there frozen, my hand pressed over the kiss._

"_You…you stupid boy!" I whispered after him. How dare he confuse me like that! "You stupid sith!" My cheeks burned a bright purple, and I skipped up to the academy, completely ignoring the smile on my face._

I smirked a little at the memory, but quickly remembered the argument. "I'm still going Dustil."

He frowned again, "Mission, it's too dangerous! I-"

I cut him off, "If it's so dangerous, why don't you come and protect me?" I meant it as a joke, but he seemed to think about it seriously.

"That's not a bad idea. Then I could keep an eye on Revan…"

"Dustil, you know this isn't necessary, I was just joking. You don't need to come…"

He shook his head, "Nope. I'm coming too. Shouldn't be too hard. Go round up a couple of stodgy Jedi, almost sounds like fun."

"Dustil, no! It's too dangerous, I don't want you to get hurt!" I yelled at him.

He shot me that heart stopping grin of his, "Using my own argument against me? It's not going to work, 'I've got my heart set on this'."

I glared at him, but when I opened my mouth the comlink chimed. Carth's face flooded the screen. "You two might want to get down here, the shuttles ready."

"We'll be right there." I told him, then hit the power button. I stuck my finger in Dustil's face. "We'll talk about this later." He smiled boyishly at me again, then winked at me cockily. I groaned and exited the office, Dustil following behind me.

Carth's POV- "The shuttle is ready, Admiral. You may depart at anytime." I saluted the young sergeant, and he marched out of the hanger.

"The rest of you heard that. The sooner we get planet side, the better. Let's move out." I said to the group behind me, then turned on my heel and opened the back hatch for the gleaming shuttle. I automatically captured the captain's chair and started punching in take-off codes. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Lola start for the Co-pilots chair, freeze, and then take a passenger seat at the back of the shuttle.

"Jolee, I could use some help up here." I called to the old man.

He harrumphed, then scolded me, "Haven't I earned a little down time? Get someone else to fly this damn thing!" He sat down in the chair behind me, muttering crossly.

I sighed, "Lola? Would you mind?" I didn't look behind me, but I heard her shocked reply.

"Me? Um…sure." A few seconds later she joined me, and began checking the life-support systems. We worked together in silence, until the shuttle was in the air and headed for Telos.

"So how long is this ride anyway?" Mission asked behind me.

_Not long enough,_ I thought, glancing at the woman sitting next to me. I mentally shook myself, and then answered her. "About an hour, more or less." I concentrated on the mundane task of flying, and silence lapped over us. Unfortunately, it gave me too much time to think. It had been awhile since I had Lola in my co-pilots chair, and it was a good feeling. It felt right somehow, although that scared me. I was hyperaware of her presence, anything she did, every time she moved I examined her. She looked good, although sadder than the last time I saw her. The light in her eyes had dimmed, and she had a melancholy about her movements. Something she saw, something she did on the outer rim had changed her. I wasn't sure if that was for the better.

"Oh wow," Mission said, "Its so pretty!"

I grimly disagreed with her. The restored sights had their own beauty to them, but it was nothing compared to what Telos was like before the bombings. "If you think its pretty now, you should have seen it-" A violent shaking of the shuttle interrupted me. "What the frack?"

The console in front of me exploded into flashing lights and alarms blared in my ears. The change of circumstances left my head reeling, but years of piloting under pressure kicked in. I examined one of the screens in front of me. It showed a detailed hologram of the shuttle, the left wing blinking red. "We're being shot at!" Lola yelled, her hands flying over the blinking buttons. We both reached to turn on the shields at the same time, and our hands brushed together. I froze, the smoothness of her skin on my callous hand surprising me. That was one of the things I always loved about her, no matter how hard the going got, one touch from her calmed my fears.

"Watch out!" Dustil yelled, jerking me out of my stupor. I stared out the front window, the ground approaching way to fast.

"Hold on!" I managed to yell, before everything exploded into a firestorm in front of me.

"_Just die already!" I yelled at the sith I was fighting. Finally with a lucky shot he fell to the ground and I opened the door to the escape pods. There was only one left, hopefully the others had made it to Taris's surface. I heard shots coming from the other door, and as much as I wanted to get off of this doomed ship, I couldn't leave behind a fellow Republic soldier. I took cover behind a wall and prepared to open the door. Before I pressed a button the lights flickered due to a power surge. Sparks flew out from under the door and I heard groaning from the other side._

_I opened the door to a woman pick-pocketing the dead sith. An entire battalion were covered in electrical burns. That must have been the power surge, and a quick glance to the overloaded consol confirmed it. I holstered my blaster, than held out a hand to help her up._

"_You made it just in time. There's only one active escape pod left, we can escape to the planet below. Lets go!" I said when she looked at me suspiciously. _

"_How do I know I can trust you?" She said, ignoring my hand and standing up by herself._

_I smirked at the irony of her words. "I'm Captain Carth Onasi with the Republic fleet, and right now you don't have much of a choice. This ships about to blow once the sith find out Bastila's not on board. Now either get in the escape pod or stay here, your choice."_

_She shot me one more suspicious glance, then crawled into the pod. I crawled in after her and pressed the eject button. _

"_Damn. How do these things work?" She cursed after a few minutes of tangling with her safety straps. _

_I checked mine again, making sure they were snug. "Here. Let me do it." I leaned forward and untwisted the straps. "Didn't they cover this in basic training?" I asked her._

"_I didn't really have time to be…what is that?" She shouted._

_I peered through the small navigation window and cursed. "That's a meteor. I'll try to steer us around it, but at these speeds…" I twisted around to reach the consol, and she went back to fiddling with her safety straps._

_I tried to change the course of impact, but at high speeds there wasn't enough time to change the angle fast enough. We clipped the meteor, sending us into a tailspin. I tried to straighten us out, but the heat of the planets atmosphere short circuited the controls. "Hold on!" I yelled to the woman, shocked to see she still didn't have her straps on. We skimmed the planets surface, crashing into a plasteel sidewalk. I pulled on the door release catch, breathing a sigh of release when it opened. _

_I pulled myself out of the wreck, coughing thanks to the dust cloud. I opened a pocket on my jacket and pulled out a flashlight. I shined it into the escape pod, cursing when I saw a pool of blood. I debated on whether to move her or not, but the rising sun and screeching sirens made up my mind. I gently picked her up, careful not to move her head to much. In the rising light I saw a lone ithorian standing by an entrance to a rundown apartment complex. I walked behind him into it, and followed him down the deserted hallways to an apartment door. He vanished behind a corner, so I kicked open the door and quickly vanished into it. I laid the woman in my arms down on a mattress in the corner, then began bandaging her wounds with the few medpacs I had. Finally I stitched shut her last cut, and treated the worst of her scrapes. I took off my orange jacket and covered her with it; the apartment didn't have heat. I sat back in a nearby chair, my blaster on my lap and pointed at her._

We were thrown from the cabin, some by a number of feet. I groaned and clutched my pounding head. I felt Lola's presence near me, and I looked at her. She was up already, and came toward me to heal my wounds with the Force. She silently turned away, healing the rest of the group.

"Jeez Carth! I thought you still knew how to fly!" Mission cajoled me as she dusted herself off.

"You're welcome Mission." I told her, "You know, if I wasn't such a crack pilot, we could we could have hit the shield walls or one of those rock faces."

"Yes, our current situation is a vast improvement." Jolee said, and we all laughed.

A footstep interrupted us, and we all drew our weapons. Mission and I pointed our blasters at a shimmering point about twenty paces away, and the Jedi pulled out their lightsabers'.

"Show yourself." Dustil called, and a Zabrak shimmered into existence.

"Its good to see you again, General." the man said quietly.

"Bao-Dur?" Lola asked, her voice unsure, "Bao-Dur, is that you?"

"Easy now. You survived one heck of a crash. Good thing I was here to pull you out, or you and you companions would be more than a little crispy."

I had no idea who this man was, but it seemed that he wasn't a threat because Lola put away her lightsaber. I followed her lead and holstered my blaster. "Guess I owe you my life again, huh? It's good to see you." Lola said.

"Mind introducing me to your friend, lass?" Jolee asked.

"My name's Bao-Dur. I was one of the Iridonian mechanic corps at Malachor.

"Bao-Dur?" I asked, "Lieutenant Bao-Dur? Weren't you the one who created the Mass Shadow Generator?"

"Yes, but I'd rather not talk about it. I prefer to leave my battles in the past."

I nodded, "Understood. I'm Admiral Carth Onasi with the Republic fleet." I motioned behind me, "This is my son Dustil Onasi, my friend Mission Vao, and the old man back there mumbling to himself is Jolee Bindo."

"Oh, he's got jokes." Jolee said, "Too bad he hasn't realized I could kick his arse ten different ways without laying a finger on him." We all chuckled at the lighthearted banter.

"Enough," Lola said, "We need to know what shot us down, there could be enemies in the area."

"No one's supposed to be here but a Czerka research team. I'd doubt they'd be happy to see us, but shooting at a Republic vessel? That could be considered treason." Mission said worriedly.

Dustil spoke up. "You know, I caught a glimpse of what looked like an air defense tower when we flew over the compound."

"Why would a research station have an air defense tower?" Mission asked.

"Their either really don't like unexpected visitors, or they're doing something they shouldn't be. I've seen pirate bases with the same sort of set-up." Jolee said.

"I say we check it out. We need to find the _Ebon Hawk_." Lola said while gathering some supplies.

"I can help you find it, I have access to the shield network." Bao-Dur paused, "We'll have to get back to the compound. It's the old Ithorian research station, turned into a salvage team staging area. It wont be an easy hike."

"Let me guess, some punk nose kids looking to spoil my whole day, right?" asked Jolee.

Bao-Dur look perplexed, "Well, there's the mercenary pursuit team looking for me. If Czerka's secured the compound, there could be a lot of them out there. And of course there's the Cannoks."

"What's a cannok?" Mission asked him.

"Thei're vicious, wide-jawed predators the Ithorians imported from Dxun. They were meant to keep the herbivore population in check. They overfed, and now they'll eat anything they can catch, including us." I told her while checking my blasters' ammo.

"Forget that. Why is there a mercenary team chasing you?" Lola asked him.

"Look around you. I saw Telos before the Sith razed it. It deserved a better fate. The Ithorians are doing something good here, but Czerka ruined everything. I thought I could force Czerka out on my own, but I guess I cant fix everything myself."

"I think taking on Czerka single-handedly might be a little out of your league." I told him.

"All I wanted to do was send a message, but I couldn't even do that right." he sighed, and I decided I liked him. He seemed like one of the good guys.

"You all are too young to stand around chatting all day. Now my bones hurt and I'm getting tired. I'm gonna go find that damned ship with or without your help." Jolee harrumphed and started off in the direction of the compound.

Lola smiled and started off after him. She still seemed a little on edge, but I guess that was due to my presence. I noticed she kept glancing my way, as if she had something on her mind. Luckily Mission distracted us both.

"So what's that thing bobbing behind you?" she asked Bao-Dur.

"That old thing? I built him when I was a kid. Been following me around for years now, despite what I've done to try and chase him off."

The said droid beeped indignantly, and bumped against Bao-Dur's shoulder.

"Hey, just kidding! I'm happy to have you around."

Mission laughed, "He's cute! Could you build me one?"

"I would, but then I wouldn't be the only one with a floating sphere following him around, and I kind of like that."

Mission nodded, and didn't look put out at all. Sometimes she surprised me with how grown up she was. "So what does it do, other than follow you around?"

"He helps me out with repairs. I outfitted him with a cutting laser and some other tools for delicate modifications. He's also good for singeing the pants of annoying techs." Bao-Dur said, and the remote beeped happily.

Jolee looked thoughtful. "You sure you wont make me one?"

We all laughed, and Dustil looked slightly nervous. "Nah. I've been thinking about doing some other repairs on him, but I've been too busy with the restoration project."

Lola looked at him thoughtfully. "If you don't mind me asking, what happened to your arm?"

He looked at it slightly surprised, as if he forgot about his mechanical arm. "I got tired of it-kept dropping my hydrospanner. Figured I'd get a new one."

Lola cocked an eyebrow. "Yeah? I'll bet that was fun."

Bao-Dur sighed, "Actually, it was a souvenir from Malachor. I was lucky I didn't lose more. But at least it gave me something to do, right? Everyone always said I was probably half machine, anyway."

We settled into a compatible hike, Mission and Dustil arguing about something behind me. Lola, Jolee and Bao-Dur walked ahead of me, chatting about the Mandalorian wars. I heard Lola filling them in on the sith threat on the outer rim. I absentmindedly scanned our surroundings. I noticed something out of place, a branch sticking up out of some tousled dirt. I caught sight of something gleaming, it almost looked like…

"Stop!" I yelled, and out entourage froze. "Look, right there. It's a mine."

"Frack." Lola said, and looked at Mission, "Can you disarm it?"

Mission scoffed, and rolled her eyes, "Unlike the amazing pilot over there, I haven't lost my skills. Watch and learn." She walked over to the mine and set to work. I looked around and saw similar set ups all around us. Somehow, we walked right into the middle of a mine field.

"Nobody move. I count at least ten mines surrounding us."

Bao-Dur followed my sight. "Looks like they guessed where we would be heading. This is the only route to the Complex. This is going to take awhile."

As soon as he finished talking, a group of Czerka mercenaries showed up, climbing over the cliffs. "Well, well, well. Look what we have here. The Jedi. Saves us the trouble of looking for you. Now all of you are going to lay down your weapons, nice and easy, before I start target practice."

Lola glared at them. "Mercenaries. Why shouldn't I be surprised. How about I give you five hundred credits, and you let us go."

The leader scoffed. "How about I just pry them from your cold, dead, corpse." He looked around at our position. "Looks like you fell into our little trap. I was paid to keep everyone out of here, you in particular."

Lola took a nonchalant step forward, placing herself closer to the mercenaries and in front of Mission. "Why, what's down here?"

The leader noticed her movement. "A grenade with your name on it, if you take one more step."

Lola looked as if she was thinking about something. "Fine. We'll come peacefully. Everyone, lay down your weapons."

This had gone to far, "Lola, what-"

She turned and glared at me. "Lay down your weapons, Carth. We can do this without bloodshed." Her eyes had a gleam in them, that meant she had a plan. I nodded and laid my blasters on the ground.

"Put them under constant surveillance. I want no less than 5 guards on each of them, and keep the Jedi separate. I've got plans for her."

They put stun cuffs on us, and led us around the mines, straight into the heart of their base.

**Authors Note- I'm Back! Hoped this chapter was worth the wait! :)**

**So...What do ya think? Whats Dustil planning with Revan? What's Lola's plan to get them out of this? Does Carth still have feelings for her? The world may never know! lol, just kidding. Anything you want to see happen, any flashbacks you wanna read? Review and let me know!**

**Also, a huge shout out to my new beta-rockforthecross74! Thanks so much! :)**


	6. Love Your Enemies, Right?

The mercenary guiding Carth slammed him into a Force cell on the other side of the room. They also brought Mission in, kicking and screaming all the way.

"Turns out we don't have enough cells for all of you. Hope you enjoy the company." The leader sneered. I looked back at him calmly, with all the presence of a Jedi.

"Your cages cannot contain us. But of course, you are welcome to try." I tried to sound disinterested, but what the other guard was doing distracted me.

"Hey, you don't look so bad. What's you name, sweetheart?" I looked over at the other guard who was sweet-talking Mission.

"Leave me alone, Core-slime. Barves like you make me wanna puke." She said, snatching her arm out of his grasp.

"Don't be like that!" he said, grabbing her arm again, "You know, not many females come to Telos' surface. So what do ya say? How bout you waggle you head tails for me?"

"Get away from me, nerf-herder!" she yelled, and struck him with the back of her hand.

"What the frack? You schutta!" he shoved her back into the force cell and quickly activated it. "This is what you get." he spat at her and pressed the torture button.

"No!" I screamed the same time Mission did. I slammed my fist against the Force cage, ignoring the resulting burn. Mission's shrieks dragged me back to a place I never wanted to see again, a place all too familiar.

_The clicking of a power source. The echoes of nearby explosions. The moaning of a fellow sentient somewhere nearby. All of these sounds had become so familiar. They were the sounds of hell._

_We had been so stupid, falling for their trap. We had felt the taint of the black side of the force while the Republic and the Mandalorians fought for ground. Malak and I gathered a strike team, this was the moment we had been waiting for. We had thought there might have been a Force presence on Malachor, but there was no way we could have been sure. They had been waiting for us, the true sith. It had been a trap, luring us in then capturing our strike team. _

_It had all happened so fast, there was no way to know what was happening, who was been dragged where. The screaming stood out the most. They were not kind, using any and all powers they had to get us to submit. I saw them grab my comrades, my friends. _

"_Alek!" I screamed, and started for him. Someone force shoved me to my knees and I skidded on the rough dirt. Lighting burnt it way across my back, and thankfully I blacked out against the pain._

_I groaned, and rolled my stiff neck. I couldn't tell you how long had passed, but the ach in my joints hinted at a while._

"_Don't move too quickly." a familiar voice said from my right. "They continued to torture us after they caught us."_

_His voice was short and staccato, barely concealing anger. "Right. Alek, where are we?"_

_He shrugged, and turned away from me. This was customary for him, to take anything that went wrong, and take the blame upon his self. "Hey." I said softly, and waited until I had his attention again. "It's not your fault."_

"_Like hell it's not." he muttered, and sat on the floor of his Force cage. _

"_No." I said forcefully, and he glanced over at me. "Eight jedi decided to go. Don't you dare blame yourself for them. This was our idea." I said, stressing the 'our'. I glanced around for the first time we had spoken. There were two other cages in the room, each holding familiar figures._

"_Hey. Bazz, Nick. Wake up." I tried to send a wash of Force healing to them, but the neural disrupter at the top of my cage foiled my attempts. I settled for speaking louder. "Get up!"_

_Finally Bazz stirred on the floor. He sat up slowly, and I saw him wince. "Damn….what the frack happened?"_

_I smirked a little at his undeniable attitude. "We were dumb enough to get captured. Guess we were right though, there are dark jedi here."_

_He nodded, and like Alek, fell silent. Nick stayed unconscious in his cage. I felt the anger start to bubble up, but I managed to push it back. Anger would just get in the way, I needed to think clearly. Carefully, gently I managed to turn around and examine the wiring in my cage. To bad all the power distributors where on the outside. All my experience with security, and I couldn't even figure out a way to get out of here. I hissed quietly and stood, cursing my cell for its lack of space._

_I glanced between the two conscious men. These three had been my friends as long as I could remember. Tighter than tight, although they both had ideas to be more than friends. I was afraid to give them any affection in return, because I didn't want to alienate the other. Bazz was always good for a joke, and a quick pick-me-up. Alek, was just…always there for you, no matter what you needed. He said he would follow me to hell and back, and did._

_Finally a door opened, and an older woman walked through. She was wearing a cloak, two long white braids sticking out of it. Her face was covered, but she walked with an air of authority. I barely glanced up at her, and I saw my companions do the same. _

"_I see you are awake. Good. Then you will answer my questions, or you will die." her voice was cold and sent shivers up my back. But true to my training, I gave no response, although I heard Bazz yawn._

_I peeked up at her again, and her hood was facing my direction. I glanced down again, but her next words made my heart jump._

"_Her. She will break easily." a pair of guards opened my cage, and hoisted me up by my arms. They paused in front of her, and she appeared to look me over. "Very nice. This one is strong, perfect for our mission." I rolled my neck, and tried to appear as unconcerned as possible, although my heart was pounding._

_They ushered me out the door, and immediately my skin turned icy. Not from any noticeable temperature change, but from the feeling of the dark side in the air. I shivered slightly, and the guards gripped me tighter. It was a long hallway, with cavernous wide stone archways. The whole place just screamed power. _

_We finally reached the center of the room. Four huge red pillars towered over us, like wide gaping teeth. One of the guards kicked my legs out from under me, forcing me to my knees. The other one slapped a pair of cuffs on me, preventing me from using any Force powers. Then they both stepped back._

"_This is my academy. This is the place of my power. And it is here, where you will realize the error of your ways, and convert to the true path." she paused, relishing her words, "By force, if necessary."_

_I yawned hugely, and sat back on my feet. I gazed around disinterested. I counted three exits from this room, all at the end a long hallway and guarded. I still had no idea what lay beyond them, or how many more guards there would be._

"_Face me." I heard her say. I pointedly looked down, finding an amazement at the pattern of the floor. She sighed, and then suddenly I was on fire._

_The lightning struck the center of my back, sinking its way into my spinal cord and lighting every nerve in my body in fire. That was the genius of Force powers, normal lightning would have just burned your flesh, but Force lightning sunk its way in, found every path through your flesh, and created agony in places of your body you didn't even know existed._

_I tried to keep quiet, but she intensified the torture, bored with my lack of response. I arched my back, biting my lip until the skin cracked. Finally, finally she stopped. My breathing was heavy, but I was proud of the fact I kept silent. _

"_Now. Face me." she said again, more emphasis on each word. I refused yet again, and braced myself for another dose of lightning._

_You want to turn around.__ A voice said in my mind. I narrowed my eyebrows in confusion. The voice was unrecognizable, but it make so much sense. I could just turn around, and it would all be over…_

_You remember last time, how much it hurt. You don't want to go though that again. All you have to do is turn around.__ I slowly began turning my head to face her._

No._ another voice said, much stronger and familiar than the last one. _Remember your training. Give nothing, say nothing._ I tried listening to that voice, but the other one called so sweetly._

_You could go back to Alek. I know you want to. Just give her what she wants, and you can go. __Yes. I could go back to Alek, it would all be over._

No!_ the other voice argued. _Do you honestly believe she's going to just let you out of here? Now fight back!_ I was so confused. Both voices made so much sense, it was like seeing both sides of a credit. They continued to argue in my head, and I closed my eyes, trying to get them to shut up. If I could just get one second of peace, I could make up my own mind._

_The woman struck me again with lightning, and I screamed briefly out of pain and surprise. In the resulting adrenalin rush, I realized she had corrupted my thoughts using the Force. She knew I would be ready for more pain, so she distracted me first. It was a valid method, and one I had seen before in the Republic._

_Angry with myself, I clamped my lips together. One of the guards kicked me in the middle of my back, and I fell forward. Falling onto my side, I had no choice but to look at her. With disdain, I realized that both guards were mandalorian. I curled my lip in disgust. We had thought that there was some greater power behind the mandalorian sudden need for power, and it looked like this could be it._

_As soon as my eyes met her figure, she stopped with the torture. She let me lay there, panting heavily, while she remained silent. Finally she began with her speech designed to lure me to the dark side._

"_Good." she paused. "You see all around you my academy, my livelihood. There are dark places in this galaxy, ancient centers of learning. This, is mine. I shall become your teacher, and you, my pupil."_

_I couldn't resist rolling my eyes, although I longed to tell her what she could do with her teachings. _

"_Evil is a word used by the ignorant and the weak. The sith, we are about survival. It is about unleashing inner power. It glorifies the strength of the individual. Your Jedi council would have you believe the dark side is something to avoid, something…evil." she paused, and moved her hand slightly. Something moved out of the corner of my eye, and as soon as I turned to face it, it was gone. My heart beat sped up unnaturally, as if someone else was controlling it. Adrenalin again spiked in my veins. The phantom sped around the room, feigning and taunting me. I closed my eyes, and concentrated on my breathing, determined to defeat her Force phantom._

_When my heart beat returned to normal, I opened my eyes. "Don't threaten me. Children are frightened by spirits-Jedi are not."_

"_Mmmm." she said, "But Jedi are frightened by the dark side….or at least they should be. Look around you, the dark side lives and breathes in the very core of this world. Feel it, drink it in. All of this power could be yours." she leaned in closer, quickly closing the space between our faces. "I can feel the dark side's call to you. You cannot fight it. Stop resisting, and claim what is yours."_

_It was too easy. I looked up at her, awestruck. My breathing quickened and my eyes grew wide. I was about a foot away from her when I opened my mouth and spit in her face._

"_Insolent schutta!" she yelled, and struck me across the face. I winced, but it was so worth it. "Take this one away, back to her cage. Maybe after hearing the screams of the others she will be more open to reason."_

_The Mandalorian guards picked me up again and started to drag me out of the room. I felt extremely guilty. If I had only been able to take her torture longer, one of my fellow jedi would still be safe. We reached my prison, and the guard on my right opened the door. Nick was just beginning to stir. They threw me back into the Force cage, and stepped back to wait for the old which._

_All semblance of disinterest were gone. It took all of my training as a jedi not to break down in sobs. Somebody else getting hurt because of me, that was my worst fear. That's why I defied the council and went to fight the Mandalorians. So many people were hurting, were dying, and I could have stopped it. I could have stopped it all. That was, until we were stupid enough to get captured._

_Alek and Nick looked over at me worriedly. I refused to meet their eyes. Bazz was the only one who stayed true to his training, remaining indifferent. I slumped against the floor of my cage, my back still burning with the after affects of the lightning._

_The door opened once again, and the witch entered again. She turned slowly, examining all of us. Her eyes came to rest on Bazz. "Him." was all she said. The two guards grabbed him under his arms and dragged him out. They started for the door, but the woman stopped them. "No, set him down here, so they can watch."_

_Bazz looked over at me as he kneeled on the cold floor. I stood, giving him the decency of not looking away. A tear traced my cheek as she raised her arm. The lightning struck the center of his back, and he gave a shout._

"_No!" I screamed, and slammed my fist against the wall of my cage. The resulting burn just added insult to injury, as it showed I was once again helpless to save somebody I loved._

"Lola? Lola…Lola!" Mission's voice snapped me out of my reverie.

"Huh? Oh…yeah?" I stuttered, still half back on Malachor.

"You alright?" Carth asked me. "You were gone a long time there."

"Yeah…yeah I'm fine." I mentally shook myself. "Are _you_ alright?" I asked Mission.

"I'm great now that the sleemo is gone." she rubbed her hands together eagerly. "Alright Lola, so what's your big plan? Are we going to short out our cages, persuade the guards to let us go, or are we just gonna go out there and kick some serious arse!"

I frowned at her. "Watch your language." I smirked as she glared at me. "And my plan is to meditate."

There was a pause as she and Carth decided whether or not to believe me. "Uh, right, Lola. And that's going to help us…how?" Carth asked me.

I rolled my eyes. "You'll see. We're not going anywhere for the time being, so you might as well relax. Our…'rescue' will be here shortly."

"Right." Carth said, in a way that meant "fat chance." He turned around and began fiddling with the wires at the back of his cage. Mission started to do the same. I sat down and crossed my legs, trying to find some semblance of inner peace. My breathing slowed and I could feel myself slipping into a meditative trance. I focused on the Force, that strand of life that flowed through me. I grabbed it and projected it outward.

Any other jedi would have realized instantly what I was doing by reading my aura. I thrust as much Force as I could out of me, projecting my position. _Come on sith dogs,_ I thought, _come and find me. _The sith assassins would be hunting for me. They knew I was on Telos, they just didn't know where. Well, now they did. I would just have to sit and wait for them to show up.

I didn't have to wait long. Within an hour I heard the first shots being fired. I could practically see the battle. The assassins would have sneaked in quietly, under the radar. They would have set up a battle perimeter around their enemy, and attacked at the same time. I had seen them fight so many times, I could predict their every move. And right about now they would be breaching the complex, and the mercenaries would send guards to every prison block. I stood up just as the door was opening.

"What's going on out there?" Carth asked the trembling soldier.

"I…I don't know. Everything was normal, and all of a sudden we were being attacked on all sides. It was as if they were invisible or something! They ordered a couple of us to guard the prisoners." He had a white knuckled grip on his blaster rifle, and he looked like nothing more than a scared kid.

"Hey kid," I said. "Come here." he reluctantly approached.

"What…what do you want? You b-better not try anything." He was shaking worse than a leaf in a storm.

"Relax." I told him, my voice borderline hypnotic, "There's no way you can hold back the enemies if they manage to make it this far. Why don't you let us out, and we'll help protect you." Normally he could have resisted my dominant mind trick, but fear allowed his mental block to break. He hesitated one, maybe two seconds before letting us out. Carth wasted no time in getting his arm around the soldiers neck and knocking him unconscious. He grabbed the blaster rifle, and I handed his back up pistol to Mission.

"What exactly did you do while you were meditating?" Mission asked me.

"The assassins out there were looking for me any way, I just pointed them in the right direction. They were the distraction we needed to get out of here. Now let's go get the guys." We started out down the hall, but I motioned for them to stop. A mercenary came around the corner, and before he could raise the alarm I had him in a stasis. I dragged him back inside our prison for interrogation. "Where are you keeping the others?" I asked him harshly.

"Like I'm going to tell you." he struggled against my stasis, but I only allowed his head the freedom to move. I knelt down next to him, staring directly into his eyes.

"You want to tell me where the others are." I said calmly and seriously. He struggled for a bit, but I saw his eyes grow wider when I completely took over his mind.

"I….I guess I could tell you where they are. Wouldn't do me any harm. They are down the hallway, on the left. You can have my keycard to get in." He slowly gained his own consciousness back when I broke eye contact.

"Great, but what are we going to do with him? We can't just leave him here, he could give our position away." I eyed Carth, thinking of a plan. A glint got my attention, and I motioned for Carth to help me pick our prisoner up.

"Hey, what? You cant just leave me in here like this! I'll see you crucified for this!" I waved at him as we left the prison, his face slightly blurred from the flickering force cage he was in. He was still yelling long after the door clanged shut behind us.

"Okay then…lets go rescue the boys." Mission said, and we sneaked around the corner, on the lookout for any mercenaries or assassins. Mercifully, we saw none. Using the keycard, Mission opened the door revealing Jolee, Dustil, and Bao-Dur in identical cages.

"Mission!" Dustil exclaimed, "How did you guys manage to get out?"

"Aw, man. You should have seen it! We were all kicking arse, and showing those mercenaries a thing or two. I tell ya, next time they find a jedi they won't be so keen to try and capture her."

I rolled my eyes while pressing the release. I was content to let it go. What ego couldn't use a good stroking? Unfortunately Jolee wasn't about to be upstaged.

"Yeah right, she used Force persuade to get the guard to open her cage. Not exactly heroic, if you ask me." he rubbed his wrist where the stun-cuffs had dug in a little too deep.

"Well, we weren't asking, were we Jolee?" Mission said indignantly.

Bao-Dur followed my lead and promptly ignored the squabbling between the two. "Now, if I remember correctly," he said, "Our stuff should be stored in the room down the hallway."

"Good." Carth nodded, taking the lead. "Lets get going."

I was a little miffed that he assumed the role of leader, but I let it go. We headed down the corridor to get our stuff. We had just picked up our weapons when I turned to Bao. "Alright, you're the only one who's been here before. Where do we need to go?"

He checked out the hallway before answering. "There's an computer console that I can use to find in power fluctuations in the shields grid."

Carth, deciding to be this little expeditions leader, took charge. "Alright then, that's the plan. Where is this console?"

Bao had the decency to look disgruntled, "On the other side of the base."

"Great!" Jolee said sarcastically. "And thanks to Lola's great plan, we'll have to fight our way there. Thanks again Lola."

I narrowed my eyes at him even though I knew he was kidding. "Yeah, and the mercenaries will be too busy fighting back the assassins to notice us. That way, we can sneak over there without fighting off an entire base."

Jolee thought for a second, then winked at me. "Good to know you haven't lost your leading skills."

Carth cleared his throat. "Hate to break this up, but we need to get a move on before one of the two groups out there gets a hold on things." Everyone agreed, and we started for the computer, following Bao's lead.

One thing was bothering me though. I fell back to the last dregs of the group, where Carth was taking tail. "Would you stop that?" I whispered to him.

He wouldn't look directly at me, but at least he did answer me. "Stop what?"

I rolled my eyes while checking around a corner. "Stop taking the lead. This is my mission, if you don't remember."

"Yeah, and it's my orders to make sure you don't screw it up." he said. I opened my mouth to make a retort, but Dustil interrupted us.

"If you two are done back there, we're about to cross the courtyard." He was right. The base opened up to a giant field, where the fighting was still taking place. The dead and dying were everywhere, and skirmishes were taking place periodically around the green. It was hard to tell just by looking who was winning. It seemed to be a pretty even battle, although there could be more sith lurking in the shadows.

We made a quick dash to the other side of the base, our three Jedi carefully concealing our presence in the Force. We stayed alongside the edge of the woods, hoping to decrease visibility as much as possible. "Just where is this thing?" I asked Bao again.

He pointed. "Right over there." I followed his finger, and immediately groaned. It was on top of a building, in the most visible place in the whole base.

"Alright then. Bao, Jolee, and Lola, go up top and get what we need from the console. Dustil, Mission, you're with me. We'll guard the bottom of the ramp so no unfriendlies can climb to the top. On three…one, two Three!"

We all took off for our scheduled places. There was one guard coming down the ramp as we passed the corner.

"The prisoners! They've-" that was all he managed to get out before our three Jedi rose our hands at the same time and Force pushed him into the nearest wall. Because of the triple strong shove, he fell unconscious immediately. Unfortunately, he had alerted some nearby guards with his exclamation.

"We'll handle them, just go!" Mission urged us, and our little group ran up the ramp. Jolee and I deflected any blaster shots aimed at us, and gave Bao a clear path to the console. We had his back, fighting off the assassins and mercenaries on top of the building. So far my plan was working, the two groups were too occupied to shove their full strength onto us. That didn't mean that we didn't have our work cut out for us though, there were plenty of enemies everywhere to keep us all busy.

"You mind hurrying that up a little, Bao?" I called behind me. I gritted my teeth and swung at a mercenary, but he parried with his vibrosword. He sidestepped quickly and brought his blade down, but luckily Jolee was there to block it. I quickly incapacitated him and turned to the next guy.

"Hold on…I'm almost-Got it! Get to the hanger!" Bao yelled behind me, and we all sprinted down the ramp. Mission saw us coming and opened the door, firing with her blaster to keep any of the bad guys from coming in. As soon as we were all in, Jolee and I sealed the door behind us. The only way we were getting out of this now was in a body bag or in that shuttle. Preferably the latter.

We branched out into a familiar pattern, keeping enough distance between ourselves to minimize damage from any explosive attacks. Bao took point again, seeing as he was the only one who knew where to go.

It was quiet, a little too quiet for my liking. I saw the floor change, from standard tile to a grate of some sorts. We had taken a few steps in when I noticed something underneath the grating.

"Stop!" I yelled, and the group froze. I slowly bent down, and confirmed my earlier diagnostic. "The floors rigged with motion sensors. One wrong step, and you'll fill the whole room with gas."

"Great." Dustil sighed behind me, "What do you suppose we do?"

I concentrated, and closed my eyes. I opened my mind to the Force, while keeping my presence hid. I could just barely make out energy lines sweeping the floor in a grid like pattern.

"Jolee, take one step to your right, and two steps forward." He complied silently, not wanting to break my concentration. I guided the rest of the group across the floor like that, telling them exactly how far and where to move. It took a long time, but it was a hell of a lot safer that way.

Finally, when we crossed the room, we found the shuttle. Bao immediately set to work, while the rest of us spread out to make sure there wasn't anybody lurking around that shouldn't be.

"Ahh, Blast it." Bao groaned.

"What's wrong?" Mission asked worriedly, as she walked up to peer over his shoulder at the screen.

"They've shut the whole place into lockdown. The only way we're getting out of here is too get the over-ride codes to the hanger door, and the take off codes to the shuttle."

"I'm willing to bet there's an extra copy laying around here somewhere," Carth said, "Or at least a console we could hack into to get them."

"No sense staying around here, then sonny. Let's get to it. I'm old, and want to get home for my evening tea." Jolee said, and led the way through an open door and down the hall.

Unfortunately the hall spit into three directions.

"Well…that's convenient." I said sarcastically as our group came to a stop.

"Three hallway, 6 people. I say we split up into two man teams and start searching. We're gonna need a mechanic in each group, so Mission, you and Bao are going to have to be in separate teams." Dustil said.

Carth nodded in agreement. "We should probably have a Jedi in each group also, to hide our presence and to be able to detect any assassins around."

"Good idea." Mission said. "Dustil, your with me." she tugged on his arm and the began to jog down one of the hallways.

"Come with me, sonny." Jolee said, putting his arm around Bao's shoulders. "Maybe you can tell me more about that 'remote' of yours." Bao went with him down the second hallway, flashing me an apologetic look as he went.

I eyed Carth warily. How in Force's name had this one happened? He gestured down the remaining hallway. "After you."

I took point, scanning for any abnormalities in the Force. It was a relatively short hallway, that ended by the power control room, which also had a console in it.

I scanned the small room quickly, then knelt down by console. "Keep watch by the doors. I cant scan and hack at the same time, and I don't want to be jumped while I'm handling wires."

Surprisingly, he took my advice and guarded the door. It was almost as if we were back on Taris, he was reluctant to give up any power but he understood the necessity of some of my plans.

I took off the back panels and found the power wires. I melded them together, and saw the screen light up. "Pure pazaak." I whispered, and Carth turned around.

"What's that?" he asked, and I shook my head.

"Nothing. I'm in, should only be a few…frack!" He walked over to me, abandoning his post,

"Sounds like your about to tell me something I don't want to hear."

"They had more security than I thought. Here, I could use some help…"

"What do you need?" he asked.

I gestured to the console. "I'm going to have to reroute system commands to a congruent mainframe, then access them from here. I'll be done in a sec." I bent down again, grabbing a couple more wires and stripped the plastic coating from them with my teeth. I brushed away some wires from the outer hardrive and picked it open. Fusing the bare wires with the systems block, I managed to short it out. "What's the screen look like?" I asked him.

"Blue, flashing error code seven alpha niner foxtrot delta. Its asking for an override code."

"Good. Type in Zero, hotel, niner, seven, bravo, fiver, two, two, six." I paused for a second, allowing him time to enter the code. "What's it say now?"

"It's blinking, 'system error.' Doesn't look good to me. What are you doing down there anyway?" I toyed with some wires while he talked, having messed up somewhere and needing to find the error. I pulled at a blue wire, trying to strip it so I could blend it with the main power functions. One of the wires wasn't grounded properly, and a shower of sparks flew from the contact.

"Frack!" I hissed, sitting up and clutching my injured hand. I had the weird numbing/tingling sensation of nerves burning. I glared menacingly at the console, but it seemed something good happened. The main power turbines was beginning to turn, jumpstarted by the minor explosion.

"Shavit!" Carth added, bending down and dragging me a few feet away from the console. "Here, let me see." He pulled gently at my wrist while taking some kolto cloths from a pocket. He quickly injected me with a local numbing agent and then went to work cleaning the wound. The situation seemed so ironic, I couldn't hold back a chuckle.

He raised his eyebrows, but kept his eyes on his work. "Something funny?"

I shook my head, "No, its just the other day, it was your wife cleaning up after me." He stayed quiet, frowning, and I immediately realized my mistake. "Oh…um…It's was no problem, Carth. She saw me after my fight against the assassin, and practically pulled me inside."

He smirked slightly, and nodded. "Yeah, she's like that. Got a heart of gold. I'm surprised she's not out trying to rescue everyone in the galaxy. She's a lot like you, in that respect."

It should have felt awkward to discuss his wife, but like so many things with him, it was natural. The tension abated with his slow breathing, and I watched his hands, steady and proficient in their work. Against my will, my eyes drifted to his face, and I subtly began examining him. He seemed to glow, almost like he was lit from within. Without thinking, I said my thoughts aloud. "I was hoping we'd get a chance to talk. It's so strange, seeing you after so much time, and having to become reacquainted in front of everyone else. Remember how we used to run off as soon as we possibly could?" Immediately I wished I could take back the words, but he immediately put me at ease without uttering a word. His lips lifted in a smile, and I noted the shallow dimple in his right cheek. A dimple that had no left-side mate, I recalled suddenly.

"Yeah. While we got a minute, I need to talk to you about this mission." he said brusquely.

A thin tendril of fear gripped my heart. I had just gotten used to the idea of him coming along, and now he was going to tell me he was staying. "Oh…Force. I totally understand. You just got married, you'd want to stay home. It's okay. We can handle this on our own…"

He gave me a confused look. "What are you talking about?"

"You're…you're staying, right? Here, I mean. On Telos."

He laughed slightly. "Force no. Orders are orders, after all. But I should let you know why exactly the governess was so eager to let you go."

My smile faded slightly. "Why?"

"As you know, the Republic is weak. They are eager to root out any seeming threats. It's damn close to martial rule. They cant afford anything striking them now, especially the new sith on the outer rim."

I nodded, slightly confused by his tone. "Yes, I know. That's why I left. I left you a datapad. It was on the bed the night I…"

"I got it." He interrupted me.

"Yes, well. I just ask because…" I waved a hand dismissively, "I wanted to make sure you got it. I'm sure Canderous would have told you I ran into him, and where I was headed, but you can never be too sure with him. I wanted to say goodbye. Not that it was important…I just wanted you to know…how sorry I was that I had to leave."

He nodded again. I _was_ sorry I had to leave, but there was so much more than that. I had left a hologram sight where he could leave me messages. Untraceable, perfectly safe. Granted, it was saved on a different file, but he should have been able to find it. I wanted an answer, I wanted absolution that he forgave me for leaving. I figured that he had never found the datapad, and that was why he never tried to contact me. I guess now his silence was answer enough.

"Well, I guess a datapad is better than no goodbye at all." he said distractedly.

"It's funny. Coming back, it feels like coming home. Even after…what happened, I'm glad I came here. I haven't realized how much I missed this place, missed everybody. It feels right to be back."

"Lola…" he tried to interrupt me.

Call it what you will, a sense of foreboding, an intuition, or even the Force, I knew I did not want to hear what he had to say. "When I realized I was coming home, I started remembering things I hadn't thought of in years. Like all those pranks Mission used to play on Bastila, or HK-47 trying to roast gizka with his flame thrower."

"Lola, about the mission…."

"Or Jolee scaring the bejesus out of Dustil when they first met, by telling him what the dark side could do to a man's-"

"Lola, they're planning to arrest the Jedi."

I stopped talking so abruptly that my mouth stayed briefly in the shape of my next word.

"They're going to arrest them." he repeated more forcefully, as if I'd asked what he meant, "And they want you and I to help round them up."

"They don't trust the council. The Jedi are an extreme risk. Considering what the last war did to the galaxy, you cant really blame them. They think they'll be better off without any Jedi. And because the Force-users are too strong to be imprisoned, they'll be facing an execution charge for crimes against the galaxy. And that includes you." He kept his gaze on my face, his expression kind but firm. I could only imagine what kind of treason he was committing right now, but all I could think about was a galaxy without the order.

"You'll be fine, Lola," he said impulsively. "It's not as if I'm going to turn you, of all people, out on the street without help."

The look I gave him could have chilled ice. As if I wanted his help. It was his Republic that was threatening all I stood for, all I knew!

"Not that you wouldn't do fine on the street," he said, backtracking quickly. "I don't mean on the street, of course. I mean, I know you have some hidden ties, some people who will help get you out of it, as I understand it."

My look turned to one of surprise. What was he talking about? "Not that I expect to leave you to sink or swim on your own, with just your sideline." he took a deep breath. "What I'm trying to say is, I'll take care of you."

"You'll _take care_ of me?" I asked incredulous. Considering our conversation, perhaps that wasn't the best way to put it.

He coughed, frowning. "Well, no. Not me, per se. I mean…well I _don't_ mean 'I'll take care of you' in the way it sounds. We-and by 'we' I mean the majority of the Republic-recognize the service you've given over the years, and we want to reward you for it."

I dropped my head, then looked at him from the tops of my eyes. "The service I've been giving? How about, the service the entire order has been given? How _dare_ the Republic think itself pompous enough to get rid of an ancient necessity to this galaxy!"

He continued to blunder his way through this. "Of course. We just- I want you to know we intend to be fair, in light of the contributions you've made, and those your order has made. The contributions everyone's made, of course, but especially you." he stopped, realizing he had gone way too far and said way too much of exactly the wrong things.

"Thank you for telling me." my voice was low, and I felt dangerously composed.

"Lola, I'm sorry." he scooted toward me more, but I backed in the other direction. "I know this must be a shock. I want you to know that I wish there was another way. A way that didn't impact your life so much."

I raised my chin, "I'm fine."

He straightened. "Of course. I know you're fine. It just must be surprising." he paused, "Lola, I want you to know that I'm not harboring any ill will toward you because of…well, because of what happened in our past. This decision was made independent of any of that."

I blinked. Did he really think I would suspect him of ordering an execution trial, because I left four years ago? "Carth, I would never have thought that of you. You know that."

"Good." he inhaled deeply, "In fact, I want you to know that I see now that you were right, all those years ago. I wanted to thank you for that. For being so much wiser than your years."

"I was right?" I repeated. Right about what?

"Yes. To leave when you did. You were smart. It would never have worked. _We _would have never worked."

I could feel my cheeks flushing. "You've seen me for one week and decided that?"

He shook his head. "No, that's not what I mean. I've known for a long time, for years. I've thought time and again over the last four years how right you were. I just wanted you to know that."

I could feel the anger swelling in my chest. "So…" I paused and cleared my throat. "So what you're saying is that for over four years now you've been wanting to thank me for not being with you? You've thought this 'time and time again?"

"What? No. That's not what I said-"

"That's _just_ what you said, Carth. Look, this whole conversation is awkward, I know that. We haven't seen each other for a long time and you've had to give me some difficult news. But let's at least be honest here. You're saying you've been happy to be without me. Fine. I understand."

"No, that's not what I meant. I meant that-" he sighed.

"For example," he started over, "Last year I went to four charity balls, half a dozen corporate banquets, and a slew of events as a very visible sponsor. I gave speeches. All to a bunch of people, who wouldn't like to see the former Dark Lord hanging on my arm. You'd have hated my life."

"So…your public persona…your rich and famous lifestyle…That's the reason you were glad to be without me?" I looked at him carefully.

"Come on Lola. You know what I'm saying. You never would have outgrew the stigma of being a sith. You would have hated it, being stared at every convention, people openly snubbing you…You knew that even four years ago."

I clenched my jaw, "You know what, Carth? There really isn't any need to get into this. All of that was a long time ago." I glanced down, "Besides, what I would have hated four years ago has very little to do with who I am now."

He crossed his arms over his chest and sighed. "Okay. I just want you to know that what you gave up is nothing you'd even want now."

I turned back to him, eyebrows drawn. "Do I seem as if I want something from you now?"

"No. Don't misunderstand what I'm saying here. I just meant that-"

"Carth, listen." it was my turn to interrupt him, "Decisions were made a long time ago based on a very different set of circumstances. I don't think we need to get into all the reasons now. It's been a long time, and those reasons are gone. Forgotten, mostly. So let's not get into what a great decision it was, okay?"

"I agree," he said, his eyes steady on mine. "What's past is past. That's all I'm trying to say, Lola. Things worked out for the best."

For a moment, all we did was stare at each other.

"Then I suggest,' I said finally, "That we don't indulge in any intimacies left over from our past."

"Of course not." he paused, "What do you mean?"

"I just want to make sure we don't get our signals crossed." I said briskly.

"I'm not sending any signals."

"Good."

"Yes, good." he shot back. "Glad we got that straightened out." He tossed his head angrily, and those two stubborn locks of hair fell into his eyes. I thought about the time, a long time ago, when I would have reached up and brushed them back without giving a second thought. The distance between that time and this one stood between them like a wall.

"So, can we be all business now?" he asked finally. He held his hand out to shake.

"All business." My voice was steady, my hand firm when it gripped his. Then I did something completely out of character.

All I knew was that in one moment I was upset that Carth was so completely over me, and in the next, I was sure he was lying. And I set out to prove it. So, in a completely uncharacteristic moment, I took an incendiary situation and dumped gasoline all over it.

He loosened his fingers to let go, but I didn't. We stood a pace apart, hands clasped across the distance, eyes studying each other as if seeing someone new.

Slowly, I closed the gap between us.

I got close, reached up, and touched his lips with mine. He could have backed away, asked me what the frack I thought I was doing. But he didn't. Despite his words, his mouth moved in response. I stepped closer and put my other hand on his chest.

He was familiar, yet strange. We were in synch because we'd kissed a thousand times before, but he was exotic in a way I had given up hope of ever finding again. Carth swept one arm behind me, pulling me in closer. My fingers tightened in his hand, and my lips touched his again, opening beneath them.

But I stopped, and shifted so that my mouth was close to his ear.

"Just business." I said quietly, then straightened and turned away, walking down the hallway away from him.

A/N Yay! Another chapter! Hopefully it was worth the wait, I'll try to be quicker next time.

What did you think about the Malachor scene? Do you wanna see more of Bazz and Nick? How about Darth Traya capturing the Jedi, did it seem realistic?

What do you think about Carth taking control of the mission? Do you want Jolee to get a 'remote' of his own? And what do you think Lola meant with that kiss?

As always, anyone who reviews gets a preview of the next chapter and a lifetime of gratitude from me!

And a huge thanks to my beta's, rockforthecross74 and Princess Ashira. Go read their fics, A return to life and Who I Am or Who I've been. They are such great stories, from really talented authors.

Merry Chistmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, or happy Birthday of the religious deity of your choice. And Happy New Year! Give me a present by reviewing? :D


	7. Droids, Droids Everywhere

**Hello all! So I am still alive! I wrote this chapter forever ago, and was just about to send it off to my beta reader, when my laptop went to the great computer shop in the sky. T.T So I had to rewrite this chapter, and trust me it was about the last thing I wanted to do, not because I didn't want it done, but because my creative urges died when my computer did. But I finally got it done, and just a quick recap of what's going on in the story- Lola comes back from the outer rim to reunite with Carth, but accidently walks in on him marrying Sarah. To get back at him, she hooks up with Canderous after getting completely sloshed at a bar. No time to dwell on that however, because she needs to warn the Republic about the True Sith gaining power on the outer rim. The Republic Governess on Telos agrees with Lola's proposal, and decides to send her off to reunite the council, along with Bastila, Mission, Dustil, Canderous, and yes, Carth. Dustil gets angry with Lola because he thinks she will hurt his father again, and decides to come along to protect his father and Mission (whom he is in love with). As they're getting ready to leave, they find that the Ebon Hawk has been stolen, and must travel down to Telos's surface to find it. There they run into Bao-Dur, an old time friend of Lola's, and get captured by mercenaries protecting the compound there. Lola manages to get them out of their predicament by using the Force to project her position, so the Sith assassins who have been trailing her can attack the compound, giving them a chance to escape. They find a shuttle they can use, but split up so they can find the take-off codes. Carth tells Lola that the only reason the Republic allows them to go on this mission is because they want to betray the Jedi and put them on trial for crimes against the galaxy. They get into a heated argument, and Carth wants to make sure that Lola knows that he didn't want this to happen, and it wasn't issued because of her leaving. They decide to have a 'strictly business' relationship with each other, shaking on that fact when Lola leans up and kisses Carth, which brings us to now. Enjoy!**

**Also, sorry for anyone who got multiple alerts about this chapter, I've just gone back and fixed some errors that my beta reader (rockforthecross74) pointed out. Thanks rftc!**

Jolee- "We managed to get power to the hangar doors, and the takeoff codes to the shuttle. Everyone, fall back to the hangar." Lola' s voice crackled over the comlink and I glared at it menacingly.

"You mean to tell me that we came all this way for nothing?" I growled at her, but the transition was cut off from the other side. Grumbling angrily, I clipped the com back onto my belt.

"Guess we ought to go back now. I want to make sure that the shuttle will work." Bao-Dur said, and started back down the hallway.

"We come all this way, just to turn around and go back the other way!" I muttered to myself. "Say, sonny..." I turned to Bao, "You never did say exactly where we are going to be taking this hunk of junk."

"There's a power fluctuation on the polar side of the planet. I'm not surprised that czerka didn't catch it, it's only minimal and almost looks like an error in the grid. If there's an illegal landing site somewhere, that's where it's going to be."

I digested this for a moment. "I wonder who would have an illegal landing site in the middle of nowhere, and what they would use it for. This could turn out to be interesting…*very* interesting indeed." I had my suspicions, but I could not voice them yet. Too many coincidences had occurred since Lola's arrival on Telos. And I don't believe in coincidences.

We arrived first to the hangars, and immediately a huge tank droid caught my attention, as huge tank droids are wrought to do.

"Gee…this looks like fun." Bao whispered, ducking into a corner as to not draw attention.

I eyed its huge weapon, and then glanced back at the door behind us. "C'mon," I told Bao, "We can get out of here and leave Big Guy for somebody else. What do ya say?"

Just before he could answer, I felt a presence at my back. "Too late, old man," Mission said, sliding in behind me, "How should we take him out?"

Dustil, Mission, and I seemed to be at a loss, but Bao was eyeing the droid with interest. "Dustil," he said suddenly, "If I told you exactly where his control cluster was, do you think you could rip it out using the Force?"

_What am I?_ I thought to myself, _Chopped liver?_ But Dustil nodded seriously, and Bao began explaining the schematics of the challenging droid in front of us. While they droned on about control clusters I noticed the two missing members of our group. I reached out with the Force to see if I could find Lola.

It wasn't that hard. Any neophyte padawan could have picked her up. Her emotional aura was a mess, ranging from guilt and embarrassment, to anger and sadness. The amount and strength of the emotions was staggering. I carefully delved into her mind to find out was causing it. Deeper…deeper…ahh. There it is. I smiled at her actions, but stayed silent when the embarrassed pair showed up a few seconds later.

"Shavit!" Carth whispered, his eyes going wide as she took her place behind Dustil. "What is that thing?"

"An X2-T47 attack droid." Mission told him.

"Oh," Lola said simply. She waited until the droid had turned around, with his sensors facing away from us, before she jumped into action. She ran faster than was humanly possible, force jumped onto the shuttle, and ran across the surface to meet the droid. He turned just in time to see all of Lola's 5 foot 6 frame flying through the air towards him. She ignited her lightsaber in midair before landing on his back. The jarring landing almost ripped her weapon from her hand, but she snatched it back out of the air. The droid shook underneath her, trying to dislodge her. She fought to maintain her perch on his back, while the droid bucked, trying to throw her off.

Lola finally grabbed her balance on the droid, and raised her lightsaber in the air to thrust it down vertically into the droid's head. Before she could make contact, I saw Dustil raise his hand. The center of the droid exploded into a shower of sparks. The droid convulsed and started falling towards the ground. Lola lost her balance, and I managed to grab her lightsaber out of the air a split second before it took off her right arm. The droid fell toward her, and she barely managed to roll out of the way before it hit the ground with a resounding clang.

Lola stared at the droid, panting, before turning and looking at us. "What the hell just happened?" she asked angrily.

"I ripped the control cluster out with the Force. Got a problem with it?" Dustil said arrogantly.

"You ripped the control cluster out while I was on top of the thing? Are you insane? You could have killed me!"

"Oh yes, the 'prodigal knight' brought down by a droid. Yeah, right. I'm going to open the hangar doors. Would you mind getting the shuttle in working order?" he asked her.

She stood still for a minute, then shrugged indifferently and got to work.

_Lola_… I began talking to her through the Force, _I think you have some explaining to do._

Her back tensed, and then she resumed typing. _About what?_ She asked, her voice echoing through the Force.

I rolled my eyes, grateful that no one could see. _Well, I don't know what you crazy kids are calling it these days, but you and Carth have one hell of a business relationship._

_Business relationship?_ She questioned me. _I have no idea what you're talking about._

I harrumphed silently._ Don't play dumb with me missy, I'm much better at it. Now, I don't know what you're trying to do here, but you're playing with fire. Just…make sure you don't get burned, alright?_

Her voice sounded small when she continued. _Alright…I'm just so confused. Don't you have a cryptic story or something that covers this?_

I guffawed silently. _Nope, romances where never my thing. After the drama of the first one, I got out of the whole ordeal completely. For once you've managed to come up with something I've never seen before. But the next time an Ex-Sith lord comes home to her love getting married, I'll know just what to tell him._

I saw her chuckle slightly as she finished up with the computer. _Thanks, Jolee._ her voice sounded warmer, at least.

I winked at her as the hangar doors began to open. Bao called us over, saying that the shuttle was ready. I gave Lola a small wink as I took the co-pilot seat beside Carth. If anyone noticed the seat change, nobody was dumb enough to say so. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Mission wrap her arm around Lola in that caring way she had.

"Alright old man, let's see what this baby can do." Carth said while priming the engines.

"You sure you don't want me in the pilot's chair? I'd think we'd all feel safer if someone else took the controls for a while." Carth shot me a condescending look as we slowly began our ascent into the wild blue.

The battle still continued in a smaller scale on the ground beneath us. A few erratic soldiers fired after us, but the bolts reflected downward and fell back to the planet. Bao told Carth the coordinates we were headed to, and we fell into a peaceful silence.

"You're being uncharacteristically quiet up there, Jolee," Mission started, "What's on your mind?"

"Just thinking about what kind of people would own an illegal landing site on the backside of Telos. And then what those people were thinking stealing a Jedi's ship. And how convenient it is that while we are on the surface looking for said ship, there happens to be tons of Sith assassins waiting to play decoy so we could get away."

"Alright, what are you getting at?" Dustil asked me, and I could see his mind working behind his hazel eyes, going through the possible explanations.

"I'm probably wrong and this is probably nothing. But I have this ugly feeling in the pit of my stomach that says we're walking into a trap," I told them as the first hint of white verged on the horizon.

"Everyone keep your eyes peeled, and stay alert. I don't like it when a Jedi says he's got a bad feeling," Bao said, and subconsciously pulled his blaster out of his holster.

"We should be landing in a few minutes. I'm not picking anything up on the radar-" Carth began, but was interrupted by a missile crashing into the right wing of the shuttle.

"Not again!" I heard Mission shout before the ground came rushing up much too fast and the flash of flames receded into blissful blackness.

_"Come on Jolee, we need to get this shipment to the Ukatis system before they close the blockade." my partner Talix said._

_I nodded and sent extra power to the hyper drive. We had a ship full of 'borrowed' goods and were taking them to the refugees from the war with Exar Kun. The council might have been content to allow them to starve, but I wasn't. I still felt a pang of consciousness because I was deliberately defying their orders. It wasn't the first time I had questing their judgment, and I'm sure it won't be the last._

_I ran my hands through my jet black hair, "How much longer until we get there?"_

_Talix checked the radar. "We're almost to the blockade. It's going to take some fancy flying to get through this one." _

_I shot him a cocky smile, "Is there any other kind?" Talix rolled his eyes and smiled. We dropped out of hyperspace and turned on the shields at the same time. I could see the armada of the kings ships, fully armed and on the lookout for ships exactly like us. This wasn't exactly our first run through this system, and our ship was infamous._

_"You are entering a quarantined area. Turn around and leave the area immediately." a voice said over the communicator, and my palms grew damp on the controls. This was always the best part, the most dangerous part. Talix flipped a switch and I heard and felt the starboard engines hum to life._

_"Get ready." Talix said simply as we slowly gained speed towards the blockade._

_"You have failed to comply with our wishes. We are sending out a pair of fighter jets to escort you in. If you do not comply, we will use deadly force." as promised, two jets detached from the nearest capital ship and flew to us in formation; one in front of us and one behind. We followed them for a bit, nearing the blockade and the planet._

_"You ready for this?" I asked Talix. _

_He nodded nervously, and his knuckles grew white on the controls. "Let's do this."_

_I pressed a quick burst of power to the engine and flipped the ship over itself into a barrel roll. I turned the ship to face the planet while Talix fired at the pair of jets. He aimed above them as to not damage their ships. We were smugglers, not traitors._

_We had the advantage in speed, but the two small jets had the advantage in maneuverability. The trick was all in the timing. We had modified our hyperdrive to allow quick, short jumps; only a klick or so. All we had to do was get out of firing range from the jets, make a quick jump outside the planet's atmosphere, and land in one of the refugees landing pads. All so simply, yet one mistake could cost us our lives, and the lives of hundreds below on the planet, depending on the cargo we had stored on our ship. _

_We were gaining distance to the planet, about to make the jump when something went horribly wrong. A lucky shot from one of the jets blasted our hyperspanner just as we were making the jump. The too quick jump overloaded the console, and we lost control of the ship. _

_"Hold on!" Talix yelled as the planet got closer. With the console overloaded, we lost all control of brakes, steering, and landing equipment. We were helpless against the unrelenting gravity of the planet pulling us closer to our demise. _

_We crash landed onto the planet, sparks flying from the controls and alarms blaring in the background. Our ship skipped across the surface a few times, leaving gaping wounds in our hull and the dirt. We finally skidded to a stop, and I dragged a fist to the panel and shut off the alarms._

_"Damn…well, that was fun," Talix groaned while unbuckling himself. _

_"Let's do that again!" I said sarcastically eager. I rolled out of my chair, the pounding in my head and the spinning of the world made me want to barf. I glanced back into the cargo bay; most of the inventory were either thrown about, or was spilling out of the boxes they came from. This would be a headache and a half to clean up. I felt Talix behind me, and heard the rhythm in his walk that foretold some sort of leg trauma. I tried to send a wave of Force healing to him, but at this point I couldn't gather enough Force to heal a paper cut._

_I caught a glance of myself in a passing mirror. A gash by my eyes said I had hit my head on the cockpit wall, and also explained my screwy vision. I could already feel bruises forming on my chest where the belt had been, and possibly some broken ribs. A few electrical burns on my hands and arms, a mild case of whiplash causing my neck to protest severely as I turned my head. All in all not the worst I've ever had. _

_"Time to face the music." Talix said while saddling up to the hatch controls._

_"Dun...dun…da-duh.." I hummed the traditional death march under my breath. The controls had been overloaded, and the door had to be opened manually. Normally not a problem, but I think my sore muscles protested louder than the door did. Finally we got the door open, and we came out in fashionable prisoner style, hands up. _

_One of the jets had landed beside us, and the pilot was climbing out of it. He jumped down, pulling his blaster while simultaneously._

_I had to blink-hard- to make sure my eyes weren't deceiving me. The pilot removed his helmet with a practiced art, shaking his head to let his hair fall out. When the pilot finally looked at us I realized with a stunning clarity, that the pilot was a she, not a he. She was beautiful. Long, dark brunette hair tied into four ropes, beautiful bold green eyes that were focused on me. She had snow white skin, and the barest hint of a blush on her high cheekbones. Her ruby red lips stood out, perfectly blended under a small even nose. It took me a minute to realize she was speaking. _

_"I said get on the ground!" she snarled, pointing her blaster at me. "Don't make me tell you again."_

_I glanced at Talix, and saw that he was already on his knees. "Dude, come on. I haven't got enough Force power left to stun a fly, let alone take on a pilot."_

_I started to get down, keeping my eyes on her the whole time. She looked stunned, her eyes widening and her face losing some hardness. "Your…your Jedi?" She let the point of her blaster fall just a bit. "My sister-"_

_Whatever she was about to say was cut off by a second jet landing beside us. Another pilot hopped out, removing his helmet to check out the scene in front of him. "Nice shot, Nayama! I already alerted command about our position. Lets get some stun-cuffs on these guys." She consented without saying a word. She kept her blaster trained on me, until I felt her soft hands pulling my arms off my head and down to my lower back. She was gentle, guiding my arms instead of roughly jerking them into place (as I have had some people do). I think she understood that I wasn't a threat to her, that there was no way I ever could have hurt such a beautiful woman._

"Query: Master, I do believe the ancient meat bag is malfunctioning. May I terminate him?" I came to and the first thing I saw were glowing red eyes. Hk-47 was examining me, pointing his blaster at me almost longingly.

"Down, boy." I gruffed at him, and groggily stood up. "Where the hell'd you come from?"

"Answer: Master's ship has been stolen by the warriors who live in the underground enclave here. I would have murdered the whole lot and returned to master as soon as possible, but the ancient meat-bag has confiscated it. Hopeful musing: I do so wish to get it back and use it in a most painful manner to get my revenge. Would that be possible, Master?"

Lola was watching her droid with an odd little half smile, while Bao-Dur was turning slightly green. "Maybe." Lola told Hk simply.

I wearily shook off the tiny space ships zooming around the edge of my vision. "Damn Carth, two crashes in one day? That's got to be some kind of record."

"Quiet old man. Getting shot down-twice-wasn't exactly the way I had hoped this would go." Carth said, kicking the side of the destroyed shuttle.

"Right," I said shortly, rubbing my head, "What shot us down?"

"Answer: Only the complete scum of the galaxy, the absolute filth from the darkest corner, the-"

"What is he rambling about?" I asked Mission, cutting him off.

She pointed to a point some distance away. "When we..._landed_ a few droids cornered us. They called themselves Hk-50s, and apparently someone out there is using them to try and capture Jedi. They had barely charged their blasters when this one," she pointed at Hk-47, "ran out from somewhere, yelling 'Touch the Master and loose an power conductor!' and started shooting everything in sight." I glanced over at Lola and Bao who were talking quietly to each other. Dustil was standing over the droids, rummaging for spare parts.

"Uh-huh. And where did you come from again?" I asked the droid.

Before he could answer a flurry of guards rushed out of a hidden entrance. Their leader shouted, "Hurry! The homicidal droid has escaped! We need to-" she stopped short, noticing the lot of us. "Ah...The mistress has been expecting you. Lay down your weapons and you shall not be harmed."

"Threat:-" Hk started.

"Quiet you," Lola snapped at him. "Who's your mistress?"

The leader looked annoyed, "I will not repeat myself again. Drop your weapons, or we will take them from you."

Lola seemed to hesitate, assessing our chances of survival. It would be an even split, if it came to a fight. There were something about these women, these pale warriors, that seemed more than familiar to me. _Do as they say_, I whispered to Lola through the Force, _I sense they mean us no harm._

Lola nodded, the barest movement of her head. "Very well. We'll play along."

"Disappointed statement:-"

"For now." she finished roughly, shooting a glare at her pet droid. They showed us the way into their enclave, making us wait under guard in the front room.

One of the guards left, disappearing into another room for a few minutes. Dustil spoke quietly, "Well, I guess Jolee was right to be worried. Only a bunch of whack Jedi would own a illegal landing pad in the middle of nowhere."

"They're not Jedi." I whispered to him, "Their Echani warriors. The question is, who's training them?"

"Hey Hk, You've been here for awhile, right? Have you learned anything useful?" Mission asked him.

Before he could answer, a door opened and the guard walked out. "The Mistress wishes to see you. Please, come with me." She spoke only to Lola.

When the rest of the group started to follow, more guards stepped out of the shadows. "Just the female Jedi. The rest of you will be contained for your own safety."

"Aw hell no-" Dustil started, but Carth laid a hand on his shoulder and he fell quiet.

"Alright, fine. We'll do this your way...for now." Carth said menacingly.

The guard started to escort Lola, but Hk's eyes gleamed. "Threat: touch the master and loose an arm, meat-bag."

The guard withdrew her hand and shot Hk a condescending look. "Please order your droid to come peacefully. We have had some difficulties...restraining him in the past."

Lola sighed, and I could tell she was weary of the whole facade already. "Hk, just go with them. If I don't return in less than an hour, feel free to wreak havoc on the whole lot."

Hk looked just about as smug as a droid could look. "Query: Hear that, meat-bag? I will be back!"

She led the group away, Hk's feet clanking on the durasteel floor. The guard turned to me, "You will have to go with the rest of your companions."

I looked deep into her eyes, and touched my words with a bit of the Force. "Oh, I don't think that that will be necessary. Just take me along to meet the 'mistress'."

"Yes…the mistress will be very delighted to meet you. Please, come with me." She motioned to another door on the other side of the room and Lola and I followed her. It looked to be like some sort of meeting place, with high backed chairs in the center of the room.

"Please wait here. I will return with the mistress shortly." Our guide quickly turned and headed out through an adjacent door that was down a long hallway.

Lola looked around with a slight shiver, "Okay…did anyone else's bull shavit alarm just go off?"

I nodded slightly as I looked down the side of the walkway into the dark depths below. It was so deep the bottom couldn't been seen-just endless darkness. I looked up when I heard a door hiss open.

"I did not expect to see you again after you fled to the outer rim. Tell me, why have you returned?" said the women in a long, billowing white gown. Due to the nature of the room, she was still far away on the walkway and I couldn't see her face, although something about her voice struck me as familiar.

"Tell me what you did with my companions first." Lola glared at her as she said the words.

"Your concern is noted…" the woman said again in that same familiar, haughty voice. "You friends have not been harmed. They have been detained, for their safety. I find it…unusual…that you are traveling with others again. I had thought you had forsaken the company of others after the war. Or is that why you are here, Revan?"

I moved closer to the woman. Obviously she knew Lola, and her past. The only question was how? Lola stepped forward, blocking my view of the woman yet again before speaking. "It was not my intention to come here, Atris, or to see you again."

"Yet here you are. Perhaps you do not know yourself as well as you think. Regardless, your arrival here begs an explanation." Atris continued. The name was so familiar to me. Atris? Atris…_Atris…_

"I'm here because the Sith have returned, and I had to warn the Republic. I haven't had the luxury of sitting here on my arse the past five or so years."

"Yes, I had heard of your exploits, suffering a memory swipe, saving the Republic, fleeing to the outer rim once the fanfare faded down. Of course, none of this would have happened if you had not disobeyed the council in the first place and became Darth Revan."

I expected Lola to jump down her throat, but she surprised me. "I did not come here to debate the past with you, Atris. The Sith are returning and we will need all the help we can get to fight them off."

"The Sith? What do you mean?" she at least sounded curious now, and not as haughty.

"I went to the outer rim because I remembered something that was there when I was Revan. The reason I fell to the dark side-the true Sith. They had been waiting all this time, growing stronger while the Republic was weakened by the many wars that the true Sith had a hand in. I went there to hold them back for a while, to give the Republic time to recover. But now they have returned…and they are hunting all Jedi."

"You speak truly," the woman said, "You have encountered the Sith. I can feel the scars on you. But there are no more Jedi…except I. Like you, they turned from the Order, and now only I remain."

"That's not true," Lola said, "Many of my companions are Jedi and-"

"Yes, I have studied you and your companions. Interesting company you keep. Bastila, who fell to the dark side and became Darth Malak's apprentice, a young ex-Sith boy, and a withered old man who speaks out against the Order. As I said, I am the last of the Jedi."

Lola sighed and apparently decided against arguing with her. "If so, then I offer you my help. You'll need it."

"You offer your aid? After turning your back on me…on the council?" she asked, almost incredulous. "The Jedi is not something you embrace out of fear. The commitment is stronger than that, something you never seemed to understand."

"But I understand war," Lola said, "And that's the sort of person you need on your side right now. The Jedi are scattered, if we could reunite them we might have a fighting chance at beating the oncoming Sith at their own game."

"I agree. If you could find them, gain their trust, perhaps our defenses shall be stronger for it. Take your ship, seek them out. If you find them, encourage them to gather on Dantooine-from there, we can call a council and see what can be done."

Lola gave her a small smile, "That was the plan from the start, until somebody decided it would be in the galaxy's best interest to steal my ship."

The woman gave a small indignant huff, "The last I had heard you where reclaiming you memories as the Dark Lord and fleeing to the outer rim. Can you blame me for acting?"

Lola shook her head, "No, I guess I see why you did what you did. I should probably go rescue your guards from HK-47. And Atris…I'm sorry for what I did."

"It is not me you have to apologize to. I have wondered all these years about why you disobeyed the council. I guess I am finally coming to a conclusion about your actions, and why you tried to convince me to follow you. Although I haven't forgiven you, I am beginning to see that you were just trying to do what was right. Let's just hope that your sense of right and wrong doesn't start another war."

I heard Lola give a small chuckle. "Indeed Atris. And I have reason to believe that the Republic is no friend to the Jedi, keep an eye out, will you?"

"Of course. Thank you, for the warning."

Lola gave another small nod before turning around and heading back the way we came, and I got my first glimpse of the woman. Her face was immediately familiar to me, she was an apprentice on Dantooine when I was a padawan there. But it was more than that, she and Lola used to be friends.

Lola motioned for me to follow her and I did, through the hallway and on to the holding cells where we gathered up the rest of our gang.

"Alright, Hk. Where's the _Hawk_?" Lola asked the red droid.

"Answer: I believe it to be just through those doors there, master. But I would not recommend that you go that way because-" Whatever Hk was going to warn us against was drowned out as Mission pressed the door open.

"T3-M4!" Mission exclaimed happily, and the droid beeped in response.

"-You'll encounter the beeping tin can…" Hk-47 finished dejectedly, and I managed to hold back a laugh.

Lola ignored him. "T3, are you alright?"

The droid beeped mournfully. Mission deactivated the force field surrounding him and said, "Hey, it wasn't your fault they stole the _Ebon Hawk_!"

T3 beeped graciously at her before turning back to Lola. His beeping was faster now, more frantic.

"Hold on there," Carth said, "What information is he talking about?"

"Apparently he downloaded some useful information while he was here." Lola said, "C'mon, we'll talk about it on the ship. Right now, I just wanna get going."

T3 led us down to the hangar where the _Ebon Hawk_ was. I had to blink to make sure it really was our ship, it had burn marks all over it. In places the steel had worn thin or was missing altogether. The turrets were rusting, and the cockpit windows had a thin cover of grime coating it.

"What did you do to my ship?" Carth asked incredulously. He was staring up at all of the carbon scoring on the side with a look of horror on his face.

"Well, you can't go meandering about the outer rim without some damage to your ship, Carth." Lola chastised him gently.

"Come on guys, we need to get back to the station." Mission said while dropping the loading ramp.

The rest of us loaded back onto the _Ebon Hawk_, while a fierce sense of nostalgia hit me.

_Here we go again_. I thought.

**Hahaha! Dejavu anyone? Also I want to apologize to those who got the preview, that was actually in the other chapter, and should be appearing shortly. Sorry for any confusion! And I promise you, they _will_ be off Telos in the next chapter!**

**Loved it? Hated it? Send me a review and you'll get a preview of the next chapter! **

**1,000 internet cookies for those who review, and those who go check out my new story, Kotor-The Musical. It's a walkthrough of the first KoTOR game, complete with singing, dancing, and complete hilarity! Go read and review that one too, Please! **


	8. A Kiss, A Laugh, A Goodbye

**Another chapter? So soon? Yes! And they FINALLY get off of Telos! Yay! Enjoy, the best people in the galaxy for reading my work, and thank you to rockforthecross74 for betaing this!**

**Sarah – **

Call it what you will- angry, upset, _pissed_…I was all of the above as I stormed into the Republic Embassy.

"Mrs. Onasi," the pleasant-faced secretary said in greeting, rising with a smile. She halted when she saw the look on my face.

"Where is he?" I all but snarled at her. Her face had shock written all over it.

"Um…Can I help you find someone?"

I almost shouted "My husband!" before forcing myself to take a deep breath. "Where will I be able to find Admiral Carth Onasi?"

"He is on Telos' surface, currently on a mission. Can I help you with anything?" the secretary still looked bewildered, but she managed to speak in a calm, cool voice.

"Please alert me when he comes in. I will be waiting in his office." It wasn't exactly protocol, but by the look on her face, she wasn't going to deny me anything right now.

"Okay, down the hall and to the right. Have a nice day-" she started, but her voice fell quiet when she saw the glare on my face.

I stormed into Carth's office, catching myself a split second before I ended up slamming the door. Taking a deep breath, I managed to close it in a dignified manner. This wasn't who I was…yelling at secretaries, slamming doors…I had just found out about the mission. The mission where Carth was planning to take off for Force knew how long, cruising about the galaxy. The mission that he had told me nothing about.

It just seemed like everything was spinning out of control. A few days ago, I had no doubts about where I would be right now. I would be Mrs. Carth Onasi, spending two weeks in his arms on our honeymoon, and would be content in my life. Now, ever since Lola dropped out of nowhere, I felt that I was losing control. I wasn't even officially Carth's wife now, even though I had accepted the title. Now I had just found out that he was leaving, with his ex-girlfriend, no less.

I slumped down into his ultra-plush chair behind his desk and let out a weary sigh. Perhaps I was over-reacting. Lots of women had their fiancé's **exes** storm their weddings, and then take off with them only days later. On second thought, maybe I was _under_-reacting.

An alarm chimed on his desk, and I moved some of the papers to turn it off. I moved a stack and found one of his wristwatches, the alarm blaring away. I pressed the button on the side and it fell silent. When I set the papers back down on his desk, I noticed they were marked 'Classified'.

To read or not to read? That was the question… for about half a second anyway, then I was on those like Sherlock Holmes on a caffa binge. They were from the Governess, outlining the orders Carth had received. Orders that had been given to him; not orders he volunteered for, as I had assumed. The more I read, the angrier I became. But this time my anger was directed at the _Governess_, not at Carth or Lola.

_That Schutta!_ I thought to myself before rising from my chair. I headed down the corridor and threw open the Governess's door without knocking. Her personal secretary rose at the sudden interruption.

"Beat it," I said to the girl.

"Excuse me? I don't know who you think you are, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave before I call the guards in," she replied.

I looked at the Governess, who was still perched behind her desk with regal sincerity, "Tell your minion to leave, or I'll say my piece in front of her."

The Governess waited a beat before nodding at the girl. She left without a word, closing the grand wooden doors behind her. "Hello Sarah. I must say your entrance was rather entertaining. Bold is not usually your style."

I narrowed my eyes at her, "Cut the crap, Tasha. I want to know what gives."

She cocked a perfectly outlined eyebrow, "I would tell you, if only I knew what you were talking about."

"This!" I said, and tossed the stack of papers onto her desk, the bold word 'Classified' staring out at me accusingly.

"Ah," she said, but didn't move. "I still don't see how any of this pertains to you, Miss Leon, but if you leave now I won't report you for somehow getting a hold of and reading _classified _information."

I barely held back a snort. Usually I was composed and dignified, but being in her presence made me want to be as impertinent as possible. "Don't give me that bantha-shavit! We both know that 'classified' doesn't give a damn. Not anymore. Not after you made me break that man's heart."

She sniffed and sat up. "Very well, although you have seen to it that 'that man' hasn't stayed broken-hearted for long, haven't you?" I didn't answer. "Now, what about this particular mission do you want to know?"

"I want to know why you chose Carth. Why my husband? Why now?"

"In response to your first question: it is very simple. Admiral Onasi is an excellent soldier, an impressive judge of character, and extremely slow to trust. Exactly the kind of person I need on this mission. The others are just as easily answered. The fact that he is you _future_ husband played no part in my evaluation. Nor did the timing. After all I've done for you these past years, I did not expect you to object. Or have you forgotten that already?" She gave me a scathing look.

"I don't owe you anything. Not anymore. I paid that debt in full four years ago. Or have you forgotten _that_ already?"

She leaned in closer to me, "I remember that night. Possibly, even more clearly than you do. I remember that you disobeyed my orders, causing the Republic months of wasted resources to undo the damage from your mistake."

"And how much longer would it have been before he accepted the fact that she was gone had I not disobeyed your 'orders'? He _never_ would have, but you're just too much of a heartless shrew to see that."

She sank back in her chair. "Perhaps that is true, perhaps it is entirely wrong. We shall never know now, and must accept the past, mangled as it may be. It may be that your plan has worked to our benefit after all. Lola has returned, giving us the chance to administer justice as it is needed. I trust you can show yourself out?"

I glared at her for a moment more, before turning on my heel and exciting. Some habits died hard.

I sighed when I reached Carth's office. Perhaps I shouldn't have been so hard on Tasha**…** I mean, the _Governess_. It was still odd for me to address her by her title. It had been years, but she was once my commanding officer…and my way out of the Republic navy.

My father had been a captain of a ship in the navy, while my mother stayed home to raise my sister and I. While my father had been away on numerous assignments, my mother amused herself by taking my sister and I shopping. She loved to dress us up in any number of outfits, many that she made by herself. It only seemed natural that when my sister got older, she would go into the fashion industry. She began modeling, taking a few jobs here and there for holovid commercials and the like. When my mother died, my sister couldn't handle it. She thought that if she could only make the next audition, make the next photo shoot, she could make our mother proud. She began eating less and less, literally starving herself to make herself skinnier, prettier, happier. She couldn't see that it was having the opposite effect; she was too thin. Too thin for employers to hire her. She ended up feeling rejected, and reduced her food intake even more. It was a vicious cycle.

I had always loved clothes, but my father could see what a career in fashion was doing to my sister. Everything finally came to a stop when I was preparing to make my way into the world of fashion. My sister collapsed at an audition. My dreams of becoming a designer died the night the clinic called my father to tell him my sister suffered from anorexia nervosa. My sister went to rehab, and I went to basic training.

My father believed that anyone could make a good life in the navy, through hard work and discipline. He wouldn't stand for the ways of the fashion industry. I had been in the military for four years, when my aging father had convinced me to re-up for another four. I was a year into my first extra year when my father started having heart problems, culminating into a heart attack that took his life. I stayed an extra year in the navy, probably out of loyalty to my father, before the missions and sense of duty slowly drove me mad. I hated life in the military, and now that my father wasn't around to constantly preach about the bonuses of life in the navy, I wanted out. Badly. So much so, that I made a deal with my commanding officer.

She'd agreed to terminate my last two years of duty if I'd remember that I owed her a favor. "For sometime in the future," she had said with a slight smile. I didn't think too much of her statement at the time, and took my honorable discharge and created Sarah's Boutique Critique.

Then came the night when she called in her favor.

_Tasha had sent a runner over to my house. He told me to arrive at her office at one-hundred hours, and to come alone. I hadn't seen my commanding officer in years, and her cryptic message to arrive at the embassy in the middle of the night filled me with dread. Something was wrong, and in my urge to find out exactly what it was, I showed up a half hour early._

_I didn't have any problems getting through the security, even though she was now elected Governess of Telos IV. In my opinion__**,**__ Tasha had set this meeting up so I could get in and out with as few eyes on me as possible. _

_I walked into her office. Despite the early morning, her clothes were crisp and clean, and she was wide awake. "Good, you're here," she said upon my entrance._

"_Yes…I'm here," I said cautiously. She wasn't one for stating the obvious. _

"_I need your help. A soldier under my command, a Captain Onasi__**,**__ is involved romantically with Jedi Knight Lola Amazzu, formerly known as Darth Revan. I had let their relationship continue, until my tech commander downloaded this file off of a astromech droid." She tapped a few keys on her desk. A hologram of a man appeared, presumably Captain Onasi. _

"_T3, there's not much time," the hologram began speaking, "Now, I've seen this look on her face before. I don't know where she's planning on going, but its dangerous."_

_The man adopted a heartbroken expression, but his voice didn't lose the purposefulness in it, "She's going to leave without telling me- I don't know why, but there's a chance that she'll take you. If she does, I need you to watch out for her." He paused before continuing, "She's strong…but she can't face everything alone."_

_The man looked over his shoulder as the faint sound of footsteps could be overheard. His next words were rushed, "Do what you can, T3. If she doesn't make it back, then I need you to come back, find help. If not me, then other Jedi, the Republic…I can't lose her, even if she wants to be lost." The transmition cut off as the silhouette of a woman could barely be seen entering the room._

"_My intelligence agency just reported seeing Jedi Amazzu leaving Citadel Station in her ship, the Ebon Hawk. Captain Onasi was not with her. We believe that the time Carth was speaking of is upon us, and we need to act quickly." She handed me a datapad. "Here are the directions to Captain Onasi's private quarters. Search the premises. I want any traces of Jedi Amazzu's whereabouts, and any information she left behind on how to reach her."_

_It took me a second for her words to sink in. "Are you serious? You want me to remove all traces of her from this man's life?"_

_She nodded, raising an eyebrow as if wondering why I was making a fuss over this mission. "You owe me, Sarah. I'm calling in the favor. Captain Onasi is a valued soldier of the Republic navy, and I cannot afford to have him leaving Telos to chase after this addled idea of having a romance with the former Dark Lord. The publicity of his actions regarding her have come at a great cost to his career and the Republic, and I will not stand for any more losses."_

"_So that's it? You're just going to let this guy believe the love of his life ran off on him?" I stared at her incredulously while she nodded calmly. "Okay…ignoring the fact that I might not do this for you, why do you _want_ me to do this in the first place?"_

"_Political deniability," she answered immediately, leaning back in her chair. "You are no longer connected to the Republic, so if you are caught breaking and entering, there will be no back-lash on the navy." Or her, but she didn't say so._

_I glared at her, "Ah…so you've got all your bases covered. Except one. What the hell am I supposed to do if I get caught?"_

"_That is none of my concern."_

"_Yeah, okay. I think I'm going to walk right out of this office, right now, and forget everything you just told me." I tossed the datapad on her desk and turned to go._

"_Of course, I could just reinstate your draft into the navy." I froze, and turned to see her smiling coldly at me. "Someone could 'accidentally' leave out your files, and it could get out that you never finished your enlistment. They don't look too kindly on AWOL's."_

_She had me there, and by the contented look on her face, she knew it. The nightmares, the horrors of war…they had just begun to fade into the background of my mind. I couldn't re-enlist now. "Sparkling new uniforms and blasters. Think about it, Sarah. Or you can do this for me right now, and we'll call it even." She held the datapad out to me._

_I hesitated a beat, maybe two, before reaching out and snatching the datapad from her grasp. _

"_There. Now was that so hard?" she smiled sweetly at me before turning back to some papers on her desk. Did the woman never sleep? "I trust you can show yourself out."_

_I scowled at her and all the way down the street as I followed the directions to Captain Onasi's house. It was all quiet, and I quickly compared the address on the datapad to the one on the house in front of me. This was it._

_I sneaked around back, feeling like a complete idiot. Stealth had never been the strong suit in my training, and I hadn't tried to use any skills in a long time. I tried the back door. Locked._

"_Of course it's locked, you idiot!" I quietly berated myself, "He's a Captain in the navy; one that's got a ton of trust issues, if the rumors are right. Why _wouldn't_ he lock his doors at night?" So now I was back to square one. I thought about trying the windows, but figured I'd have the same amount of luck. I headed around front, hoping to find a hidden key somewhere. After looking around potted plants, rocks and the top of the door, I threw my hands up in exasperation. _

"_Come on! Who _doesn't_ keep a key hidden around here somewhere?" I, for one, had used my own hidden key many times after losing my keys, usually leaving them at the store. I sighed and hung my head, certain that I'd be reporting for duty in no time. _

_I caught a glimpse of something glinting underneath the door frame. I bent down and used my fingernails to pull it out, wincing when I saw the long scratch the door frame made on my polish. My annoyance was completely forgotten when I saw what I had pulled out. A key! I tried it in the door and held my breath until I heard the bolt catch and turn, unlocking the door. I was in._

Aww yeah!_ I thought to myself,_ Who's still got it! I've still got it!_ My celebration quickly ended when I heard a light snoring to my left. The bedroom door was open, and I could see a man's frame covered with a sheet on the bed. Propelled by curiosity, I wandered into the bedroom, stepping on the outside of my feet as to not make a sound._

_He was extremely handsome. There was enough moonlight streaming in from the windows for me to make out his features. He had dark curly hair, slightly mussed from his pillows. He was shirtless, and his arms and chest bulged with muscles. I saw the light smattering of hair dusted across his chest, along with the shadow of hair across his chin. He sighed and rolled over, and two pieces of hair bounced in front of his face. Enthralled, I took a few steps closer, wincing when the floor squeaked under my feet. The man turned again, mumbling "Dustil…" in his sleep. _

_I froze, waiting until he started his light snoring before taking a step closer. I could see something nestled in between the folds of the covers._

_It was a datapad. I clicked the 'on' button and winced when the small screen filled the room with light. I glanced back to him, but he hadn't stirred. There were two files saved on the device._

_I clicked one and began reading. It had a holonet address saved on it, with a note underneath it. "Here's how to contact me when I'm gone. The site is completely secure, and absolutely untraceable. I don't want to lose you, Carth. We can communicate through here, possibly make the distance seem smaller somehow. I love you, and I'll be waiting for your first post."_

_Ignoring my conscience, I clicked the delete button, sending the heart-wrenching message and the holonet address into nothingness. Sighing, I clicked the next file open._

"_Carth…" it started out, "I ah…I don't know how to say this. I'm not sure exactly what to tell you, or how to tell you. I just want to say, I'm so, so, so sorry for hurting you like this. I never meant it to end this way. Remember those nights when I would wake up and couldn't fall back asleep? I told you they were just bad dreams, but they were memories. Something's coming. Something that I started back when I was Revan, and now I have to put an end to it." Her words worried me, but I couldn't think about the future ramifications of more Sith. Not now. _

_The message continued. _"_I love you. And I wish that this message could go on forever so I'd never truly have to say goodbye. But I won't forget you. And I'm going to try to come back, I just. . . I'm not making any promises. Just Carth, please don't forget me."_

_I blinked back tears. What was I doing here? It was evident that these two loved each other, and I was coming between that. Ignoring the Governess' threats from earlier, I turned off the device and left it in the middle of his bed, file intact. The sun was just beginning to rise, so I did my stealth walk out of the room. I bent and left the key in front of the door, in a patch of slowly brightening sunlight. _

_As I grasped the doorknob in my hand, a picture on the wall caught my attention. It was the sleeping man, standing next to a beautiful woman with long black hair and sparkling blue eyes. In between the two was a young blue twi-lek, smiling and crossing her eyes at the camera. There was a young teenage boy in the picture too, looking at the twi-lek and smirking. He also had his arm around the woman named Lola. The love was evident in the photo, and I stood staring for a moment before I heard rustling in the next room. _

"_Lola?" I heard him call from the next room. Quickly, I scurried out the front door before I was caught. I sprinted down the street, pausing only when I reached the corner. I looked back at the house, and murmured "I'm sorry…" before I turned the corner and headed back to the store._

I pulled out a pad of paper from Carth's desk drawer and began doodling some random dress designs. I tried to ignore the constant pang of guilt that had hounded me ever since the wedding, but here in the quiet**,** it gave me too much time to think. I had always wondered what would have happened when and if Lola returned to Carth, but I figured that it would never happen. The outer rim was a dark and dangerous place. I knew that from experience.

The few times I had talked about her with Carth**,** he had expressed worries that she might've died on the outer rim, and while I didn't deny the fact that she could still have been alive, I didn't exactly tell him to hold out hope.

"What am I doing here?" I murmured out loud to myself, letting the pen in my hand fall to the pad of paper. Maybe it was time for me to back off. I loved Carth with all my heart, but there where times when I just knew he was envisioning Lola in his arms instead of me. He still loved her, no matter how many times he tried to deny it. The change in him the past few days had been evident, more so to me than anyone else. He was more distracted at home, but it wasn't just that. He had a light in his eyes that hadn't been there a few days ago, he approached the day with more vitality and eagerness than I had ever seen in him. He seemed excited by life again, and it hurt me to know that I wasn't the one who evoked the change in him. Lola had.

I heard footsteps outside the office door. I hastily picked up my pen again and started sketching. I barely glanced up when Carth walked in and shut the door behind him.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw him take in the 'Classified' file that still lay open on his desk. "So…I um, I guess you heard about the mission," he said awkwardly.

I gave him the barest of nods. "Yep. Good luck on it. Sounds important. Fate of the galaxy and all that."

He shuffled his feet, not quite sure what to make of my distance. "Yeah…so, I came to say goodbye."

"Goodbye."

He blinked. "That's it?"

I sighed and set my pen down, finally making eye contact with him for the first time. "What do you want from me Carth? You decided to take this mission without _once_ consulting me on it. I know we're not technically married yet, but I was hoping that you trusted me enough by now to come to me with things like that.

"Not that it would have made much of a difference. Orders are orders, whether you approve of them or not." I shot him a glare, and he sighed and sat on the corner of his desk. "I'm sorry. That was uncalled for. Listen, I don't want to fight with you. We're leaving tonight…I was hoping you'd have lunch with me?"

"Of course. What did you have in mind?"

He gave me a heart-stopping boyish grin. He didn't smile like that often, and I lived for the times he did. It crinkled his warm chocolate eyes, and brought out his one-sided dimple. "Actually, I'm dying for some of that Telosian take-out from the restaurant down the street from our house. I'll bring some back here and we can share it. Sound good?"

It _sounded_ cheap to me, but I smiled at him. "Whatever you want. I'll still be here when you get back." Lately it seemed I had been smiling and going along with a lot of what he said, even if I didn't agree with it. Were sore cheeks a sign of a relationship gone bad?

He got up from the desk. He took a step closer to me, and surprised me when he bent down closer to my face. He swept a finger along my jaw, bringing my face up to meet his. I lost myself in his kiss.

The door swept open, and we jumped apart like two teenagers caught together behind the school yard. I glanced up to see who it was. Lola.

She looked surprised to see us together, and more than a little embarrassed. "I-I'm sorry. I'll come back later…" she managed to stammer out.

"No need," Carth said stiffly, straightening up. "I was just leaving." With that, he strode out of the room. Curiously, I observed the pains they took not to touch while passing through the doorway. She glanced after him, and then back at me.

"I can come back later, if you'd like," she said, still standing in the doorway.

"Nonsense. I'm just working on a few sketches. Is there anything I can help you with?"

She looked cautiously into the office before stepping in and letting the door close behind her. "I was just hoping to get some paperwork done for the trip. Docking papers, passports…things like that. **"**I motioned her closer inside. "I can help you with that. You don't get to be involved with an admiral without putting up with a lot of paperwork. "We exchanged a small smile, and she sat in one of the fancy chairs on the other side of the desk. "You're too kind, Sarah."

My smile faded as another pang of guilt stabbed me. I wasn't kind at all, not really. I could see, perhaps even more clearly now, how I was coming in between these two. I should probably step back for a while, let Carth have the space he needed to make a rational decision. "Mmm…" I hummed noncommittally while booting up his computer. I held my hand out and she placed a datapad in it, reminding me yet again of that torturous night. These days everything was done electronically, and I downloaded the necessary forms onto her datapad.

"That should do it," I said, unplugging her datapad. I turned back to her, and was shocked to see a pained expression on her face. "Lola? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine…it's just…" she took a deep breath and accepted the datapad I held out to her. She played with it in her lap for a moment before looking up and meeting my questioning eyes. "It's just…while on Telos' surface…I kissed Carth."

I think my mouth might have dropped open, because I distinctly remember shutting it. My eyebrows disappeared into my hairline, while I did my best impression of a fish without water. "Excuse me?" I managed to stammer out.

"I didn't mean for it to happen. I just don't want my actions to come between the two of you. I apologize for my indiscretion." Her eyes still had that same pained look as she continued. "I want to make it clear that _I _kissed _him,_ not the other way around."

I continue to look at her, dumbfounded, while her eyes silently begged me to say something. I finally gathered enough of my wits to ask her a question. "Why are you telling me this?"

She gave me an odd look that I was too perplexed to decipher. "I've done enough to royally mess up Carth's life, and I'm sick of coming between him and what he wants." She shrugged, "You're what he wants. So I'm not going to come between that. I promise you." She stood, clutching the datapad close to her.

"I…I'm not sure what to say…" This changed everything. I was willing to take a step down and let Carth figure out what he wanted, but not if Lola was going around kissing him! I felt a spurt of jealous rage flare inside me, and I narrowed my eyes at her. "Make sure it doesn't happen again."

"Of course it won't!" she assured me. "I'm not even sure why it happened in the first place!"

We stared at each other a moment longer, and it seemed as if we were seeing each other in a new light. We were now rivals, and we could both feel the change in our relationship. "Perhaps you should leave," I told her, and she rose to her feet.

"Of course. And I am sorry, Sarah. It won't happen again." This time I wasn't sure who she was promising, herself or me. She pressed the door controls, and the hiss of the door sliding open was the only sound in the room. They closed again after she left, and I was left alone in the room with a swath of mixed feelings.

On one hand I still suffered from crippling guilt over ending her chances of continuing their relationship. After all, I had been the one to keep them apart for _four years._ But there was no way I was going to just give Carth up (?) without a fight. I wasn't the one who forced Lola to leave all those years ago, just like I wasn't the one who made her stay away. I had been there for Carth through each lonely night after lonely night. I had _earned_ my place by his side, slowly gaining his trust and affection. If at the end of this, Carth wanted to go back to Lola, I would let him go good naturedly, but this time, I was going to fight for what I wanted.

Carth came back, holding two bags of take-out. He looked around the small room before asking, "Did Lola get what she needed?"

"Yes. I was able to help her with that," I replied, quickly changing the subject. "What did you get? It smells great," I cleared a spot on the desk, and he set down the white packages of food.

"Just the usual," he said simply, while pulling up a chair. I opened one of the containers and found my favorite**:** Bantha skewers on white, flat, limp, noodles that were somehow slightly sweet. He handed me a plastic fork and we dug in. I tried to ignore the growing trepidation in my heart. I didn't mention that I knew about the kiss. In my opinion, it would do more harm than good to our relationship.

We talked about inconsequential things, enjoying our lunch until he sighed and glanced at the clock. "I should probably leave. I still have to get packed."

I nodded while throwing my trash into the rubbish bin. "Of course. Do you need some help?"

He shook his head. "No thanks, I'm used to having to pack at a moments notice." Of course he would be. He had been a soldier for years. "I'll see you at the docks later?"

I nodded silently, and he left. I leaned back in my chair and rubbed my temples, trying to stave off the upcoming headache. This afternoon had brought up a lot of unwanted emotion, as well as some unpleasant memories. I tried to relax my shoulders, hoping to relieve some of the tension I felt. It didn't work. I decided to take a long walk around Citadel Station and clear my head.

A few hours later, I decided to head over to the docks. The exercise and the fresh air had helped relax me, and I was in a better mood than when I arrived.

The crew was busy loading crates of supplies into the cargo hold, and for a moment I just watched the flurry of activity. Canderous was yelling at a few Republic privates who had apparently dropped a carton full of his blaster's power cells. Bastila was using the Force to float packages of clothing into the right rooms with military precision. A few more soldiers watched her, awed by the show. Lola was busy directing everything, and she didn't notice me, which was just as well. I didn't think we had anything left to say to each other.

Dustil came down the loading ramp with Mission, and he headed over when he saw me. "I think this is the most efficient I've ever seen the Republic Military," he joked.

"Oh yeah," I said sarcastically, "'Cause you know every mission is executed with utmost care and timeliness. It's never 'hurry up and wait'."

He smirked, but it faded when he caught the expression on my face. "How are you holding up? Bet this is nowhere near how you imagined your honeymoon."

I sighed. "I'll have to admit, I had a few different ideas for what we'd be doing." I gave him a small smile, "I'm okay. Been there, done that, and all those clichés. You have to prepare for Republic madness when you're involved with an admiral."

"Yeah I guess-" he started, but the sight of something over my left shoulder stopped him cold.

"What? What's the matter?" I asked him. When he didn't respond, I whirled to my left to see what he was staring at.

It was orange. It was _orange!_ Not just a pleasant muted orange, but a florescent, glow-in-the-dark, in your face, ORANGE. It seemed to radiate off of the jacket as the wearer strode toward us. Dustil started snickering, but it took me a moment longer to take my eyes off of the fashion massacre, and actually focus on the person who had the gall to wear something so _hideous _in public.

"Aw, shizz! Now this is more like it! Carth is _back,_ baby!" Mission called out happily. Her voice startled me into looking into the face of the wearer of the faux-pas. It was Carth, the man who vowed to stand by me for better or for worse. The man who had spent hours in my store trying on different suits for Republic events, listening to me lecture on the rules of fashion. My Carth, who was wearing a jacket I would have burned if I had seen it in his closet.

Dustil's snickering turned into a full blown cackle. He understood better than Carth why the only fashion designer he knew was staring at his dad as if he had taken off all of his clothes and started dancing the Macarena. "I'll ah…I'll leave you alone to figure this one out. Nice jacket, Dad." He left, leaving us alone with the echo of his laughter.

"What…is…_that?"_ I managed to say, albeit hoarsely. I touched the sleeve gingerly, wanting to make sure the nightmare was true. Unfortunately, I wasn't hallucinating.

"It's my old flight jacket. It's a good luck charm. The color's a bit harsh, but it fits right in with Republic uniforms." He glanced at my face, startled to see me staring at him shell-shocked. "What?" he asked, unabashed.

"Carth…I am a _fashion_ designer! You are my _husband_! If any of my clients saw you wearing that…I'd be laughed right out of the fashion industry!" I cringed, glancing around to make sure nobody standing in the vicinity had a holorecorder out.

He straightened his back, giving me a frosty look. "That's what you're worried about? Your _image_?"

I mentally took a deep breath, and gave him an apologetic look. "You're right. I'm sorry. I'll miss you, though maybe you should leave this behind when you come home?"

He smirked, and engulfed me in his arms. "I'm just glad nobody in my old squad had the same sense of fashion as you do. I'll miss you **too**. I'll be sure to call you when I make reports to command." He brought his face down to mine, pressing his lips gently against mine. When we broke apart, my gaze flickered over his shoulder and I saw Lola staring at us with steely eyes. When our eyes met**,** she dropped her gaze and knelt to pick up **a **container at her feet.

"I should probably help everything get loaded. We'll be departing in a few moments." He let go of me and strode over to Jolee, who was lecturing a few soldiers with stricken looks on their faces.

The last container was soon heaved into place on the _Hawk_. The soldiers were dismissed, with a chorus of thank you's from some of the crew.

"Alright everyone! Crew meeting, right now!" Lola called out to everyone. She stood on the loading ramp, and everyone fell into place around her. Mission hooked her arm around my shoulders and dragged me forward.

"You're not part of the crew, but you can suffer through the meeting with the rest of us." I gave her a smile. Mission didn't exactly agree with my relationship with Carth, but she had never been unfriendly.

"Alright, we need to figure out where we're heading. T3 downloaded the last known positions of all the masters. Master Kavar on Dxun, Vash on Korriban, Zez-Kai Ell on Nar Shaddaa." She made a face, "And Master Vrook on Dantooine."

"Oh, come _on!_" Mission said, "Of all the Masters to be left in the galaxy, why in the name of the Force does one of them have to be Vrook?"

A few of us, namely me, Dustil, and a Zabrak I hadn't met yet, looked confused. The rest laughed at Mission's comment, but didn't look like they disagreed with her. Even Bastila, who was usually fiercely protective of her Jedi Council, cracked a smile.

"What planet is closest?" Jolee asked Lola.

She gave a sad smirk. "Dantooine." The crew groaned, and she continued. "I guess we're all in agreement that that's _not_ our first choice. Nar Shaddaa is almost the same distance. I vote we go there first. Any objections?" She waited for a minute. Nobody objected.

"Okay then. I think we've got our destination in mind. Jedi Shan, Admiral Onasi, would you mind getting us on our way?" Everyone noticed her abrupt shift to formality, but only Carth and I understood why. She was ashamed of her kissing Carth, and was trying to prove to me she could be good. _She better be…_

I stepped back as I watched them file onto the ship. Lola, Bastila, Carth, Mission and Dustil - who were holding hands – and the same Zabrak from before, only now he had a small droid beeping happily behind him. Then came a small blue and white astromech droid, followed by another red droid who was taller than me and was caressing a blaster longer than my arm. Canderous took the rear. He slammed the latch release on the loading ramp and it hissed upward, sealing them all from my gaze.

"Ma'am?" a hanger deck worker said to me, "They're preparing for takeoff. You need to leave, or you can head up to observation deck."

I gave him a nod before climbing the stairs to O.D. They would be dropping the force-field around the hanger, and the room would have been immediately depressurized. A few more workers nodded at me, but nobody contested my presence.

After a short wait, I felt and saw the engines to the _Hawk_ turn on, and begin launch procedures. The bird lifted from the ground, slightly unsteady, but Carth soon had her under control. A green light flickered on by the hanger wall, indicating that the force-field was down and they were clear for take-off. They exited the hangar, and I watched as they grew smaller and smaller. They were just a small dot on the horizon when they traveled out of the planet's gravitational pull and entered hyperspace. There was a flash of light, and they were gone.

"And they're off," I mumbled, still staring at the exact spot they disappeared.

Whatever happened between Carth and Lola now was beyond my control.

**And their off! Up next, Nar Shaddaa! What do you think about Sarah's decision to 'fight for what she wants'? Do you think Lola should back down? What do you think of the cold governess? And most importantly, what do you think about Sarah ruining Lola's attempt at staying in contact with Carth? Leave me a review and let me know! Any reviewers get a preview of the next chapter and a thousand internet cookies from me! :D**


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